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肩書を与える: A 星／主役にする Danced (1945) Author: Gertrude Lawrence (1898-1952) * A 事業／計画（する） Gutenberg of Australia eBook * eBook No.: 0700891h.html Language: English Date first 地位，任命するd: July 2007 Date most recently updated: July 2007 This ebook was produced by: Dr 示す 耐える Akrigg canadianebooks@gmail.com 事業／計画（する） Gutenberg of Australia eBooks are created from printed 版s which are in the public domain in Australia, unless a copyright notice is 含むd. We do NOT keep any eBooks in 同意／服従 with a particular paper 版. Copyright 法律s are changing all over the world. Be sure to check the copyright 法律s for your country before downloading or redistributing this とじ込み／提出する. This eBook is made 利用できる at no cost and with almost no 制限s どれでも. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the 条件 of the 事業／計画（する） Gutenberg of Australia License which may be 見解（をとる）d online at http://gutenberg.逮捕する.au/licence.html
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Contents
"Lunch in London, the day after tomorrow...'
The 船長／主将 dropped the words out of one corner of his mouth without 乱すing the cigarette in the other corner. He 性質の／したい気がして of some three thousand miles of atmosphere as nonchalantly as you would 投げ上げる／ボディチェックする a peanut 爆撃する over your shoulder.
I blinked. But only once. After all, the past two days had been so fantastic that this ultimate scene and conversation on the brilliantly lighted 離着陸場 outside a city in one of the Southern 明言する／公表するs, beside the big 定期航空機 which was to take me to England in a scheduled thirty-six hours, seemed part and 小包 of the events that had been happening 厚い and 急速な／放蕩な ever since the telephone woke me at seven o'clock one morning.
The telephone had 召喚するd me from a dream in which Richard and I were running, 手渡す in 手渡す, 負かす／撃墜する our own 狭くする （土地などの）細長い一片 of Cape Cod beach into the ocean. Sleepily, unwilling to let go of that dream, I reached for the receiver and held it to my ear. New York calling. At Dennis, Cape Cod, at seven o'clock of a May morning, New York seems as far away as London or Timbuktu.
"Are you up?" the 発言する／表明する of my lawyer 需要・要求するd crisply.
Knowing me as she does, this was 純粋に a rhetorical question which, I felt, did not 率 an answer. She went on: "Get up! 権利 away! Get yourself の上に the first 計画（する）, or the first train, into New York. I've just had word from the 空気／公表する 省 in Washington that there is space for you on the British 航空路s 計画（する） leaving at midnight tomorrow. You're on your way."
After weeks of more or いっそう少なく 患者 waiting, repeated timid, pleading, 緊急の, and finally importunate requests to the 当局 who 支配する such 事柄s in Washington and London, and a 早い-解雇する／砲火／射撃 一斉射撃，（質問などの）連発／ダム of 電報電信s, cables, and telephone calls, it had happened. At last I had 許可 to do what I had been wanting 猛烈に to do for four years—go to England and do my bit on a 小旅行する for E.N.S.A. Though no one knew just when, everyone was aware that the 侵略 of Europe was 切迫した. More than anything in the world I 手配中の，お尋ね者 the 適切な時期 to entertain the British and American 軍隊／機動隊s who would soon be fighting in フラン.
Basil Dean, 創立者 and director of E.N.S.A.—the British 同等（の） of the U.S.O.—had cabled, asking me to come; but getting a 優先 to make the crossing and getting a place 船内に a 計画（する） had taken a lot of wire-pulling at the American end. Now, I was really on my way home to London which I had not seen in six years. I would see my old friends, or at least those who remained of that gay company after the 戦う／戦い of Britain—those who weren't fighting in Italy or the 近づく and Far East, or on any one of the seven seas.
And I might see Richard.
That thought brought me out of bed and under the にわか雨 in one swift leap. From then on the next two days were one mad 急ぐ, winding up with the final leap to the airport.
And now here I was, ready to board the big 定期航空機 for the hop to Newfoundland. I caught my breath, and did my best to imitate the casual-almost-to-the-point-of-退屈 空気／公表する shown by all members of all the 空気／公表する 軍隊s I have ever met when they are about to take off.
I was 保証するd of passage to Newfoundland, where we were 予定 to land at 9:00 A.M. the next day. Whether there would be a place for me in the 計画（する） going on from there to Ireland remained disturbingly uncertain. We all joked about it, standing there beside the 計画（する）. The others were sure of their passage all the way to England. They were 公式の／役人s or had 外交の パスポートs and were bursting with 優先s. But I had only a number-three 優先, which 保証（人）d me nothing much more than leave to hitch-引き上げ（る）.
Ernest Hemingway was の中で the 好意d ones. I met him then for the first time. There is something about Mr. Hemingway that makes one think of a small boy—a rather mischievous small boy whose pockets are 十分な of bits of string, old rusty nails, chewing gum, and maybe a pet toad or two. A small boy hiding behind a big, bushy 耐えるd. He asked me, grinning:
"Suppose there is no place for you on the 計画（する）? What will you do?"
"Stow away," I retorted, "in your 耐えるd!"
This, I 設立する, was Hemingway's first visit to England. How strange and sad, too, to have one's first glimpse of London in her grim 戦う／戦い dress.
My first 見解（をとる） of Newfoundland, from about five thousand feet, was of an enormous 黒人／ボイコット-and-brown land splashed with snow, like a 抱擁する chocolate cake with white icing. All around was a 静める, oily, gray sea and, 総計費, a beautiful （疑いを）晴らす, cloudless sky. We had breakfast in the cabin of the 計画（する） before we ドッキングする／減らす／ドックに入れるd. Then we went out to breathe the fresh, salty, fishy-smelling 空気／公表する, stretch our 脚s, and see the sights. The airport was 十分な of Canadian, British, and American airmen from the 計画（する）s which フェリー（で運ぶ） 刻々と 支援する and 前へ／外へ across the North 大西洋. You felt you were getting の近くに to the fighting 前線, even though several thousand miles of ocean still stretched between Newfoundland and Europe. Here, everyone was engaged, in one way or another, in getting on with the war. The little town was （人が）群がるd. People spoke 事柄-of-factly about hopping from continent to continent.
解任するing letters from England and tales of food 不足s over there, I did some 慎重な shopping and 現れるd triumphantly with a watch, which I had forgotten to get in New York, two 続けざまに猛撃するs of butter, and a dozen eggs. I tried to buy some lemons, which I knew were regarded in England as extinct, but they were extinct that day in Newfoundland also.
The 地元の paper 発表するd that the Germans were 退却／保養地ing in Italy. Good! The 侵略 of Europe was believed to be very 近づく now. And it was 報告（する）／憶測d that Roosevelt would run again. I wished my chances of 持つ／拘留するing my seat (in the 計画（する）) were as good as his.
After lunch and the arrival of the Pan-American Clipper, bringing more 乗客s bound for England, I was 保証するd there was a place for me on the 計画（する） leaving at one-fifteen. I told Ernest Hemingway:
"Your 耐えるd is now 安全な from British 侵略."
For the next eighteen hours, during eight of which I slept soundly, we flew so high, いつかs at an 高度 of eight thousand feet, that there was nothing to see but clouds. How strange was the knowledge that far below was the stretch of 投げ上げる／ボディチェックするing gray ocean I had crossed so many times since my first trip to America in 1924, when I （機の）カム over with the cast of Charlot's Revue. Strange to think that, far below us, the American and British 海軍s were patrolling those same waters to 保護する the 軍用車隊s of 輸送（する）s and 貨物船s which were plying 支援する and 前へ／外へ with men and war matériel.
Just after daylight we had our first glimpse of Ireland—lush green fields and the heather-colored mountains of Connemara with the morning もやs curling from their crests like ostrich feathers. Disturbingly 平和的な it seemed after the warlike atmosphere one felt in Newfoundland. Fat white sheep grazed placidly in the fields that 国境d the road by which we モーターd from Limerick. Several times our car slowed 負かす／撃墜する to （疑いを）晴らす the road for the herds of young beef cattle, bound (as I hoped) 結局 for England. Every letter I had had from friends at home had spoken wistfully of the past days of plenty. Though 非，不，無 of the writers complained, you read between the lines the same longing you see in children's 直面するs 圧力（をかける）d against a sweetshop window.
We took off again late that afternoon and put 負かす／撃墜する at Croydon about seven o'clock. The 船長／主将, who had 約束d me lunch in London that day, was only five hours out on his 計算／見積り.
飛行機で行くing across southern England, I wondered where Richard was and how soon I might see him. After all, I couldn't 推定する／予想する the American 海軍 to adjust its 計画（する）s to 許す one of its 中尉／大尉／警部補 指揮官s to be at Croydon to 会合，会う his wife. But, 存在 a woman, I couldn't help wishing.
In the excitement of 現実に 認めるing the big, familiar field just below us, I bounced in my seat—and 敏速に broke two of the precious eggs in my （競技場の）トラック一周.
"My God, woman," said Hemingway, helping me clean up the mess, "what are you going to do now?"
"Fortunately, I'm the same 形態／調整 前線 and 支援する," I told him. I jerked my tweed skirt around so that the egg stain was behind me, buttoned my fur coat, and 保証するd myself, as I tripped 負かす／撃墜する the gangplank, that I was making as neat an 入り口 as any in my career.
It was eight o'clock, the dinner hour, when I drove up to the dear familiar Savoy. It was not yet dark, just the beloved twilight, yet London's streets were strangely 静かな and 解放する／自由な of traffic. There were 広大な／多数の／重要な gaps in the familiar skyline and piles of がれき along the streets we drove through. All the way over I had been steeling myself for this, my first 見解（をとる） of 爆弾d London. I knew it was going to be hard to take. There was bound to be that wrenching struggle between the impulse to cry out and the feeling that one 簡単に dared not give way to one's feelings. London is my home town. I was born there in Kennington Oval. I grew up within the sound of 屈服する Bells. I spoke with a cockney accent until I was eleven or thereabouts, when 行方不明になる Italia Conti scolded and 演習d me out of it. In London I have been by turns poor and rich, 希望に満ちた and despondent, successful and 負かす／撃墜する and out, utterly 哀れな and ecstatically, dizzily happy. I belong to London as each of us can belong to only one place on this earth. And, in the same way, London belongs to me.
The windows of my room at the Savoy looked out over the Thames 堤防. After a 独房監禁 dinner, as I stood there looking 負かす／撃墜する, I had my first sharp 現実化 of what war had done to my town. An impenetrable 黒人／ボイコット curtain seemed to have fallen between me and the city. The enveloping blackness in which the 星／主役にするs seemed unreally 有望な and 近づく and the unusual, 用心深い, listening stillness were more impressive at that moment than the 破壊 wrought by the 爆弾s. They filled me with a swift, blinding fury against the enemy who could muffle the 発言する／表明する and 軍隊 of the greatest and most tolerant city in the world. Suddenly the silence 総計費 was 削減（する） by the whir of 飛行機で行くing 計画（する）s. They were our 爆撃機s starting out for 的s across the Channel. The sound carried me 支援する to World War I, when we used to be glad of nights such as this, when there was no moon to guide the Zeppelins up the winding Thames to 減少（する） their death freight on us.
On such a night...
Suddenly, as against a 黒人／ボイコット-velvet 背景, the past （機の）カム 支援する to me, and I saw myself as a little girl, dancing on a sidewalk in Clapham....
Clapham is not the least 望ましい of London's many 広範囲にわたって sprawled 地区s. Clapham is "genteel." Dwellers in other 郊外の 地区s of London speak enviously of their better-off cousins and in-法律s who are 特権d to live in Clapham, London S.W. For them—and they 含む thousands of tried-and-true Londoners—Clapham is something to aspire to.
居住（者）s of Clapham speak of these いっそう少なく-好意d boroughs with no more than the faintest tinge of 優越. For if there is one thing which every true Claphamite knows and will 断言する to, it is that 雇用 is 十分な of 不確定s and life is a 事柄 of ups and 負かす／撃墜するs. His 態度 toward the dwellers in the East End is that of the humble apostle; but for the grace of God, there go I.
Clapham has its own code, its own proper pride, and its own 堅固に rooted 条約s. For one thing, it is very bad form, indeed, to ask questions. Of course you can't help 存在 aware of 確かな facts about your neighbors: the hours they keep, who is in or out of work, whose husband spends more of his 解放する／自由な time at the corner pub than he spends with his family, and what they buy at the butcher's and greengrocer's. Good form, however, 需要・要求するs a pretense that you know 非，不，無 of these things. If one of your neighbors suddenly disappears 夜通し, 捕らえる、獲得する and baggage, you are 適切に surprised about it the next morning, even though you did hear the （強制）執行官's 発言する／表明する in the hall and the stamping made by the men from the 雇う-購入（する） company as they carried out the furniture.
If you were brought up in Clapham, as I was, you don't have to be 知らせるd of these nice points of etiquette. You grow up knowing them. "Don't be nosy," Mother would say. And Dad would 追加する: "It doesn't 支払う／賃金 to see everything, my girl."
Mother hadn't always lived in Clapham, and Kennington Oval was a step 負かす／撃墜する for her. Her father had been a master 建設業者—a man of 実体 in his own line, whose fortune, however, had been lost in "gilt-辛勝する／優位d" 安全s. Granny still lived in the same house to which she had moved as a young bride, where her children were born, and where, she stoutly 断言するd, she ーするつもりであるd, "God willing, my dear," to die. Mother had taken the step 負かす／撃墜する when she 許すd the unexplained romantic streak in her nature to make her deaf to the dictates of her class. に引き続いて that will-o'-the-wisp, she married for love with a blind 無視（する） for 経済的な 安全—married, of all things, a theatrical! And a foreigner at that. Even though he had come to England at the age of two, he was a Dane whose professional 指名する was Arthur Lawrence. He sang in a 深い, rich basso profundo, and with a 劇の fervor that went 負かす／撃墜する very 井戸／弁護士席 with audiences at smoking concerts and in the smaller music halls. He （判決などを）下すd such favorites as "Old 黒人／ボイコット Joe" and "Asleep in the 深い." His "Drinking Song" was famous throughout Brixton and Shepherd's Bush. 式のs!
Mother had been very carefully brought up. "All the time your father 法廷，裁判所d me we never once were out together after ten o'clock. I'm sure I don't know what your grandfather would have said if I had not been home and on my way to bed when the clock struck that hour."
So much decorum must have been a 広大な／多数の／重要な 緊張する on my father, accustomed as he was to the hours kept by the profession. Perhaps something in his Danish nature 答える／応じるd to this strict middle-class propriety. His family, the Klasens, were a solid, respectable lot—and he was the only one of them with a taste for anything so Bohemian as the 行う／開催する／段階.
Mother's family shook their 長，率いるs over the 未来 of such a marriage, and they were やめる 権利 about it. My father liked his glass, and an evening 献身的な to bass 単独のs gives a man a かわき. He was—as I was to learn—one of those whose personality was 完全に altered by alcohol. His gaiety, his charm, his blond good looks disappeared. He became ugly in disposition and demeanor. Mother left him soon after I was born. I grew up with no memories and no knowledge of him. But I adored Dad, my stepfather.
No wonder Granny shook her 長，率いる over Mother, who just couldn't seem to learn about men. Mother chose her two husbands for their charm, not for their ability to 供給する. Father had always been able to sing for our supper, but Dad was always 約束ing to 供給する handsomely. "Wait," he would say to us. "Just let me 支援する a 勝利者...." When he did, we would celebrate with a 非難する-up feast—boiled salmon, or a bird, toasted cheese, and a 味方する dish of prawns. And, occasionally, asparagus. The first time we had this delicacy, I remember, Mother 削減（する） off all the green tips and boiled the white stalks.
Gertrude Alexandra Dagmar Lawrence Klasen—little Gertie Lawrence to you—was やめる 満足させるd with Kennington Oval. For one thing, the 組織／臓器-grinder （機の）カム there frequently and would pause and grind out a tune on each 味方する of the Oval, which gave the 居住（者）s a fair-sized concert. I never could resist him, nor could I learn to be a proper child and 満足させる myself with 開始 the window a 割れ目 to let the music come into the room.
"Where is that child?" Mother would ask. One look from the window was enough. There I was, に引き続いて the music, 持つ／拘留するing out my 簡潔な／要約する skirts and dancing to what I hoped was the 賞賛 of the neighbors.
Nobody that I know of had taught me to dance. The steps just seemed to come to me the minute my ears caught the music. But Mother loved "musical evenings," and my first song, learned from a sheet of 解放する／自由な music 削減（する） from a newspaper, went like this:
Oh, it ain't all honey, and it ain't all jam,
Walking 一連の会議、交渉／完成する the 'ouses with a three-wheel pram,
All on me lonesome, not a bit to eat,
Walking about on me poor old feet.
My old man, if I could find 'im,
A lesson I would give.
Poor old me, I 'aven't got a 重要な,
And I don't know where I live.
にわか景気! にわか景気!
Whenever we had company, on a Sunday night, I would be made to 強いる with a song. "Gertie's such a funny one!" Dad would puff out his chest, proud of my 業績／成就.
"Fancy! A child her age singing songs like that!"
"Whatever will she do next? She せねばならない go on the 行う／開催する／段階. She's got it in her."
That song brought me the first money I ever earned. The summer I was six Dad must have had a streak of unusual good luck with the horses because he took Mother and me to Bognor Regis for the bank holiday. It was boiling hot, I remember, and the sands were （人が）群がるd. I had never been to the sea before; the bathers, the picnic parties on the sand, the strollers along the 前線 fascinated me. A concert party was entertaining, and Dad paid for us to go in. At the の近くに of the 正規の／正選手 法案 the "funny man" （機の）カム 今後 and 招待するd anyone in the audience who cared to, to come up on the 行う／開催する／段階 and entertain the （人が）群がる. A 押し進める from Mother and the 命令（する）: "Go on now, Gertie, and sing your song," was all the 勧めるing I needed. "It ain't all honey, and it ain't all jam," I caroled lightly, twirling on my toes with my skimpy pink frock held out as far as it would stretch. The 賞賛 and the 元気づけるs were gratifying, even without the large golden 君主 which the 経営者／支配人 現在のd to me after a little speech.
I know I must have told this story to Noel Coward. No 疑問 I 誇るd of it when we were both pupils at 行方不明になる Conti's dancing school. The 出来事/事件 may have given him the idea for one of the scenes in Cavalcade. In fact, when I saw the play, there was something so familiar about that little girl doing her song and dance on the Brighton sands, the little girl who grew up to be an actress, that I felt a 急ぐ of 涙／ほころびs and a choke in my throat. She made me remember, suddenly, so many things I thought I had forgotten.
One other thing makes that holiday at Bognor Regis stand out in my mind. We were living in lodgings, of course. Late one Sunday afternoon Mother told Dad to take me for a walk along the 前線 while she got our supper ready. Dad and I walked about for a bit, enjoying the （人が）群がるs; then I noticed that his steps began to drag and he began to cast longing 注目する，もくろむs at the saloon doors from which, now that they were open again, （機の）カム the 冷静な／正味の, sour smell of beer. Finally, he could stand it no longer.
"Sit 負かす／撃墜する on that （法廷の）裁判, Gertie," he said. "You can have a nice look at the sea and the people going by. Be a good girl, now, and don't move until I come 支援する for you."
I watched him disappear in the direction of the nearest 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業. I was not disconcerted. Obediently I sat on the （法廷の）裁判, swinging my 脚s and enjoying my freedom. Even more than the sea and the （人が）群がる, I was 利益／興味d in a stand where a 調印する 発表するd bicycles for 雇う. That drew me as 必然的に as the saloon had drawn Dad.
"How much does it cost to 雇う a bike?" I asked the attendant
"Sixpence an hour, my dear."
I felt around in my coat pocket and produced the coin. The attendant looked at me a bit doubtfully, but the sixpence was real enough and there in the rack was a bike just my size. He took it out and 解除するd me up on the saddle.
"That will do you a fair 扱う／治療する," he said. "Now be sure you bring it 支援する in an hour." He turned away to wait on another 顧客.
I wheeled the machine proudly across the 前線 and 負かす／撃墜する a street into a 三日月 where the railings in 前線 of the houses gave me something to 持つ／拘留する の上に. I had never been on a cycle before, but I had no 疑問 of my ability to ride one. I leaned it against the railing, 支払う／賃金ing no attention to the 調印する which read, "Fresh Paint," 機動力のある it, and, 持つ／拘留するing の上に the railing with one 手渡す, managed to pedal around the 三日月. It was thrilling, like riding a circus horse around the （犯罪の）一味, and there was always the 可能性 that the people were watching me from the windows of the houses. I fell off several times, skinned my 膝, and got the 前線 of my frock grubby while the 味方する toward the railings became ornamented with （土地などの）細長い一片s of green paint, but I kept at it, getting better with each （競技場の）トラック一周. I had forgotten Dad and Mother, even the admonition of the attendant at the bicycle stand to be 支援する within an hour.
It was getting dusk before Dad 設立する me, a frantic, red-直面するd, 脅すd Dad, who had already spent some time running up and 負かす／撃墜する the 前線 calling, "Gertie! Gertie!" and 需要・要求するing of everyone, "Have you seen my little girl anywhere about?"
His 救済 at sight of me was すぐに transformed into 怒り／怒る for the fright I had 原因（となる）d him. "Now, then, whatever have you been up to? You'd せねばならない be ashamed of yourself running off like that! Such a fright you've given me! Whatever would I have said to your mother? She won't half give you a piece of her mind when she sees what you've done to your frock! And it's your poor dad will get the worst of it."
He went on, muttering and scolding, all the way 支援する to the bicycle stand where he paid the attendant for the over-time. And still clutching me by the 手渡す, as though afraid I would 消える again, he hurried me 支援する to our lodgings. We were nearly there when he stopped, 除去するd his hat, and wiped his brow. Giving me a long look that すぐに 設立するd a 信用／信任 between us, he 発言／述べるd 試験的に, "I don't know. How would it be if we were to take your mother a little gin and bitters to have with her supper?"
I nodded 是認.
"Wait here, then. And 非，不，無 of your 消えるing 行為／法令／行動するs, my girl!"
He stepped jauntily into the convenient door of a refreshment 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業. After a few minutes he 現れるd, wiping his mustache and looking very much more like himself. He patted one bulging pocket: "Your mother always did fancy a gin and bitters. Your mother's a wonderful woman, Gertie. Don't you ever forget it!"
No, I 約束d myself. Somehow or other I felt that I now had two 同盟（する）s against Mother's 怒り／怒る when she discovered the 明言する／公表する of my dress. Dad, I felt, would be on my 味方する and could be counted on to bring up the 増強s—すなわち the gin and bitters—at the psychological moment.
Dad's 賞賛 for Mother was unbounded, and his devotion was as 広大な／多数の／重要な as his 賞賛. Whenever they had a 争い, he would feel moved to tell me solemnly that it was all his fault. He 高く評価する／（相場などが）上がるd Mother's 罰金 質s, and he would lecture me on the 支配する of showing the same 評価.
"Mind you always do as your mother tells you to, my girl. Your mother's a wonderful woman. Just you try to be like her, and you won't go far wrong."
There was nothing sentimental about Mother, nor about her 決意 to bring me up によれば her 基準s. She saw to it that I （機の）カム straight home from school each day and that I did the 世帯 仕事s that were 割り当てるd to me. One of these was 黒人／ボイコットing the 解雇する／砲火／射撃 grates. As Mother said, there was something about a 井戸／弁護士席-黒人／ボイコットd grate that gave a room an 空気／公表する. It may be that this helped her 意気込み／士気 and 補償するd for some of the 不安定 of her life with Dad. Each of us has some sort of pet fetish, something we 粘着する to which gives us self-信用／信任 and 力／強力にする to go on. A neat, 井戸／弁護士席-黒人／ボイコットd fireplace was Mother's. If she had 黒人／ボイコットd the grates herself, she would have 行方不明になるd the satisfaction of feeling that she was bringing up her daughter in the proper tradition. So I 黒人／ボイコットd the grates each day. And on Saturdays I did the 厚かましさ／高級将校連 and helped in general.
It was not sentimentality but a 猛烈な／残忍な pride for herself and for Dad that made Mother put me into ruffled frocks which were a bother to make and to wash and アイロンをかける. And what a nuisance they were for me to keep clean! It seemed as though some mischievous 運命／宿命 led me into trouble as soon as I was sent out, freshly bathed and dressed, with strict orders to "walk around the pond and try to 行為／法令／行動する like a lady." It wasn't that I deliberately tried to misbehave, but that life would not let me follow Mother's 命令（する）. It would 持つ／拘留する out some other 誘導 to me, something I could not 辞退する. Before I knew it I would be engaged in sailing boats on the pond, getting wetter and muddier every minute, or making friends with some 逸脱する mongrel puppy whose playful paws had no regard for my starched ruffles.
"Why can't you be like your cousin Ruby!" Mother would scold.
My cousin was all that I was not—she was a plump, pretty, neat child with curls hanging to her waist; my hair was lank and as straight as a die. My cousin Ruby was always spotless and without a wrinkle. Her nails were clean. She was the pride of the family, and she knew it. Her father, my mother's brother, was in 告発（する），告訴（する）／料金 of the 王室の Stables at Buckingham Palace, which gave Ruby a prestige. "Just look at your cousin," Mother would say. "She is such a credit to her parents, it's a 楽しみ to watch her come into a room. Here I spend hours on making you look nice and it lasts until you're out of sight. I 宣言する, Gertie, you've got the very devil in you."
I think Mother always regretted losing the world in which she had lived 簡潔に with my father—the world of the theater. In a わずかに discolored mother-of-pearl card 事例／患者 she treasured a number of visiting cards of actresses she had known in those days. いつかs, as a 扱う／治療する, she would let me play with them. I would pull a card out of the 事例／患者, read the 指名する aloud, and she would すぐに 開始する，打ち上げる into the story of how she and the owner of the card met and where, what her specialty was, and Mother's own opinion of how good she was at it. This parlor game gave me my first inside （警察などへの）密告，告訴（状） on the theatrical profession. One of the things I learned was that Friday was "professional night" at most of the theaters. On Friday night it was usual to 収容する／認める members of the profession 解放する／自由な. By the time I was eight or nine, I had learned the trick of 令状ing neatly across the 直面する of any one of the cards, "Please give my little girl two seats." If Mother was out that evening, I would take the card, call for one of my little girl friends, and together we would take the tram to Brixton or any 近づく-by 地区 where there was a theater. I would 現在の myself and my card at the box office. The man would look through the wicket at me a little doubtfully, その結果 I would put on my most innocent and pleading look. Usually someone hanging about would say: "Oh, give the kids a couple of seats." We would skip in and find places in the gallery.
After the show we would take the tram home, hoping 猛烈に to get there before our mothers 設立する us out. Once, I remember, either the tram was 延期するd or Mother （機の）カム home from Granny's earlier than usual. She 設立する the other little girl's mother 大打撃を与えるing at our door.
"Your Gertie （機の）カム and took my Mabel!" she cried.
"They're not 支援する yet."
Mother did not put off whipping me to ask too many questions. After the 罰, she began to 問い合わせ into our evening. What shocked her most of all was our riding to and from Brixton on the tram.
"Did you speak to anyone?" she 需要・要求するd.
"A gentleman spoke to me."
"How do you know he was a gentleman?" Mother asked suspiciously.
"Because he was wearing a gold watch and chain!"
Strangely, this seemed to 満足させる her as 完全に as it had 満足させるd me.
The rooms on Kennington Oval 示すd the high tide of our 財政／金融s. We lived there only as long as luck was with Dad. Then we moved, as we frequently did. There was a 正規の／正選手 ritual connected with these movings which 変化させるd only as we moved up or 負かす／撃墜する in the 経済的な 規模. If the move was occasioned by good fortune, Mother 追加するd a piano to the furniture she ordered sent around to the new 演説（する）／住所. There was something undeniably genteel about a piano in the house, even if no one could play it.
If the move was in the other direction, a 先頭 drove up and men smelling of sawdust and beer carried away the piano and the 残り／休憩（する） of the furniture which we had on the 雇う-購入（する） 計画（する）. They were やめる impersonal about it; they gave you to understand that their orders to take away the （米）棚上げする／（英）提議するs and 議長，司会を務めるs and the sideboard with the mirror at the 支援する （機の）カム from the company. Mother was always on her dignity with them. She 辞退するd to be commiserated with. In her own way she contrived to 暗示する a disdain for the 世帯 chattels over which there was such an unaccountable to-do. The impersonal 空気／公表する with which she watched the men from the 雇う Furniture Company stagger 負かす／撃墜する the 前線 steps under the pseudo-Jacobean ガス／煙d-oak dresser was a 勝利 of 劇の genius. As the rooms became emptier, you felt that Mother was 単に （疑いを）晴らすing her decks for bolder 活動／戦闘, and that when we had furniture again, it would be on a nobler, more elegant 規模.
一方／合間 Dad would have slipped '一連の会議、交渉／完成する the corner and entered into 交渉s with the 近隣 greengrocer whose account had been paid up and whose friendship could therefore be relied upon. Not until after dark, when there would be no 調査するing 注目する，もくろむs, would Mother take 負かす／撃墜する the window curtains and pack the few 所有／入手s rightfully our own and which remained constant through all the changes for better or for worse—the bedding, though not the beds, the kitchen マリファナs and pans, the square 黒人／ボイコット marble-and-gilt clock with the 人物／姿／数字 of Britannia 残り／休憩（する）ing on her 保護物，者 星／主役にするing pensively at a beast which 似ているd a poodle more than a lion, the pair of gaily-flowered 王室の Worcester vases which always 側面に位置するd the clock above every hearth we gathered 一連の会議、交渉／完成する, and a red glass 襲う，襲って強奪する engraved with the date of Queen Victoria's Jubilee.
の近くに on to midnight the grocer's boy would arrive with his cart. Dad would tiptoe 負かす／撃墜する the stairs with the 小包s and baskets and pile them on the cart while the boy leaned against the railing and kept a 警戒／見張り for "Nosy Parkers." In all this there was nothing 初めの; we were 単に に引き続いて a tradition long 認めるd in Clapham and in other いっそう少なく-好意d 地区s. This 作戦行動 was known in the vernacular as a "moonlight flit." 明白に, it was a move to cheaper lodgings in another 地区 where we and our straitened circumstances were as yet unknown. Also, 明白に, it was without the landlord's knowledge.
There must have been families whose moonlight flits were sad and shamefaced. Not ours. There was something daring and whimsical about this sort of move which challenged all that was adventurous in our three natures. Each of us 答える／応じるd to the challenge 異なって; each in his own way.
Mother always dressed up to the nines for the occasion. She would skewer her largest birded hat 頂上に her puffs, twine a marabou boa elegantly about her neck, and draw on a pair of long, worn, but carefully mended gray gloves. Catching up her skirt with one 手渡す and carrying the tea-kettle in the other, she would sweep 負かす／撃墜する the stairs with a dignity calculated to overpower any lurking landlord.
In Dad, jauntiness rose over dignity. He would cock his bowler at an angle, and thumbs in the armholes of his waistcoat, he would chaff the grocer's boy, making him a partner in the adventure.
At a signal from Dad the boy would 押し進める off with his cart, Dad would gallantly 申し込む／申し出 Mother his arm, and they would follow. I would bring up the 後部 of the little 行列. So we moved through Clapham's silent streets, 開拓するs setting 前へ／外へ into the unknown to start a new home in a new and untried land. The adventure tingled in my toes. Where the moon or a street lamp splashed the pavement with light, my feet would begin to dance....
The sun was 向こうずねing when I opened my 注目する，もくろむs on my first morning glimpse of London. すぐに things began to happen. Phones rang, flowers arrived, photographers snapped cameras at me, and the 圧力（をかける） began asking how it felt to be home again after six years "in the 明言する／公表するs."
I could tell them in one word: wonderful.
All that day and through the week that followed, lunching, teaing, and dining with old friends, 適用するing to the proper bureaus for ration cards, gas mask, tin hat (やめる fetching when worn at just the 権利 攻撃する), and a 国家の Service 許す to enter 制限するd areas, I was discovering and making 知識 with a London that was strange to me.
I thought I knew London in every possible mood—gay and handsome and smart and ceremonious as she was during the 載冠（式）／即位（式） summer of 1937—I was there for that brilliant high tide of midsummer pomp. 公式に I was "残り／休憩（する）ing" while Rachel Crothers rewrote and polished Susan and God. 現実に, I was entertaining myself and 存在 entertained by the gayest season London had had in many years and the last she was to see for a long time to come. During those weeks, when the old city was washed and 小衝突d and bedecked, like a doting grandmother for the marriage of a favorite grandson, all of us drank 深い of our 楽しみ. Perhaps we had a premonition of what lay just ahead. Anyway, that London of 1937 （機の）カム the closest to Edwardian London of any other season since World War I.
いつか before I was there playing in Tonight at 8:30. All that season there was a hush over England; people spoke softly, nobody made 計画（する）s. Everyone waited for the 公式発表s which gave us news of the King's 条件. You felt the 切迫した passing of an 時代. I had a small 無線で通信する in my dressing room at the theater and would turn it on between 行為／法令／行動するs to 選ぶ up the news from the B.B.C. The news, to everyone in England that year, meant one thing—news of the King.
One night when we knew the King was very low, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr., was in my dressing room waiting for the final curtain. When I （機の）カム off the 行う／開催する／段階 and into the dressing room, the 無線で通信する was tuned in and I didn't need to ask questions. Douglas' 直面する told me that the last 公式発表 had not held out much hope. Very quickly I changed, and Douglas and I took a taxi to Buckingham Palace. It was impossible to get の近くに, because the 商店街 and all the wide space in 前線 of the gates were （人が）群がるd. Thousands of Londoners and people up from the country were packed shoulder to shoulder in a silent, motionless 集まり. We joined the others and waited.
I remember seeing Claire Luce, in a 有望な scarlet coat, wedged into the （人が）群がる. She was then playing in Gay Deceivers, and she had come just as she stepped off the 行う／開催する／段階, even with her make-up on.
There was nothing one could do, but somehow there was no other place one 手配中の，お尋ね者 to be at that moment. Every ４半期/4分の1 of an hour or so someone （機の）カム out of the palace and 地位，任命するd a new 公式発表 on the board fastened to the gates. Then the whole （人が）群がる moved 今後 as one man. The two or three in a position to read the typewritten notice passed the word 支援する. The message rippled through the （人が）群がる: "The King is 沈むing." I held on very tight to Douglas' arm and he to 地雷. We were 噂するd as 存在 engaged, but just then and there personal 関係s did not count for much.
Presently a new notice was put on the board. Again that 緊急の sweep 今後 of the （人が）群がる, like the tide 押し進めるing its way into a cove. But this time there was no ripple or whisper. Silently those in the 前線 階級 stepped 支援する and 除去するd their hats; then from the （人が）群がる as from one man there rose a 選び出す／独身 sigh.
We were wedged too の近くに to turn. I was squeezed between Douglas and another very tall young man. I saw him sweep off his hat. There were 涙／ほころびs running 負かす／撃墜する his cheeks.
"井戸／弁護士席, I guess that's that," he said. His 発言する／表明する told me he was an American.
The words wrote an end to a 一時期／支部.
The big event of my first day was getting in touch with Richard. He phoned he could get leave and asked me to come 負かす／撃墜する and 会合，会う him at his base the next day, which was Saturday. We arranged that I would take the nine-thirty train from Waterloo. I arrived at the 駅／配置する a good half-hour beforehand only to be told the train had been 取り消すd in the night. As no one seemed to think this was unusual, I got the impression that train schedules were pretty uncertain things even though the traffic was 述べるd as normal. I went 支援する to the hotel and filled in time until I should start for the next train, which was scheduled to leave at eleven-thirty. However, I 許すd myself plenty of time and took up my stand at gate No. 10 as the 駅／配置する guard had 教えるd me to do. There were so few people standing there I thought I was in luck, but this 楽観主義 was すぐに 粉々にするd by a 発言する／表明する from the loudspeaker which 発表するd: "乗客s waiting for the eleven-thirty to Portsmouth will please join the 列s by the boards 示すd '5' and '6.'" Before these gates stretched two 明らかに endless 列s, one made up of servicemen—British, American, Canadian; the other, of 非軍事のs. I 追加するd myself to the tail of the latter 列 and waited with what patience I could 召集（する）. Slowly the 行列 shuffled a few steps nearer the still-distant gate. I kept my 注目する，もくろむ on my Newfoundland watch while my hopes of joining Richard that day evaporated. At eleven-thirty the 発言する／表明する spoke again: "The eleven-thirty is now 十分な. The twelve forty-five has been 取り消すd. The next train leaves at one-thirty."
I dropped out of line and 始める，決める about planning a （選挙などの）運動をする. I dashed 支援する to the 近づく-by Savoy, where I changed into my American Red Cross uniform; then I returned to Waterloo 駅／配置する and 肘d my way into the 列 with the 武装した 軍隊s. After standing in line an hour and a half, I 設立する a place on the one-thirty train.
It was やめる an experience, but 価値（がある） it. Richard met me. After many months of service overseas, he, 明らかに, was やめる philosophic about trains which do not run and, when they do, cannot 融通する all of the 乗客s. We had a lovely day together and I returned to London the next morning. I was still wearing my Red Cross uniform and having lunch in the Savoy 取調べ／厳しく尋問する when who should come along but Basil Dean. He 星／主役にするd at me.
"What are you doing in that uniform, Gertie?"
I explained. その結果 he 命令（する）d me to go at once and be fitted for an E.N.S.A. uniform. Having known Basil since I was a child when he "managed" me, I meekly obeyed.
At first there seemed to be a 広大な／多数の／重要な 取引，協定 of hush-hush about the 部隊 to which I was to be 割り当てるd, where we were to go, and—most important of all—when we were to start. All I could find out was that we were 長，率いるd for an eight-weeks 小旅行する of 広大な／多数の／重要な Britain, during which we would be called on to give three shows a day, with a lot of モーターing between shows.
Rehearsals were called in one of the 地下組織の cellars of Drury 小道／航路 Theatre, which had been 爆弾d during the blitz, but which was still the E.N.S.A. （警察，軍隊などの）本部.
At the first rehearsal I learned that ours was to be known as The Gertrude Lawrence 部隊, a tremendous 栄誉（を受ける） and one which made me feel a bit shy and self-conscious, 特に as the others in the 部隊 had all been together since the 開始 of E.N.S.A. But the ice was quickly broken over a couple of beers, and soon everyone was talking shop as プロの／賛成のs do when and wherever they get together.
The only 非，不，無-professional の中で us was Mary Barrett, whose position in the 部隊 was that of shepherd, 経営者／支配人, confidential 助言者, trouble-shooter, and 護衛. Surely, that should give her professional 率ing. Mary had been Gracie Fields' 長官-companion when Gracie was in England, and その結果 knew the ropes. She could improvise a 衣装 at the last minute if the wardrobe trunks failed to turn up. With equal 技術 and 速度(を上げる）, she could contrive to cook a supper over a gas （犯罪の）一味 out of whatever the shops or the rations 申し込む／申し出d. She had the soothing tact of a career 外交官 and the adroitness of a 区 政治家，政治屋. No one ever heard her grouse or complain of weariness, 欠如（する） of sleep, or even the temperament of our performers.
We put on our first show and a big B.B.C. broadcast at a factory in Ilford on the 郊外s of London for twenty-five hundred 労働者s. The 工場／植物 turned out 無線で通信する parts for 計画（する）s and was working at 十分な 生産／産物 速度(を上げる）. The show gave me a chance to try out some of the songs I had brought over from America, but while I realized that these factory 労働者s were doing a tremendously important 職業, にもかかわらず it was the 軍隊／機動隊s I had come over to sing to. I was impatient to start our 小旅行する of the （軍の）野営地，陣営s.
一方／合間, during the week of waiting, I was discovering more things about the British people than I had ever thought about before.
I heard very little talk about the war. In fact, I rather got the idea no one was 推定する／予想するd to talk about it. Perhaps this was because everyone—men and women—was doing some sort of war service. Everybody had to do 解雇する／砲火／射撃 watching on the roofs. Nobody whined about the servant problem, because there weren't any servants to whine about. A maid might be 許すd to a 世帯 in which a 確かな number of persons were billeted. さもなければ people were cooking their own meals and making a practice of eating out whenever possible. Shopping took endless time. I saw Londoners of every social class 列ing up for hours in 前線 of the fish shops. The streets were 十分な of bicycles. Everyone cycled to and from his 職業. The boots that 圧力（をかける）d the pedals were patched on the 単独のs, but they were 井戸／弁護士席 polished. This meant that the wearer had done the polishing himself. That below-stairs character so dear to Dickens and to the writers and illustrators of Punch—I mean the British "boots"—had joined up, or was making 軍需品s.
People looked very fit, 特に the women, most of whom were in some sort of uniform—the WRENS, ATS, Red Cross, et cetera. Everyone was busy all the time, but there was no 急ぐ or excitement. No one was breathless. You felt that without 審議する／熟考する 成果／努力 or any bravado everyone was carrying on the accustomed pattern of life as 終始一貫して as possible.
London was 十分な of American 特派員s. They kept popping up wherever you went. Allan Michie, who was （売買）手数料，委託（する）／委員会／権限d to cover the 侵略 for the Reader's Digest, Liebling of the New Yorker, Hemingway on an assignment for Collier's, and several others I ran into, were ガス／煙ing because word had gone around that they would not be 許すd to go across with the British 軍隊s. General Eisenhower had 明らかに given 許可, but some 連絡事務 officer on the staff said there was no room for them, so they were muttering and 悪口を言う／悪態ing. I was a 同情的な listener. I heard many accounts of the 早期に days of the 戦う／戦い of Britain. For instance, there was the story that during the 早期に days of home-guard training the men were given beer 瓶／封じ込めるs—three apiece—filled with some 肉親，親類d of 穏やかな 爆発性の. With these homemade 手りゅう弾s they were 推定する／予想するd to knock out the German 戦車／タンクs as they 前進するd up the beaches. These were like the famous "Molotov Cocktails."
Things were different now. 軍需品s in more formidable 量s were 存在 turned out by the war 工場／植物s for the 侵略 of Europe. Ernest Byfield, 事実上の／代理 as war 特派員 for the Hearst 圧力（をかける）, told me it took ten thousand pairs of nylon stockings to make one towrope for a glider 計画（する）, and at least a thousand gliders are needed for an 空気／公表する-borne 侵略. "That should be broadcast to the 黒人／ボイコット-market shoppers in America and どこかよそで."
I agreed.
"When peace comes, instead of （警官の）巡回区域，受持ち区域ing swords into plowshares, I suppose we will 変える our towropes into stockings."
"And our tin hats into ash trays," I 追加するd.
We laughed about it, but, 現実に, we had learned the British way of thinking, which is that, no 事柄 how the war is going, and in spite of the changes it 課すs on everybody, the day will 必然的に come when the 設立するd, comfortable, 平和的な life, which every British person considers no more than his 予定, will return.
I was made aware of this 国家の psychology the evening I went to dine with Daisy Neame in Eaton Square. On my way there I passed a 調印する which read: "Horse 避難所." That is something I am sure could 存在する only in 広大な／多数の／重要な Britain. I spoke of it at dinner and was told that the 規則s regarding the 治療 of animals during 空襲s were very strict. When the 警報 sounds, horses must be unharnessed すぐに from carts and led to 指定するd places of 避難所 before the driver takes cover.
Of course horses are 価値のある, 特に during the 不足 of 石油. Somehow one also feels behind those horse 避難所s the 冒険的な instincts of the British, 同様に as the indomitable humanitarianism of all those tender-hearted ladies who used to 令状 letters to the Times regarding the 治療 of animals. It would take a lot more than the German blitz to 少なくなる the British sense of 責任／義務 toward horses, dogs, cats, birds, and even donkeys.
The war has altered some 面s of British life unbelievably. Daisy's door was opened by her husband Lionel. Butlers have become extinct, even in Eaton Square. Everything was as I remembered it except for three unusual 乗り物s standing in the hall. These were the two bicycles on which Lionel and Daisy pedal to their 各々の war 職業s. The third was the baby's pram which Daisy told me she wheeled herself, to give the 幼児 an 公表／放送, when she went out to do the marketing. Another 革新 in Mayfair. The British "nannies" in their 訂正する gray uniforms and caps with ゆらめくing streamers have been blitzed out of London's life.
When we went in to dinner the （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する looked just as lovely as usual. The silver had the wonderful blue sheen that comes only from たびたび（訪れる） vigorous polishings. The damask was lustrous, and the 装飾／要点 of 激しい-長，率いるd tulips was like a cluster of glowing jewels. The men, of course, were in uniform. Daisy and I wore short 黒人／ボイコット dresses. Yes, it was all almost 戦前の. But one thing was 行方不明の—there were no servants to wait on us.
When we had finished the first course, "Here we go," said Daisy, rising and 主要な the way to the sideboard. She slid 支援する the shutter of a little window she had had 削減（する） in the 塀で囲む between the dining room and the service pantry. Daisy went around into the pantry and received the plates each of us passed to her through the window; then she 手渡すd us plates with the next course, which we carried 支援する to the （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する and proceeded to eat with enjoyment. Daisy had cooked the food herself, and I must say she had done a very good 職業.
I 設立する a tremendous 利益／興味 in America—a 本物の curiosity about what Americans thought, what they were doing, and how they felt about the British. Everything sent from the U.S.A. had become extraordinarily 価値のある and 望ましい. I don't suppose that at any time since the 統治する of James I, when the first British 植民地s were 設立するd in America, has the world beyond the 大西洋 held out such riches as it does today.
The British are rediscovering America.
Later, thinking over the things I had seen going about London, I began to ask myself why I took this imperturbability without surprise. Because I wasn't surprised by it at all. Somehow or other, 深い 負かす／撃墜する in me, was the knowledge that of course these people would 行為／法令／行動する in 正確に／まさに this way. What would have surprised me would have been to find them changing their manner of living, forsaking their ideals of 行為 and their 基準s of what is pleasant, enjoyable, and 価値（がある） while; and doing this at the 割れ目 of Herr Hitler's whip.
Inherently and instinctively I knew these things about the British people because I had known and loved Granny. Though her life was lived a very long 石／投石する's throw from Mayfair, Granny, にもかかわらず, was a perfect personification of the British character. She 代表するd the backbone of the nation.
"示す my words, Alice, the child has talent."
Whenever Granny said "示す my words," she became the family oracle, to be heard and 注意するd with 尊敬（する）・点.
She spoke composedly, continuing to 激しく揺する in her wheel-支援する armchair with her feet 残り／休憩（する）ing on the 厚かましさ／高級将校連 fender rail, while her knitting needles clicked without 中止するing.
I have no way of knowing just when Granny decided that I was 運命にあるd for the theater. She and Grandfather, whom I 主として remember because he 苦しむd from a 病気 called chalky gout, had 堅固に disapproved of their daughter Alice's 同盟 with the profession. Perhaps they 受託するd the fact that the offspring of that unfortunate union was doomed from the moment of conception, and could not, therefore, be held 支援する from her dark 運命. At any 率, I never remember Granny putting up any 反対s to my 率直に 表明するd ambition to go on the 行う／開催する／段階.
To tell the truth, she encouraged me. Whenever I stayed with her we would play theater. The program started with me coming through the sitting-room door to 屈服する to her as the audience and make my 開始 speech which began: "Ladies and gentlemen, I am about to appear." I would then disappear and get dressed up for the 業績／成果.
During those 早期に years, when our family 財政／金融s went up and 負かす／撃墜する with the nervousness of a 晴雨計 during a September equinox, Granny 代表するd 安全, 安定, and 保証／確信,
The 安定 was to be 設立する in her cozy little sitting room in Sandmere Road with its crocheted antimacassars on the 議長，司会を務めるs and the embroidered lambrequin draped along the mantelshelf. A pair of 磁器 Staffordshire dogs—white with red splotches—stood guard on either 味方する of the over-mantel mirror.
The large gilt-でっちあげる，人を罪に陥れるd engraving hanging above the horsehair sofa, showing Queen Victoria and the Prince Consort surrounded by their progeny, was 側面に位置するd by a 類似して でっちあげる，人を罪に陥れるd engraving of King Edward and Queen Alexandra. All my life, since those 早期に days in Granny's sitting room, I have looked upon Queen Victoria as a most 驚くべき／特命の／臨時の woman; one who 明らかに, without the 援助（する） of hatpins or elastic, could balance a small, teetery 栄冠を与える on 最高の，を越す of her 滑らかに 小衝突d 長，率いる at the same time as she dandled an obese 幼児 on her satin-draped 膝.
Granny was a 地雷 of （警察などへの）密告，告訴（状） 関心ing the 王室の Family. Their births, marriages, 載冠（式）／即位（式）s, widowings, and deaths 供給するd her with constant and 制限のない romance and 演劇. The British 王室の Family belonged to her, as if they were a very superior family of paper dolls. Whenever I went to see Granny, I would ask her about the different members of the 王室の Family, and she would tell me, confidentially, all the 最新の goings-on. I was under the impression that Granny was very much in the know about whatever happened at Buckingham Palace, Windsor, or Sandringham which was summed up in the impressive words "at 法廷，裁判所."
A Bible and a worn 黒人／ボイコット leather 調書をとる／予約する of ありふれた 祈り were always on the little （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する beside Granny's bed in her bedroom, where everything smelled of Pears' Soap and lavender water. These 代表するd the second article of Granny's 約束; for if article one of her simple creed was her 信用 in the 栄冠を与える, article two was her unquestioned 約束 in the Church of England.
Granny's 尊敬（する）・点 for these two 会・原則s was 設立するd upon her 平等に categorical 尊敬（する）・点 for herself and her class. So long as she did her 義務 toward her King on high and toward her King here below, she had every 権利 to 推定する／予想する 明言する／公表する and Church to do their 義務 toward her. There was no subservience in Granny's 態度 toward king or bishop. She 簡単に paid them the 尊敬（する）・点 予定 the dignity of their positions, and in return she 推定する／予想するd the 明言する／公表する to give her 安全 in this life, and the Church to 勧める her into a seat on the 権利 手渡す of the Lord in the next.
Frequently on Sunday evenings I would go to church with her, carrying her prayerbook and finding the hymns from the numerals put up on the hymn boards beside the chancel. Granny and I 株d the hymnbook, and our 発言する／表明するs—hers still 甘い, but a little husky and いつかs off 重要な, 地雷 higher, steadier, and a 完全にする imitation of the boys' in the choir—would 部隊 in the hymns and psalms which we both enjoyed immensely.
Many of the hymns were puzzling to me, and not a few of them seemed rather 汚い with their 言及／関連s to sweat, 負傷させるs, and 血. How amazing that Granny, who had very strict ideas about what was and what was not nice, could still warble piously:
"There is a place where Jesus sheds宗教, I thought, was certainly a very rum 商売／仕事. Take the word "血まみれの," for instance. What made this word やめる proper in church and 許すことの出来ない in ordinary conversation?
The oil of gladness on our 長，率いるs;
A place than all besides more 甘い:
It is the 血-bought mercy seat."
いつかs when Granny's rheumatism got the better of her piety, she would send me to church as her 代表者／国会議員. Then I would be ゆだねるd with the prayerbook and a sixpence for the offertory, tucked into the palm of my white cotton glove.
When I returned, Granny would ask expectantly: "井戸／弁護士席, my dear, what was the sermon like? And what was the text?"
に引き続いて this lead, I would turn a 議長，司会を務める around to form a pulpit and proceed to 配達する a digest of the vicar's 発言／述べるs for her 評価. Of course it was necessary to dress up for this in Grandfather's coat and one of his collars, both worn 支援する to 前線 to give me a clerical look. I must say I think I did the part of the reverend gentleman rather 井戸／弁護士席, though I 改善するd on his gestures and dramatized his style of 配達／演説／出産. Keeping in character, I would sing the hymns for Granny—not always those which we had sung at the service, but others which were my favorites.
After service Granny and I would have a cup of tea, and then, feeling relaxed and ready for a bit of amusement after all this edification, she would encourage me to sing for her songs she had taught me: "The Man Who Broke the Bank at Monte Carlo," "She's Only a Bird in a Gilded Cage," and "シャンペン酒 Charlie Is Me 指名する." For this 行為／法令／行動する Grandfather's coat and collar were readjusted, his bowler hat and walking stick were produced, and the show was on.
Granny's 率直に 表明するd preference was for little girls who were plump and rosy-checked. Tall, thin, sallow children looked half 餓死するd to her, and, therefore, she worried over my natural gawkiness.
"The child needs fattening up, Alice. Look at her. She's all 脚s."
"She's growing 急速な／放蕩な, Mother. I have to keep letting 負かす／撃墜する the hems of her dresses until there is no more stuff to let out."
Granny 匂いをかぐd. "It's the Danish 血, I 推定する／予想する. The Danish princes are all over six feet. And Her Majesty is 極端に tall; though a 罰金 人物／姿／数字 of a woman, of course."
I preened to this. "Her Majesty" meant Queen Alexandra. I felt I had a special 株 in Her Majesty, who had come from Denmark, my father's country, and after whom I had been 指名するd.
Granny's next 発言／述べる, however, dashed my self-esteem. "She's sallow too. I never did like a puny child. Some Scott's Emulsion would do her good. 示す my words, Alice, you'd do 井戸／弁護士席 to get a 瓶／封じ込める and give her a spoonful night and morning."
"Very 井戸／弁護士席, Mother. If you think so."
I loathed Scott's Emulsion, I gagged over each spoonful of the beastly stuff; but I knew better than to 反逆者／反逆する. I had heard Granny's orders. So I was brought up on Scott's Emulsion to fatten me up, camphorated oil for my constant chest 冷淡なs, and Parrish's 化学製品 Food, which was supposed to be a tonic. But I was no 宣伝 for all or any of these 治療（薬）s, and Granny would sigh:
"井戸／弁護士席, Gertie, I suppose you are just one of Pharaoh's lean 肉親，親類."
Out of love, she made it sound like a compliment. Not to worry her, I submitted to Mother's habit of pinching my cheeks to make them look rosy whenever we approached Granny's doorstep. I even 訴える手段／行楽地d to the trick of pinching my own cheeks when alone on her doorstep, waiting for her to let me in.
The popular taste was still for buxom beauties. His Majesty King Edward could 'ave 'is Jersey Lily; the British workingman preferred a nice generous armful.
The winter I was ten, and at a time when our 財政／金融s 攻撃する，衝突する 激しく揺する 底（に届く）, Mother got herself a 職業 in the chorus in a Christmas 生産／産物 of Babes in the 支持を得ようと努めるd at the Brixton Theatre. The casting director 熟考する／考慮するd her pleasing curves, listened to her 発言する／表明する, which was a very good soprano, and for once did not ask her to 解除する her long skirts to show her 脚s. This was fortunate, for though Mother had pretty ankles, the 残り／休憩（する） of her below the waist seemed to have no relation to the part of her above the waist. However, she had no 誤った notions about her 形態／調整, and she had a very practical mind.
Having 調印するd the 契約, she （機の）カム home with the flesh-colored tights 供給（する）d by the wardrobe mistress. Putting them on, she 教えるd me how to pad the 脚s of this 衣料品 with cotton wool to give her the much-願望（する）d and seductively 一連の会議、交渉／完成するd thighs which she unfortunately 欠如（する）d. Of course it was possible to buy tights thus 扱う／治療するd. These were called symmetricals. But they were very expensive, その結果 necessity drove us to make ours at home.
Mother would stand on a 議長，司会を務める in 前線 of a mirror and direct me as I poked the wads of cotton 負かす／撃墜する inside the silk tights. It was a long and tedious 職業, because the padding had to be sewn in 滑らかに so that it would not be （悪事，秘密などを）発見するd.
Though I was only ten, I understood very 明確に that her 職業 in the chorus and the thirty shillings she was to get each week meant bread and groceries and coal and gaslight for us at home. I was 井戸／弁護士席 aware that it was up to me to make those 脚s 満足させる the theater patrons and the eagle 注目する，もくろむ of the 経営者／支配人.
That is how I learned at a still tender age that frequently a woman's 脚s (and not her 直面する) are her fortune.
Finally, after a week of waiting and rehearsals, our 部隊 got its orders to leave for Southampton.
There were eighteen of us, and we traveled in three cars—one large bus, one 先頭 for 器具／備品, and a car for Mary, Stanley Kilbourn, my ピアニスト, and me, with our driver.
Our first concert was 船内に H.M.S. Collingwood. We had a 広大な／多数の／重要な （人が）群がる—about thirty-five hundred enlisted 職員／兵員, WRENS, officers, the commodore, and his wife.
During my week of waiting in London I had been 要求するd to 服従させる／提出する to the 公式の／役人 censor the songs I had brought over from America to sing to the boys. Two of the songs were 率d "not やめる suitable for the B.B.C.," but they were finally passed as O.K. for the servicemen.
The songs I worked over and which I sang at that first concert were "A Lovely Way to Spend an Evening," which was one of Frank Sinatra's successes; Gertrude Niesen's song "I Wanna Get Married" from Follow the Girls, and "A Guy 指名するd Joe." I also had the saga of an 空気／公表する-（警察の）手入れ，急襲-避難所 romance, する権利を与えるd "'E 消えるd When the All-（疑いを）晴らす （機の）カム." The last two numbers were written 特に for me by two American boys, Bus Davis and Jim Carhart.
The most delightful surprise of the concert 船内に H.M.S. Collingwood was finding Richard seated in the 前線 列／漕ぐ／騒動. He had got leave for a couple of hours. There wasn't even time enough for him to take me 支援する to the hotel in Portsmouth where Mary Barrett and I had been billeted; he had to return to his base. But even that glimpse of him was wonderful. It 始める，決める me up no end.
I had just got into bed and was feeling terribly 感謝する for it after a long, hot, tiring, but exciting day.
"Good night, Mary. Have a nice, long, restful night."
"Good night," （機の）カム Mary's 発言する／表明する from the other room, and, almost like a punctuation to that 返答, the sudden shriek of the サイレン／魅惑的なs.
They were coming.
I sat up in bed in the dark and waited for the sound of the guns which would tell us the Germans were 総計費. I shivered—not, I hoped, from 恐れる, but from the suspense of waiting. I was under no misapprehension as to the 量 of 損失 the raiders had done and could do to a town like Portsmouth. I had seen it with my own 注目する，もくろむs.
Presently the guns started. It was strange to sit there in bed in the 中央 of my first real war experience. Between the enemy 爆弾s and our own guns Portsmouth was 現実に the 前線. Yet in the street below people were calmly walking to 空気／公表する-（警察の）手入れ，急襲 避難所s. One man went by whistling: "I Dream of Jeanie with the Light Brown Hair."
The "all （疑いを）晴らす" （機の）カム after about an hour, and I dropped off to sleep. The next thing I knew Mary Barrett was shaking me awake. The guns were going like mad again. We sat and waited. Nothing happened; so Mary curled up on the foot of my bed and we dozed off until all at once the ロケット／急騰する gun on the sea 前線 went off. We both 発射 up and out of the bed, grabbed our papers, and 用意が出来ている to dash out of the hotel if the hotel people 通知するd us to do so. We had been told the ロケット／急騰する guns were not 解雇する／砲火／射撃d unless the enemy was 総計費 and 飛行機で行くing low. They are precision guns and 解雇する／砲火／射撃 直接／まっすぐに on the 的; but, although they are very powerful, they 明らかに 港／避難所't a very long 範囲. The noise they made was incredible; as if Jerry were dropping blockbusters. I really thought we had been 攻撃する，衝突する, and my reaction—born of 神経s—was to get the giggles!
Mary had been through it all many times over, on all the war 前線s. She said the thing to do was to stay there in the room unless someone （機の）カム and yanked us out. The only one who did turn up was Stanley, who （機の）カム running 負かす／撃墜する the 回廊（地帯） to see if we were all 権利. Stanley had been 爆弾d out of four different homes during the blitz, and, as he put it, he was "fed oop with it all."
They chased Jerry out to sea about 2:30 A.M., then the "all （疑いを）晴らす" sounded, and we went 支援する to bed and to sleep.
Next day Richard rang up to find out how I felt about it all. Now I could speak as a war 退役軍人 and I told him rather loftily that it felt better than 存在 three thousand miles away, getting the news over the 無線で通信する, and wondering where and how he was.
I saw some of the night's 損失 that day and the next, during which our 部隊 covered the entire Southampton area. There was a new and very 汚い 穴を開ける in the 味方する of the building next to our hotel.
Every noon we put on the show at a 計画（する） factory or a shipyard or in a hangar for the 労働者s, and at night we gave concerts at the （軍の）野営地，陣営s. At the 市民の Theatre in Southampton we played to some eight thousand men and women, 代表するing all the 連合した nations and all 支店s of the service, and from there we went on to give a show under canvas—and in a 注ぐing rain—at （軍の）野営地，陣営 C. 22 for two thousand American and British 特別奇襲隊員s.
The whole area was feeling the suspense of approaching D-Day. No one, of course, would, or could, say when that would be, but the bases and the men were 存在 "調印（する）d." 運動ing home from a secret concert at Broderick for Americans and British about to leave, we passed thousands of "ducks" all lined up along the road to Southampton, ready to pull out at 夜明け for somewhere.
At the end of the show at C. 22, our 経営者／支配人, Norman Adams, called me aside and told me orders had just come through that our 部隊 was to return to London すぐに. In fact, he said, our show that night, which had gone 特に 井戸／弁護士席, had almost been 取り消すd in the middle of the 法案. It seems that word had come through that the entire 地位，任命する was to be "調印（する）d" and all E.N.S.A. 部隊s would have to 避難させる or be 調印（する）d in until after D-Day for 安全 推論する／理由s.
After 断言するing me to secrecy, Adams collected the whole 部隊 and led us all to the officers' mess for refreshments. The mess was just a テント with a trestle （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する, but they put on やめる a good meal for us, and the refreshment was good old bathtub gin with the kick of a bronco. As we laughed and joked, I wondered whether the fellows knew that I knew this was to be their last party for a long, long time. No について言及する was made of their 出発, but as they （人が）群がるd around our cars and shouted and waved to us as we drove away into the 不明瞭 支援する to London, I had the horrid feeling we were 砂漠ing them.
On arriving in London we were すぐに re-大勝するd to another 沿岸の area. It turned out to be Brighton.
My orders （機の）カム through to be ready to start on the morning of June 5. After leaving the Savoy, we drove through the 地区s of London that were home to me as a child—past Kennington Oval, past the "Horns Hotel" where my father had sung at smoking concerts for a guinea a night, past the Brixton Theatre where I made my 行う／開催する／段階 debut at the age of ten for the magnificent sum of six shillings per week in that same Christmas play in which Mother had worn her homemade symmetricals.
The 経営者／支配人 手配中の，お尋ね者 a child who could sing and dance with nine others in a troupe, and one who could be 信用d to be on time for the show and not get into mischief. Mother 約束d she would take care of all that, and I was taken on.
We children were little コマドリ redbreasts in the forest ballet when the "Babes" got lost in the 支持を得ようと努めるd. Dressed in brown tights, very wrinkled at the 膝s, our skinny 団体／死体s 覆う？ in musty feathers and with hats which had beaks in 前線, we covered the two unfortunate children with 人工的な leaves to keep them from the 冷淡な until they were 救助（する）d by コマドリ Hood and his Merry Men. Mother was one of the Merry Men! I can remember to this day the song which コマドリ Hood sang in this scene. The chorus went like this:
There's a little green patch at the 最高の，を越す of the hill,This was sung with 広大な／多数の／重要な gusto, …を伴ってd by the marching up and 負かす／撃墜する and suitable gestures and hearty thigh slappings of Mother and the seven other Merry Men.
Climb, boys, climb.
And it's there we can 残り／休憩（する） at our 楽しみ and will
Climb, boys, climb.
Though the way be dreary and your heart be 疲れた／うんざりした,
It will all come 権利 in time.
There's a little green patch at the 最高の，を越す of the hill,
So climb, boys, climb.
At this time Mother had a friend, who was a friend of the mother of Ivy Shilling who played Alice when 吊りくさび Carroll's immortal story was dramatized for a Christmas 生産／産物. I was taken to see the play. We sat in a box, which was the first time in my life I ever enjoyed such prominence. I watched every move, every gesture of Alice's, and my envy of Ivy Shilling gave me no 残り／休憩（する） until I nagged Mother into taking me to 行方不明になる Conti's dancing school, at which she was a pupil.
行方不明になる Italia Conti held a unique place in the world of the British theater. She had a 地階 studio just off 広大な／多数の／重要な Portland Street where the boys and girls she 受託するd as pupils practiced dance steps, did acrobatic 演習s on the 水平の 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業, and were taught elocution and the rudiments of the 演劇. The studio was a big room lined with mirrors in which you could see yourself from every angle, and at one end was a small 行う／開催する／段階 with a piano.
Mother had no money to 支払う／賃金 for dancing and singing lessons for me. Dad had 苦しむd a run of bad luck for months, and we had moved to cheaper and still cheaper lodgings. My education did not 利益 by these flittings about Clapham and Brixton; whenever we moved into a new 地区 it usually meant my entering a new school. It also meant finding myself one of a new group of children, who stood off and 注目する，もくろむd me suspiciously.
The boys and girls at 行方不明になる Conti's 注目する，もくろむd me too. But their ちらりと見ることs were different. They looked at me appraisingly—not for my 着せる／賦与するs or where I lived, but for what I was able to do. Many of them had been born into theatrical families. All of them aspired to stardom.
I sang and danced for 行方不明になる Conti, and she thought me 十分に talented to 申し込む／申し出 to give me 解放する／自由な lessons. On these 条件 I was 入会させるd one afternoon a week for a six weeks' 裁判，公判 period. If I showed 約束, I had the 適切な時期 of staying on as a pupil-teacher, その為に 返すing my tuition.
I am a little 煙霧のかかった about those weeks at 行方不明になる Conti's. It was an 完全に new world to me. I am under the impression that Noel Coward was already a pupil there when I started. If he was not, he （機の）カム very soon after, because Noel 人物／姿／数字s 大部分は in all my memories of 行方不明になる Conti. Anton Dolin joined the school later to 熟考する／考慮する Shakespeare.
Noel was a thin, 異常に shy boy with a slight lisp. He was 熟考する／考慮するing elocution, 事実上の／代理, and dancing (or should I say deportment?) and was one of 行方不明になる Conti's 星／主役にする pupils. Noel's people were in a position to give him 教育の advantages. They were "comfortably 据えるd."
Noel wasn't snobbish about this; in fact, he and I, who were about the same age, entered at once into an 同盟.
This doesn't mean that Noel wasn't occasionally condescending to me, but this condescension sprang from a やめる natural masculine impulse to put in her place an irrepressible and very plain-looking small girl who had the annoying faculty of getting herself noticed. I could put up with the condescension. What I could not have 耐えるd was to have Noel ignore me.
However, even at the age of eleven I 苦しむd no illusions as to what 構成するd the charm I had for Noel Coward. I was the proud possessor of a bicycle, bought for me from the boy next door by a friend of Dad's. The bicycle 初めは had a 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業 across the middle, but Mother, ever practical, paid a man to saw this off so a girl could ride it. However, even she could not alter the drooping handlebars which showed it was a boy's model. Noel pointed this out すぐに:
"It's やめる unsuitable for a girl."
He could not 隠す from me the fact that he 手配中の，お尋ね者 a bicycle, which was something his family would not 許す him to have.
But Noel had a 所有／入手 which I 内密に coveted—a phonograph with a large spreading horn. He also owned a stack of 記録，記録的な／記録するs. So we made a 取引，協定. He could ride my bicycle in return for lending me his phonograph for the same length of time. I imagine that sort of lend-賃貸し（する） is as good a basis for a lifelong friendship as any other.
Noel's 記録，記録的な／記録するs 大いに 増加するd my 知識 with the popular music of the day. They also brought me the beauty of "The Blue Danube," the 甘い rhythm of "Valse Triste," and the sticky romance of the "Indian Love Lyrics."
So once a week I packed my small attaché 事例／患者 含む／封じ込めるing my toe-dancing slippers, my practice 着せる／賦与するs, soap and a towel, and took the bus to 広大な／多数の／重要な Portland Street, always in the hope that Noel would be there.
行方不明になる Conti had undertaken to teach me to dance and to sing, at least to the extent of fitting me to appear in one of the Christmas plays. These are a part of the holiday season in England, and the theater 経営者／支配人s always went to 行方不明になる Conti for child actors to play in them. 行方不明になる Conti 設立する no fault either with my 脚 work or my 声の 成果／努力s. But my accent, which was pure cockney, 原因（となる）d her to wince. One day she led me to the piano and, after laying a sheet of paper under the strings, she struck a chord.
"That, my dear Gertrude," she said, "is what your 発言する／表明する sounds like to me."
My quick ear 認めるd the similarity between the tinny vibrations and my own accent. That was my introduction to phonetics.
I was not good enough to appear in one of the Christmas plays. However, I was 認可するd for a part in a fairy play called Fifinella, which was put on at the Repertory Theatre in Liverpool. We were rehearsed in London, under 行方不明になる Conti's careful 注目する，もくろむ, and then sent up in the care of a matron and her husband. Estelle Winwood played the beautiful Fairy Queen, but she made little impression on me because I had 注目する，もくろむs only for the Prince in his scarlet tights and doublet. This fascinating hero was played by Eric Blore. I thought him wonderful. And 明白に no one had 設立する it necessary to pad his tights with cotton wool.
The first time Noel and I appeared together was in a German morality play, Hannela, put on at Manchester, under the direction of Mr. Basil Dean. Noel and I played angels in white 式服s, gilded wings, and sanctimonious smiles. Neither of us, as I remember, cared for the play or for our parts in it. However, we touched the heart of Noel's kindly uncle, for he asked 許可 to take us for an afternoon's 遠出.
It was Christmas week, and the shops were 十分な of 入り口ing things to buy. By さまざまな ruses Noel and I enticed him to one shopwindow after the other, artfully pointing out what each of us would like to receive for a Christmas 現在の. But our benefactor was not in a generous mood that day. Not till the afternoon was nearly over did he 弱める and buy us a large box of peppermint creams, which he made us 約束 to divide with the other children in the cast.
Noel and I managed to forget this admonition and to eat most of the 甘いs ourselves in the taxi on the way home. Soon I began to feel very queer. When we went on in the heaven scene, the other celestial 存在s seemed to float and （頭が）ひょいと動く dizzily around me. I stole a ちらりと見ること at Noel. He was 前向きに／確かに green. Presently the audience was permitted an 予期しない 見通し of heaven in which two small angels were 存在 violently sick.
I couldn't have been a total 失敗 as an angel, because soon after Hannela I was given a 職業 in The 奇蹟 then 存在 put on by Reinhardt at the Olympia. The play called for one hundred children—fifty boys and fifty girls. As we did two shows a day, and the children （機の）カム from homes all over London, the London 郡 会議 設立するd a special school for us at Olympia. We had classes in the mornings, then dinner, after which it was time to dress and be made up for the daily matinee. Olympia is out beyond Shepherd's Bush, a 疲れた／うんざりしたing, long tram ride home after the evening 業績／成果.
It must have been that summer that Dad took Mother and me on a Sunday excursion to Brighton. The 訴える手段／行楽地 was （人が）群がるd with trippers like ourselves; the 禁止（する）d kept up a ceaseless accompaniment of music, and the Pierrot troupes on the sands played to enormous 商売／仕事. I watched their 業績／成果 with a 批判的な 注目する，もくろむ; after all, I was now in the profession.
On the pier, の中で other penny-in-the-slot machines was one showing a gaudily painted picture of a gypsy. The machine 約束d to tell your fortune for a penny. I dropped my 巡査 piece into the slot and waited anxiously while the machine ground out a few 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業s of a popular tune; it then proceeded to stick a tongue of pink cardboard at me. There were words printed on it. I tore off the slip and read my penny 運命:
A 星／主役にする danced,
And you were born.
I 受託するd my 運命／宿命 without hesitation. The gypsy meant to tell me that I would be a ダンサー and someday I would be a 星／主役にする.
A few days later I stopped in at the printers in Clapham High Street and ordered some cards made. I had written out what I wished the printer to put on these bits of pasteboard:
I had used the 指名する Lawrence, because that was the 行う／開催する／段階 指名する Mother used. I was 特に proud of the word "danseuse," which, （許可，名誉などを）与えるing to the old gentleman on High Street who printed the cards, meant "ダンサー" in French. Already I could see my 指名する in electric lights on Shaftesbury Avenue. I had never been to that thoroughfare except on a bus, but I had heard about it and dreamed of it as children today talk and dream about Hollywood.
I did not show the pink slip of paper with my fortune to anyone; perhaps I was afraid it would not come true if I 株d the secret. But my professional cards were different. I scattered them like confetti and with 完全にする self-保証／確信.
The mother of "your cousin Ruby," who up to now had produced the most 約束ing child in the family, said to Mother: "Do you want your child in that sort of life, Alice? I wouldn't. Not for my Ruby."
"Your Ruby hasn't the temperament," Mother 反対するd. "You've got to have temperament for the 行う／開催する／段階."
"Temperament! 井戸／弁護士席, Alice, you can call it that if you like. Myself, I'd give a plainer 指名する to it. And when it comes to temperament, anyone would think you'd had enough of that with Gertie's father. If she was my child and had his 血 in her veins, I wouldn't let her 近づく a theater. That I wouldn't."
Cousin Ruby's mother had 作戦行動d Mother into an impossible 状況／情勢. She could not defend my father without appearing disloyal to Dad, or without 製図／抽選 負かす／撃墜する on her the obvious retort: "井戸／弁護士席, if he was as good as all that, why did you ever leave him?"
It may have been such conversations as these with my aunt which 打ち明けるd my Mother's reticence. Up until then she had never について言及するd my father to me.
We were out shopping one day when suddenly she stopped to read a playbill stuck up on a 塀で囲む. It advertised a minstrel show. 長，率いるing the cast as the 星／主役にする appeared the 指名する: "Arthur Lawrence."
"That's your father, Gertie," said Mother, pointing.
I 星／主役にするd at the 指名する, trying to accustom myself to the idea of a 関係 between this man and me. No one had ever told me much about my father. I could not remember having seen him or heard of his taking the slightest 利益／興味 in my 存在. Dad was all the father I had known, or needed. This strange man on the playbill seemed suddenly to trespass on Dad's position. I slid a 尋問 ちらりと見ること at Mother. She was still 星／主役にするing at the poster. Her 発言する／表明する was suddenly wistful—and a little proud: "井戸／弁護士席, now you know. He's a 罰金 singer. You get your talent from him."
We went on, and no more was said about my father. I would have liked to have gone to the theater to see him and hear him sing, but Mother did not 示唆する it. I only had to look at her to realize that the 支配する was の近くにd. But the sudden 発見 that I had a father who was a success in the theater 始める，決める me thinking.
I was now nearly thirteen. For several years I had been appearing in plays from time to time, 収入 a few shillings a week. The gypsy had given 保証／確信 that my fortune lay in the theater. As I compared Dad—dear, lovable, but 不成功の—with my own father, whose 指名する appeared in big letters on the playbill, a 計画（する） began to develop in my mind. I began to watch the bookings of the minstrel show starring Arthur Lawrence.
For all that I might not have done anything about it except for two things which happened 同時に. We were を受けるing one of our periodic lean periods. These seemed to occur more frequently and lasted longer as Dad's luck became more and more elusive. And Mother, 困らすd perhaps by some 発言／述べる of her sister-in-法律 on the proper bringing up of daughters, had become more strict with me.
One evening several months later, when Mother and Dad were out, I decided to carry out my 計画（する）, and I packed a few 所持品 in a small straw portmanteau. I then collected all the empty 瓶／封じ込めるs and jars in the house, returned them to the grocer's, and got the money I needed for the 旅行. Wearing my best coat and a large mushroom-形態／調整d hat, and carrying the portmanteau, I took the tram to the theater where I knew my father was appearing. A 公式文書，認める left on the kitchen （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する for Mother and Dad told them of my 決定／判定勝ち（する） to join my father, and that they were not to worry.
The 行う／開催する／段階 doorman looked at me suspiciously. "Now then, what do you want, youngster?" he 需要・要求するd.
"I've come to see Mr. Lawrence."
He frowned. "It's not at all likely Mr. Lawrence will see you. He's dressing now to go on."
"I'll wait," I said, and 始める，決める 負かす／撃墜する the portmanteau. "It's very important."
Perhaps something in my トン made the doorman realize that this was no ordinary occasion. He squinted at me はっきりと.
"What's your 指名する? I'll tell Mr. Lawrence you're here."
I swallowed. "Just tell him it's Gertie."
The doorman went away, slamming the door to 妨げる my slipping in. For a moment I felt an impulse to turn and run. There was still time to return to Clapham—to 掴む and destroy the penciled 公式文書，認める I had left letting Mother and Dad know my 決定／判定勝ち（する）. But something—my own 運命 perhaps—held me there on the （法廷の）裁判 inside the 行う／開催する／段階 door. Presently I heard steps coming along the 回廊（地帯） and a mutter of 発言する／表明するs. The door opened...
A man stood there—a very tall man who leaned 今後 to peer 負かす／撃墜する at me in the 薄暗い, flickering light of the gas bracket in its wire cage. He was in his shirt sleeves and collarless. One half of his 直面する was smeared with grease and burnt cork. Out of the 黒人／ボイコット 直面する a pair of very blue 注目する，もくろむs 星／主役にするd at me in utter incredulity. He spoke in a 深い, 静かな 発言する／表明する:
"Who are you? What are you doing here?"
I drew my card from my pocket and 手渡すd it to him. His 注目する，もくろむs took in the printed words, then （機の）カム 支援する to me.
"I'm Gertie," I said. "And I've come to stay."
運動ing 負かす／撃墜する to Brighton on that June day, strangely it was the memories of the past which were more vivid and more alive in my mind than the scenes we drove through. That glimpse of Kennington Oval and Brixton brought 支援する events and persons I had not thought of in years. For some 推論する／理由 or other, and I suppose only a psychologist could explain it, this visit home to a fighting England was like a visit to a psychoanalyst. In Lady in the Dark I had played the part of a successful businesswoman who had been psychoanalyzed. Her dreams were 再生するd on the 行う／開催する／段階 in fantastic scenes. In somewhat the same way, recollections of "Little Gertie Lawrence—child actress and danseuse," began to form scenes that were scarcely いっそう少なく fantastic than those imagined by Moss Hart for Lady in the Dark.
Suddenly I smelled again the 冷淡な, dusty, tremendously exciting smell of backstage in that Music Hall Theatre when Father, still 持つ／拘留するing my card in one 手渡す, reached out the other and caught me by the wrist. He pulled me over the threshold, past the doorman, and let the 行う／開催する／段階 door 激突する behind us.
"Come along to my dressing room. Curtain's going up in five minutes. I've got to finish dressing. You can wait there. I'll talk to you later on. Sit 負かす／撃墜する. And for God's sake, don't cry."
I had begun to weep from 救済, 恐れる, and the physical reaction to the whole adventure.
In the dressing room stood a woman 持つ／拘留するing the coat Father was to put on. He paid no attention to her, but went on 速く 黒人／ボイコットing the 残り／休憩（する） of his 直面する before the mirror. After which he put on a curly 黒人／ボイコット wig and stuck it 負かす／撃墜する with spirit gum.
"She's Gertie," he said out of the grotesque red mouth he had quickly painted in the middle of the 黒人／ボイコット 直面する. "She's my kid, Rose."
Rose did not move. She looked at me not unkindly and I 星／主役にするd 支援する at her. I was not 用意が出来ている for Rose.
A callboy went along the 回廊（地帯） calling, "Mr. Lawrence, please!"
Father turned from the mirror, his make-up 完全にするd, and thrust his 武器 into the evening coat Rose silently held out for him. He jerked 負かす／撃墜する his waistcoat, twitched his white tie a fraction of an インチ, and was gone.
Only then Rose turned to me, standing there gripping my portmanteau and 星／主役にするing. "So you're Arthur's little girl," she said. "How old are you?"
"I'm thirteen," I said.
"You are! 井戸／弁護士席..." She looked me over appraisingly. "There's not much of you."
Rose herself was what Granny would have called a 罰金 人物／姿／数字 of a woman, which meant she had plenty of curves. She had also, I noticed, very pretty ankles. Show girl, I thought.
Rose told me I had better sit 負かす／撃墜する because we would have a long wait. A minstrel show wasn't like a play in which the actors frequently left the 行う／開催する／段階 for long periods. Once the curtain was up, my father would remain on 行う／開催する／段階 until the end of the 行為／法令／行動する.
During that wait Rose and I became 熟知させるd. She had a 肉親，親類d heart and there was no guile in her. She loved my father and said so with a 武装解除するing frankness. She continued to tidy up the dressing room. "We've been together six years, Arthur and me. That's more than a lot of married couples can say. Oh, not but what we've had our quarrels. And who hasn't, I'd like to know."
I nodded. I 設立する myself liking Rose, who 認める me so hospitably into the intimacy of her life. But it was （疑いを）晴らす that she did not ーするつもりである to consider me one of the family.
"You can't stay with us," she went on. "You know that, I suppose?" (I didn't. How could I, when I had never known of the 存在 of Rose until that evening?)
Then she said: "Your mother will be here to fetch you 支援する tonight or in the morning, and there'll be all hell to 支払う／賃金."
I told her I had left a 公式文書，認める for Mother and that I couldn't go 支援する. But すぐに Rose dashed my 計画（する）s by 発言／述べるing: "Of course you can't stay on with Arthur and me. We can't travel you."
Strangely, that 可能性 had not occurred to me. I began to wish I had not left the 公式文書，認める. Still, I thought, something might happen to 妨げる Mother coming. 一方／合間, I had to 勝利，勝つ Rose over to my 味方する. I told her about my experience as an actress, 強調するing the fact that 行方不明になる Conti considered I had talent. I showed Rose my card.
She was 明白に impressed.
"How nice! Danseuse looks elegant. やめる West End."
"I think so," I agreed complacently.
When Father （機の）カム off 行う／開催する／段階, he 設立する us chatting comfortably. Perhaps this 解除するd a worry from his mind.
"The kid's all 権利, Arthur," Rose said. "She's got a lot of you in her, I'd say." She repeated to him 簡潔に what I had told her about my experience in the theater. "She must be good."
Was it Rose's 受託 of me which 説得するd my father to keep me with him? I have いつかs thought so. That, and a curious pride in the child who had followed his profession, made my father suddenly laugh and say to me: "You can stay with us for tonight, anyway. We'll find a place for you somewhere in our digs. She can sleep on the sofa, can't she, Rose? We'll send a 電報電信 to your mother this minute and tell her you're all 権利. Tomorrow we can talk things over."
Mother did not appear until the next morning. What passed between my parents I never knew, but an 協定 was made by which I was to remain with Father as long as I wished to do so and he would support me. I was to 令状 to Mother once a week and keep her 知らせるd of my どの辺に. If anything went wrong, she was to be すぐに advised of it and was to come and take me 支援する to live with her.
That is how my life with Father and Rose began. I 株d their lodgings and whatever they had. Whatever I earned, when I had a 職業, Father got, under our 共同の 契約, since I was under age.
Although I 行方不明になるd Mother and Dad terribly, I 行方不明になるd Granny even more. I often thought of her and her tidy little house. I 行方不明になるd the news of the 王室の Family. King Edward VII had died—his funeral was the first 明言する／公表する 野外劇／豪華な行列 I had not read about in history 調書をとる／予約するs. Now all the talk was of the 載冠（式）／即位（式） of King George V and Queen Mary. To me, as to millions of children throughout the Empire, the 主要な personage at the 来たるべき 載冠（式）／即位（式） was the youthful Prince of むちの跡s. Perhaps our 世代 derived an 巨大な 量 of satisfaction from the fact that one of us was to 占領する a 目だつ place at the Abbey 儀式. The newspapers and illustrated 週刊誌s were 十分な of photographs of H.R.H. Prince Edward and his sister and brothers. The princess 利益／興味d me very little, but every photograph of Prince Edward I （機の）カム across I 削減（する） out and pinned to the 塀で囲む of my room. The 増加するing collection of photographs traveled with me.
And we were 絶えず on the move, 小旅行するing the Midlands, swinging 支援する to London to look for fresh 約束／交戦s. When we were not working, I amused myself in any way that I could. I did the shopping for Rose and helped her keep our lodgings tidy. We made our own 着せる／賦与するs, trimmed our own hats. I made myself a hobble skirt out of a 残余 of tweed when I was fourteen. Rose 高く評価する／（相場などが）上がるd these 成果／努力s of 地雷. She was not a housekeeper, but she was neat, and Father's untidiness was a constant annoyance to her.
Life wasn't all beer and skittles. Not by any means. Father still liked his glass, and though he would go several months without drinking, invariably there （機の）カム a day when he would become short-tempered, restless, and start going out between the matinee and the night show. Finally he would 割れ目 up. Then he became ugly, cruel, and impossible to 扱う. Neither Rose nor I could do anything with him.
I began to watch for these drinking 一区切り／（ボクシングなどの）試合s and to dread them and the 列／漕ぐ／騒動s that went on at the theater with the 経営者／支配人 and other members of the company and at home with Rose. In between （一定の）期間s Rose and I formed a 共謀 to keep Father in bounds. One or the other of us kept watch over him all the time. We would try to think up 計画／陰謀s for keeping him happy and entertained, but when our cleverness failed to 勝利，勝つ over Father's craving, Rose and I knew we were in for it. Father would go on drinking, growing more and more sullen, more and more difficult to 扱う, until the 経営者／支配人 paid us off. Since Father and I were always on a 共同の 契約, this meant I lost my 職業 when he was 解雇する／砲火／射撃d. When that happened, he would drink himself into a 明言する／公表する in which he was unable to go out at all. Poor Rose then put him to bed and nursed him until he sobered. Father would 現れる from her 手渡すs chastened, and go out to 追跡（する） a new 約束／交戦 for himself and for me. We had no スパイ／執行官. We could not afford an スパイ／執行官's （売買）手数料，委託（する）／委員会／権限. It was our habit to search the "手配中の，お尋ね者" 広告s in the theatrical newspapers. いつかs Father heard of something through hanging around the （人が）群がるs by the London Hippodrome.
We had been out of work for several weeks and were more than usually hard up when Father landed a 職業 to play in a 小旅行するing 復活 of André Messager's The Little Michus, a comic operetta for which his 発言する／表明する was perfect. He （機の）カム home to the dreary 支援する room in Camberwell where he and I were then living to tell me the good news. Rose was away on 小旅行する with a concert party. That room which was divided into two 私的な apartments by a curtain 一時停止するd from a sagging wire 代表するd the ebb tide of our fortunes.
But Father beamed over his good luck. He planked 負かす／撃墜する a couple of half 栄冠を与えるs from the 前進する he had 説得するd the company 経営者／支配人 to give him and said gaily:
"Let's have sausages for supper, Gertie. This calls for a 祝賀, my girl."
I pocketed the coins and made ready to go out and do the shopping. 一方／合間 Father ran on about the company and the play. He was to play M. Michu, the proprietor of a patisserie and the perplexed parent of twin daughters, Marie Blanche and Blanche Marie—the "little Michus." すぐに I pricked up my ears.
"Who will play the girls?" I 需要・要求するd.
"Not a chance of it," Father smiled at me ruefully. "I spoke to the 経営者／支配人 about you. He was 利益／興味d until he asked me your age, and I had to tell him fifteen. Then he wouldn't hear of it. He 主張するs he must have someone older. It's too bad, because you could do it, I'm sure."
I thought hard. I went to the mirror and 熟考する／考慮するd what I saw there. What could I do to myself to 追加する three or four years to my age?
"Are you sure he hasn't filled both parts yet?"
Father said he was. "He has one girl. She's about your 高さ. But she's nineteen or twenty, I'd say."
My hair was long and hung in curls to my waist. I 小衝突d out the ringlets and for the first time put my hair up. I rummaged in the cupboard and brought out my one straw hat. I 削減（する） off the brim, pinned on a bunch of cherries, and contrived a toque which could be called anything but youthful. In my tweed hobble skirt I looked at least eighteen.
Thus arrayed, and with Father's 激励, I 現在のd myself at the 経営者／支配人's office and asked for the 職業. He tried my 発言する／表明する and engaged me on a 共同の 契約 with Father, as I was still under age, no 事柄 how old I looked.
Father and I 小旅行するd with The Little Michus for many weeks. When Rose's 約束／交戦 ran out, she joined us. We were playing to good 商売／仕事 and it looked as though the show would have a long run. Then Father succumbed to one of his drinking （一定の）期間s. Rose and I did our best to straighten him out and to cover him up. But as the drinking went on for days, the 経営者／支配人 解雇する／砲火／射撃d him.
This meant that I, too, was once more out of work.
"I'd like to keep you on, kid," the 経営者／支配人 said 残念に. "You're good. But you're under age, and what can I do?"
Rose took Father in 手渡す once more and I searched the columns of notices in The 行う／開催する／段階 for a new 職業. This time I ーするつもりであるd to 嘘（をつく） boldly about my age. Rose agreed with me it was the thing to do. "It's no life for you, 存在 with Arthur," she said. "He's hopeless. I know that now. You must go on your own. You've got something, Gertie. I think you're going to get on. You're not pretty and you're too thin for everybody's taste, but you've got class. You know, I wouldn't be surprised if you were up in the West End one of these days."
"Oh, Rose. Do you really think so?"
Rose nodded solemnly. "Yes, I do. You've got something that goes 負かす／撃墜する with a 確かな 肉親，親類d of audience. High-トンd. It's just that you've got to be seen by the 権利 people. And that takes some doing."
"I'll land something before long," I 保証するd her.
What I landed was a 職業 as chorus girl and understudy in a traveling revue—one of the first of its 肉親，親類d—する権利を与えるd 行方不明になる Plaster of Paris. I had been 軍隊d to 嘘（をつく） about my age, but we needed the money 猛烈に. The man who ran the show and his wife played the 主要な parts. I worked in the chorus, played maids, and in one scene sat on a column. I was selected for this 栄誉（を受ける） because 地雷 was the smallest posterior in the company.
All week I looked 今後 to Saturday night when "the ghost walked" and we were paid. 支払う／賃金 night usually meant a good spree for the 経営者／支配人 followed by a fight with his wife in the course of which he frequently gave her a 黒人／ボイコット 注目する，もくろむ, thus 覆うing the way to my 外見 in the 主要な 役割 the に引き続いて Monday. For all this excitement and experience I received fifteen shillings a week.
I managed very 井戸／弁護士席 on this sum. Three or four of us lived together, 株ing room rent and pooling our money for the catering purse. We took turns doing the marketing each day. It was a hard-and-急速な／放蕩な 支配する that we count the potatoes before giving them to the landlady to cook for us. She was under orders to boil, not to mash them. This enabled us to be sure she had not helped herself to a couple of them. いつかs one of us would forget to give the order, and when the vegetable dish cover was 解除するd, a groan would go up:
"Oh, 爆破! The old bitch has mashed 'em!"
The 経営者／支配人 had an old white bull terrier which traveled with the show. The bulldog had appeared with his master when he played 法案 Sykes. At rehearsal one day, when we were 支援する in London 準備するing a second revue called 行方不明になる Lamb o f Canterbury, I was playing with the dog when he suddenly growled and sank his teeth into my 権利 手渡す, 辞退するing to let go.
I fainted. A doctor was sent for. I was cauterized, 包帯d, and told to go home. I was living in lodgings with Father. Rose had finally left him, "and this time for good," she had 主張するd. "Enough is enough, but too much is a little bit too much, if you ask me. And that's what I've had with Arthur. Oh, I've walked out on him before to teach him a lesson. And every time he's come 一連の会議、交渉／完成する within the fortnight and made all sorts of 約束s, and I've listened to him and gone 支援する. I can't say I've ever taught him a thing except what a man like him knows already—that a woman like me can be an awful fool. This time, though, I don't care about teaching Arthur anything. It's myself I'm thinking about. And high time too. Myself and you, Gertie."
"Me?"
"Yes, you. Because, don't you see if I stay on with your father you probably will too. And what would happen then? I've been seeing it coming for the last year. You and I would be working and keeping him. The way it is, if Arthur wants to eat and drink, he's got to work. And that means he'll keep sober more or いっそう少なく. Without him, you've got no one but yourself to think about. This is your chance to get ahead."
There was something in what Rose said. I thought it over and decided I should stand on my own. Father had been out of work for some time, but that morning he had told me he had a chance to go to South Africa. This seemed too good to be true. On the way home a thought struck me: if he knows what has happened to my 手渡す he may 辞退する to go so far away. "He must go. He must," I kept 説 all the way home.
Father was there when I arrived. He was tremendously excited. He had only to 調印する his 契約 next day and he would leave in a week.
"You will be all 権利, won't you, Gertie?" he said 熱望して. "You are getting on 罰金, and this will be a 広大な／多数の／重要な chance for me to earn some decent money and see a bit of the world. South Africa is a 広大な／多数の／重要な country. A man can start life over again out there."
I 保証するd him I was at the 最高の，を越す of my form, and kept my 包帯d 手渡す behind me, 説 nothing of the 激しい 苦痛. When he finally noticed the 包帯 I explained I had 削減（する） my 手渡す on a broken glass at rehearsal. Father never knew the truth about my 傷害, which took a long time to 傷をいやす／和解させる and left a scar which is still 明白な. He went off to South Africa and I managed to keep working. He was gone about a year. He （機の）カム home 井戸／弁護士席 and bronzed and self-保証するd. When I met him at the boat, he introduced me to an enormous, handsome man with whom he had made friends during his trip. This was 勝利者 McLaglen.
Unfortunately South Africa had not made Father's fortune or changed his habits. But something had changed in me during the months he was away. I had learned to stand alone, and by managing to keep on 小旅行する I never lived with Father again. He retired to Brighton, did an 時折の show or a concert, and later on I was able to help him until his death.
In between 職業s I lived at the "Cats' Home" in London so that I could make the 一連の会議、交渉／完成するs of the theatrical 経営者／支配人s' offices. This was a tall, gaunt house in Charlotte Street which called itself The Theatrical Girls' 搭乗 House. Here, for ten shillings a week, you could luxuriate in a cubicle by yourself. For five shillings you 株d a room with another girl. For half a 栄冠を与える you could have a cot in a 寄宿舎. I never reached the ten-shilling 私的な-cubicle 行う／開催する／段階.
There was a 広大な／多数の／重要な feeling of camaraderie at the Cats' Home. We girls 貸付金d each other tram fares and 着せる／賦与するs to look our best when 捜し出すing a 職業. There was a sewing room where we made our own 着せる／賦与するs, and the 星／主役にするs of the London theaters used to send their discarded gowns to us to be raffled off at sixpence a ticket. I remember winning a pink 逮捕する evening gown with a harem skirt and ornamented with beads. This I sent to Mother as a gift. She wrote 説 it was beautiful and she was going to put it in a raffle! That pink 逮捕する confection may still be going the 一連の会議、交渉／完成するs.
These and other memories filled the long, beautiful 運動 across Surrey and over the Sussex 負かす／撃墜するs, which I remembered so 井戸／弁護士席 from the days when I used to 運動 this way to Brighton to visit Pamela at her school, Roedean.
半端物 to think of Pamela, my daughter, having any 関係 with the little girl who ran away to 捜し出す her fortune on the 行う／開催する／段階. The １０年間 which separated that little girl from Pamela's mother was （人が）群がるd with experiences. Four of those years were filled with World War I, toward the の近くに of which Pamela was born. Long before I had the 責任／義務 of a child I had entered upon another 責任／義務—one which had remained unfulfilled until I made this trip to England to entertain the Tommies and the G.I. Joes who were 誓約（する）d to defend the way of life I want Pamela and all other children to have. I shall come to the story of that 責任／義務 and how I entered upon it a little later.
All the gay Regency recklessness was gone from Brighton. Barbed wire 妨げるd 接近 to the sea 前線. The old, 井戸／弁護士席-tanned houses, which always used to remind me of Indian 陸軍大佐s basking in the sun, with their 支援するs to the 保護するing 負かす／撃墜するs, showed plenty of 戦う／戦い scars. But there was still the old, 安定した, carrying-on spirit at the Old Ship Hotel where our 部隊 was billeted. In the old days, when I （機の）カム to Brighton, I had a 控訴 at the Albion or the Metropole, but these places had been taken over by the services, and only the Old Ship remained for 非軍事のs. I was 感謝する for my billet there—a 選び出す／独身 bedroom without a bath.
It was June 5 when we arrived in Brighton, and we did a show that night at Tilgate （軍の）野営地，陣営, outside Crawley, in a Nissen hut.
The 空気／公表する in the hut, which was packed with 兵士s, wedged shoulder to shoulder, seemed to quiver with 予期. It was bound to be very soon now, almost any hour, that the 国際連合 would 開始する，打ち上げる their long-用意が出来ている-for blow at the continent. The quivering you felt was like that of a boxer who draws 支援する a second before 攻撃するing out with both 握りこぶしs at his 対抗者.
"Oh, it's a lovely way to spend an evening," I sang to the 列／漕ぐ／騒動s upon 列／漕ぐ／騒動s of 直面するs that, from the 行う／開催する／段階, looked like spume on a khaki-colored sea. Silly words, and ironic under the circumstances. These words were on my lips, but while I sang them my heart was speaking those marvelous lines from King Henry V:
Now entertain conjecture of a time
When creeping murmur and the poring dark
Fills the wide 大型船 of the universe.
From （軍の）野営地，陣営 to （軍の）野営地，陣営 through the foul womb of night
The hum of either army stilly sounds,
That the 直す／買収する，八百長をする'd sentinels almost receive
The secret whispers of each other's watch:
解雇する／砲火／射撃 answers 解雇する／砲火／射撃, and through their paly 炎上s
Each 戦う／戦い sees the other's umber'd 直面する;
Steed 脅すs steed, in high and boastful neighs
Piercing the night's dull ear; and from the テントs
The armourers, 遂行するing the knights,
With busy 大打撃を与えるs の近くにing rivets up,
Give dreadful 公式文書，認める of 準備...
A country cock crowed, though it was not yet "the third hour of drowsy morning," when we 宙返り／暴落するd out of the cars, before the door of the Old Ship, and つまずくd up the stairs to bed.
How 半端物 to begin a day so momentous as June 6, 1944, with tea and toast. A warm 微風 which smelled like the 勝利，勝つd which blows across the sand dunes at Dennis 解除するd my bedroom curtains and 始める，決める me longing to go out for a bathe. Brighton was very 静かな except for the 頻発する waves of 計画（する）s 飛行機で行くing high 総計費—that monotonous accompaniment to life in 戦時 England. The newspaper brought the news that Rome had been ours since the day before. All dwellers in the 大陸の coast towns had been 警告するd by the army 指揮官 in 長，指導者 to 避難させる their homes at once. A headline 発表するd that His Majesty would speak on the 空気／公表する that night.
Were we on the eve of the 侵略 at last?
I went downstairs with my 手渡すs 十分な of letters for the 地位，任命する. It was the old hall porter, in his green baize apron, who told me that D-Day was at last a reality. Our 軍隊s had 始める，決める sail for the coast of Normandy at 5:00 A.M. That （軽い）地震 I had felt the night before was not imagined. I had caught the "dreadful 公式文書，認める of 準備."
Mary Barrett and I walked out into the 日光 and along the 前線. The people we met were very 静かな and looked a little grim, conscious of what must be taking place only forty-four miles across the Channel. Whenever a bevy of 計画（する）s passed 総計費, pointing toward フラン, all 注目する，もくろむs were 解除するd to them and, I dare say, all hearts. I know 地雷 was. I 手配中の，お尋ね者 猛烈に to speak to Richard, but I was told all 非軍事の telephone calls were 取り消すd. I knew he must be in the 中央 of the busiest day for the 海軍.
On the evening of D-Day our 部隊 was scheduled to do a show on the pier at 価値（がある）ing. The spirits of the men in the audience ran high, and no wonder, with good news coming in that our 侵略するing army had made an 前進する of ten miles into フラン within a few hours of 上陸. 価値（がある）ing is only a few miles east of Bognor, where I had my first glimpse of the sea and where I earned my first 君主. The Victorian poets had a fancy for 令状ing odes to places "revisited." This 小旅行する of the south coast was 十分な of such places for me.
The next day, Wednesday, the War Department unsealed a （軍の）野営地，陣営 for us, and we モーターd out toward Lewes to （軍の）野営地，陣営 Tanner. The men had rigged up an old barn to serve as a 天然のまま theater. When we arrived there, we 設立する the 軍隊／機動隊s in the 過程 of moving out for フラン. Hundreds had already left. From what one could learn, the 侵略 was going so 井戸／弁護士席—"going によれば 計画（する）" as Churchill 発表するd to the Empire—and the 前進する into フラン was so swift more men could be 派遣（する）d すぐに.
The 軍隊／機動隊s about to leave were already lined up when we arrived. They carried all their 器具／備品 and were wearing their Mae Wests. A groan went through the 階級s because they thought they would 行方不明になる our show.
So we 荷を降ろすd 急速な／放蕩な, and the 陸軍大佐 (his 指名する was Bury, and the outfit was called "Bury's Bashers") let them into the barn theater where we did our show for them. I sang my songs and then stood out in the farmyard waving to them as they drove out, 長，率いるd for フラン.
It was all like part of a film. There I stood in the middle of that once-平和的な farmyard, in the brilliant 日光, 涙／ほころびs streaming 負かす／撃墜する my 直面する, waving good-by to those men—knowing I was the last woman to sing them a song for many a 疲れた／うんざりした while.
When the トラックで運ぶs had pulled out, we returned to the barn and did our show again for the men who were still waiting for orders. Halfway through the 法案 we had to stop while the 軍隊／機動隊s were 召喚するd to 召集（する） outside. Again I went out, and kissed them and waved good-by. Again we struck up "Auld Lang Syne." Above the rumbling of the lorries rose the sound of men's 発言する／表明するs singing the song which I had just taught them.
By this time Mary Barrett and I were both 減ずるd to 低俗雑誌. But the show had to go on; so, with a lumpy throat and an ache in my heart, I went 支援する to the barn and we did a third show.
There was no one to know that what I was doing there that afternoon—and what I was to do for many days at many other （軍の）野営地，陣営s throughout England—was the long-延滞の 支払い（額） of a 負債. Bury's Bashers and the other boys I sang to could not know what I 借りがあるd to half a dozen British Tommies of World War I who, before they went out to fight in Flanders, gave Gertrude Lawrence her chance to become a 星／主役にする.
Though I was now 完全に on my own, without 義務 to Father, I did not go 支援する to Clapham. What held me 支援する from doing this was bravado. I had left them and Granny to その上の my career as an actress. I was still a long way from 達成するing that goal and, therefore, I felt hesitant about going 支援する to the family. Above all, I had no 願望（する） to have the virtues of Cousin Ruby dinned into my ears. Someday, I 約束d myself, I'll be doing so 井戸／弁護士席 I can afford to go 支援する.
I was 決定するd to make good, and 深い inside myself was the unshaken 有罪の判決 that I would be a success someday. I was やめる willing to work for that success and to make sacrifices to 達成する it. I did work, not forgetting 行方不明になる Conti's teaching, and 努力する／競うing all the time to do better. Many of the girls I met in the companies in which I played, or at the Cats' Home, 認める, 率直に, that they were content just to be good enough to get by. They, 明らかに, did not have that insistent, not-to-be-ignored inner 運動 which 軍隊d me to practice 絶えず and to learn more and always more about the theater.
I cannot take any credit to myself for this 決意 to 後継する, for it was inherent in my nature. I did have to 戦う／戦い through periods of despair and 失望／欲求不満. But I am by nature 希望に満ちた. I do not understand 敗北・負かす. My own psychology in those years before I was seventeen was やめる simple: I believed, unquestionably, that I was 運命にあるd to be an actress. The fortune which the penny-in-the-slot machine on the pier at Brighton had given me seemed to me to 明言する／公表する this やめる unequivocally. I saw no 推論する／理由 to 疑問 the gypsy's prophecy. It might be. this season—or the next—that I would 現れる from the obscurity of the chorus of a musical which played the 州s and the cheaper 郊外s of London. But 現れる I would. 一方／合間 it was up to me to make myself as good as I could be. Each 業績／成果 was a fresh challenge.
One night after the show in Swindon there was a knock on the chorus's dressing-room door. The callboy 手渡すd me a card which read LEE WHITE AND CLAY SMITH, LONDON AND NEW YORK. I went out and 設立する an American couple on vacation from their London season. They were visiting Swindon to see the cathedral and had dropped in at our show.
They took me out to supper at their hotel and we talked.
"You're good," 物陰／風下 said to me 本気で. "You don't belong in a show like this. You've got something. Clay and I are going to keep our 注目する，もくろむs on you." She made me 約束 to keep them 知らせるd of what towns we played, and let them know whenever I changed shows. "You never can tell," she finished; "we may learn of something. And, when we do, you'll hear from us."
I rather 疑問d the 有効性，効力 of this 約束, but from time to time I would send them a picture 地位，任命する card to the 演説（する）／住所 物陰／風下 gave me.
Nearly a year later, while I was playing in Yarmouth, I received a 電報電信. It was 調印するd 物陰／風下 White and Clay Smith, and it said tersely that they had recommended me for a 職業 in a revue which André Charlot was 行う／開催する／段階ing in London. Can you come at once? the wire ended.
I was all for dashing to the 駅／配置する and leaping 船内に the first London 表明する, but the other girls, to whom I had shown the wire, held me 支援する.
"How do you know this is a 本物の 申し込む／申し出?" they 需要・要求するd. "Suppose you leave the show here and go 飛行機で行くing up to London only to find the 経営者／支配人 has 調印するd someone else? There you'll be—out of a 職業 and without a bean."
These suggestions sobered me. "What'll I do? I can't afford to throw over a chance like this, can I? It's for London!"
The girls agreed wholeheartedly that this was not to be thought of. We put our 長，率いるs together and concocted a return message: Does your wire 構成する a 契約? I ran 負かす／撃墜する to the 駅／配置する and sent it off; then I went 支援する to the theater to dress for that night's show, trying 猛烈に to keep my mind on my cues and not on the extravagant fancies that kept popping up when I thought of London.
When I （機の）カム off 行う／開催する／段階 after the final curtain, the 行う／開催する／段階 doorman 手渡すd me a 電報電信. I ripped it open. With the other girls （人が）群がるing around, peering over my shoulder, I read:
YES, IF YOU CAN COME AT ONCE, THIS TELEGRAM CONSTITUTES A CONTRACT. CLAY SMITH.Luckily, I had no 契約, but if I was to leave I had to do so without the 管理／経営 getting 勝利，勝つd of it. 支援する in our lodgings, my roommate, Madge, and I took 在庫／株 of our 資源s. It was a Tuesday night—four days to payday. What money I had 加える all that she could afford to lend me wouldn't 支払う／賃金 for a third-class ticket to London. Neither of us owned anything of value that we could pawn. We looked at each other, and for the first time in my life I felt desperate. Here was my chance—a chance for a 契約 at a London theater, and for the 欠如（する） of a few shillings I couldn't 掴む it. Madge said slowly:
"I've got a friend in （軍の）野営地，陣営 here. I'll get word to him. If he has any money, he'll help us. And, if he hasn't, he'll know how to raise it."
We didn't sleep much that night. I lay 緊張した, 星／主役にするing into the dark. Somehow, by some means or other, I must get the money for that ticket to London. Next morning I was packed and ready to take off when Madge went out to 会合，会う her boy friend. She （機の）カム 支援する in a short time, bringing him with her. He was a little, 有望な-直面するd lad from Bristol. Before he enlisted, he'd been a joiner's 見習い工. Now he was 演習ing with a 連隊 of gunners, getting ready to go over to Flanders. Madge showed him the wire and drew a vivid picture of the importance of this chance which had come my way. Bristol looked me over with a 思索的な 注目する，もくろむ, as if I were a horse on which someone was advising him to place his money. I tried to look as 約束ing as possible. If only he would think me 価値（がある） betting on. Presently he nodded. He had, he 知らせるd us, eight shillings, which he was 用意が出来ている to 危険 on me. My 直面する fell. Even with his eight shillings 追加するd to our 資源s, the ticket to London was a long way off. Madge explained this to him.
"That's all 権利," said Bristol complacently. "I've a couple of mates who might be willing to take a flier."
We arranged to 会合，会う him and his friends at the 鉄道 駅／配置する within an hour. Madge and I were standing by the ticket office when five British Tommies, with Bristol in the lead, bore 負かす／撃墜する on us.
"There she is," said he, pointing at me. The other five looked me over. Five 長，率いるs nodded approbation.
Out of the uniform pockets （機の）カム half 栄冠を与えるs and shillings which the Tommies 手渡すd over to Madge, my self-構成するd 財政上の 経営者／支配人. She counted the money. "Hurray! Enough for a ticket, and fifteen shillings over to see you through your first week in London," she said triumphantly.
While she bought my ticket, I turned to Bristol and his five mates. "Thank you, boys. You'll get your money 支援する. And you won't be sorry you've done this for me. I 約束."
"Oh, that's all 権利," one of the Tommies replied gallantly. "It's always a 楽しみ to help a lady."
"I mean it," I said 真面目に. "I won't forget what you've done for me today. Not ever! And when I'm playing at His Majesty's Theatre in the Haymarket, it'll be because you boys helped me get there."
The six Tommies saw me off on the London 表明する. I hung out of the window and waved to them, and they all waved 支援する to me.
"Best of luck, Gertie! Mind now, don't let us 負かす／撃墜する."
The little revue in which 物陰／風下 White and Clay Smith 設立する a place for me was one of the first of a long run of such shows 行う／開催する／段階d by André Charlot. The revue in which I made my first 外見 bore the innocuous 肩書を与える, Some. This was followed in turn by Cheep, Tabs, and Buzz-Buzz. I did a toe dance and a duet with Clay Smith, and was also in the chorus. Charlot gave me a three-year 契約 at three 続けざまに猛撃するs ten shillings a week the first year, four 続けざまに猛撃するs ten shillings the second, and six 続けざまに猛撃するs ten shillings the third. I was made.
The pattern of all these 戦時 revues was 簡単 itself. They were 行う／開催する／段階d with a 最小限 of scenery and a 最大限 of taste, and they were cast with 星／主役にする 指名するs. Charlot's revues caught on すぐに with the British public. Each of them had a long run, and when it の近くにd, it was almost すぐに 後継するd by another, 削減（する） to the same successful pattern.
The masculine part of those revue audiences was almost 完全に in khaki. The girls with the young 中尉／大尉／警部補s in the Gunners and Sappers wore gay evening frocks. The men themselves were home on leave from the Western 前線, and were 猛烈に in need of getting the sights and sounds of the 戦う／戦い 前線s along the Somme out of their systems. They 手配中の，お尋ね者 terribly to forget. They dined and danced and went on to the play and then on to supper clubs, where they danced again and drank, cramming their hours of leave with all the gaiety they could 掴む. It was up to us in Charlot's Revue to 申し込む／申し出 these men gaiety. It was up to us to bring laughs to boys whose youthful 直面するs were 始める，決める in grim lines and whose 注目する，もくろむs never やめる lost the 負傷させるd look even when their lips smiled. It was up to us to delude them into believing—if only for one 分裂（する） second—that death and 破壊 and terror and dirt and 苦痛 were unreal.
The boys adored Charlot's revues. You would look out into the house and see a boy sitting in the same seat night after night. You would smile at him across the footlights, 設立するing a comradeship. Then one night, when you looked, there would be another boy in khaki or 海軍 blue sitting in that seat. The other had gone 支援する, where and to what you didn't know and didn't want to guess. いつかs, after months, suddenly there he would be again, waiting for you to make him laugh. When he turned up like that, you felt better yourself and you'd think: "He's all 権利. He's come through this time." It never occurred to you, nor did it 事柄 at all, that you didn't even know his 指名する.
The London of June 1944 in which I had 設立する myself on arriving from America bore not the slightest resemblance to the London I remembered during the years 1915 to 1918. The audiences one saw at the West End theaters in the summer of 1944 were predominantly in uniform, but there was a noticeable 欠如（する） of girls in evening dress, and there was a striking absence of the hectic let-us-dance-and-be-merry-for-tomorrow-we-die gaiety, which was the undercurrent of the life I remembered during World War I. The Londoners of 1944 were quieter and more 事柄 of fact, even about their 楽しみs. They laughed at the jokes and the songs and the comedy skits in the shows, but you felt no desperation in their amusement. You felt that, not for one minute, though they laughed, did they forget the immediacy of war and the menace to all that the British people 持つ／拘留する dear. One felt—at least I did—that between 1917 and 1944 the British people had lost their 青年 and 回復するd their 知恵.
Bea Lillie was one of the 星／主役にするs of Some, and I was 要求するd to understudy her 同様に as appear in the chorus. Bea and I quickly became friends and partners in practical jokes which both of us adored to play on others in the cast.
I remember the night in 1917 when America entered the war. 物陰／風下 and Clay had sat up all the night before 令状ing a song 特に for the occasion, and had rehearsed it all day. The time （機の）カム for Clay to step out の上に the 行う／開催する／段階 and 発表する the new song. This done, the 前線 tabs were drawn, leaving room downstage for 物陰／風下 to sing in a スポットライト. Bea and I and the 残り／休憩（する） of the company were standing 支援する of the 減少（する） curtains to hear the new song. It was a march する権利を与えるd "America Answers the Call."
As 物陰／風下 sang, suddenly Bea started to march madly 支援する and 前へ／外へ 支援する of the curtain just behind 物陰／風下. I joined her. The cast began to laugh, and the more they laughed the more 誇張するd our marching became. Our 武器 waved until they moved the curtains. Finally Clay （機の）カム 負かす／撃墜する upon us.
"My God," he whispered ひどく at Bea, "where do you think you are?"
"The Ritz," she replied with her own inimitable gesture of the 権利 手渡す, and with that 独特の 解除する of the 発言する／表明する at the end of the line.
There was a rehearsal call the next day. Although Bea and I lived at opposite ends of London, by sheer coincidence we both arrived late. We were both 解雇する／砲火／射撃d.
The 星／主役にする and her understudy went out to lunch together. I knew Charlot would want to take Bea 支援する, but I was worried about myself. I had gone too far, and I had 本気で 感情を害する／違反するd 物陰／風下 and Clay, who had done so much for me.
Bea and I returned 謙虚に to the theater and I sat in the wardrobe mistress's room waiting to be sent for. Bea was forgiven, and I was lectured 厳しく and then—at 物陰／風下 White's 緊急の request—given another 裁判，公判.
Anyone would think I would have learned something by this experience, but 明らかに I did not. I was soon up to mischief again.
In one of the revues 物陰／風下 sang a song, "Have You Seen the Ducks Go By?" At the end of the 詩（を作る） a 列／漕ぐ／騒動 of 明白に 人工的な ducks appeared on a 塀で囲む at the 支援する of the 行う／開催する／段階 and moved across it in time to the music. The 影響 was made by us girls walking behind the 塀で囲む, with only our duck-like hats showing. That number was a hopeless 誘惑 to me. I couldn't help making my duck frisk about and behave as no 適切に 演習d duck would ever do. Nor could I resist popping my 長，率いる up over the 塀で囲む in the wrong place, winking at the audience, and laughing when they laughed at me. 自然に 物陰／風下 did not like this in the least. But Bea Lillie adored it and would join in with the chorus and pop her 長，率いる up—minus the duck headdress. いつかs she wore a man's straw hat and a 誤った mustache. The audience would howl with laughter, but it upset 物陰／風下. Finally Clay stopped speaking to me.
I suppose a psychologist could find a 推論する／理由 for the irrepressible impulse to play いたずらs which obsessed me for several seasons after I got started on the London 行う／開催する／段階. They were the 肉親，親類d of いたずらs that usually only school children think are funny—偽の 電報電信s, keyholes stuffed with soap, coat sleeves sewed up at the cuffs so that the 犠牲者 設立する it impossible to make a quick change of 衣装. If it seems strange that I should have taken such liberties after I had been at 苦痛s to get an 適切な時期 in a London 生産／産物, I can only explain these idiosyncrasies of 地雷 on the ground that I must have been making up for those years when I had been working at a time when most children my age were playing games. Perhaps it was just something I had to get out of my system. Perhaps, too, it was the not 異常な reaction of a girl who suddenly 設立する herself made much of for the first time in her life. On looking 支援する it seems to me 驚くべき／特命の／臨時の the patience which André Charlot had with me during those seasons. I must have been an unmitigated nuisance—to him and to all the other members of the company. What I needed was to have someone tick me off. 最終的に, André Charlot did just that.
During the run of Some I kept more or いっそう少なく within bounds. I was still the least important member of the cast. I had every 意向 of pleasing Mr. Charlot so that he would give me a place in his next revue. I was 決定するd not to go 支援する to 小旅行するing companies.
I had repaid the 貸付金 to Bristol and his mates, who had gone off to Flanders and from whom I received 時折の field 地位，任命する cards—the 肉親，親類d 供給（する）d to the 兵士s—with such messages as: "I am 井戸／弁護士席." "I am ill." "All the best. "令状 soon."
It may seem strange that I did not go out to Clapham to find Mother and Dad and let them know that I was now playing in London. What held me 支援する from this was my own ambition. Whenever I was tempted to go 支援する to Mother, Dad, and Granny, it seemed as though something in me would whisper: "Don't go yet. You're not somebody yet. Wait till you're somebody."
I entertained myself imagining the home-coming scene. I would make a 王室の 進歩 through Clapham in an open taxi. When I arrived at Mother's door there would be a flurry of excitement の中で the neighbors and Gertrude Lawrence, now the 星／主役にする of the London 行う／開催する／段階, would descend from her chariot to receive the congratulations of everybody.
Does this seem trivial and selfish? I do not 試みる／企てる to 正当化する it, or any of the other impulses which made me think such thoughts or do the things I did. Most of us, I believe, have or do still indulge in some such fantasy as this which 補償するs for a lot of hard knocks and heartaches. Very few の中で us are noble, or even 円熟した, in all parts of our nature at the same time.
So, though I daydreamed about it, I did not go 支援する to Mother. Mother, however, discovered me. One evening when I arrived at the theater, to （不足などを）補う for the show, a woman was standing just inside the 行う／開催する／段階 door. The doorman whispered she was waiting for me. It was Mother. We stood there in the drafty little passage, with people coming and going and 押し進めるing past us, and 星／主役にするd at each other. Suddenly all the years that had passed since the afternoon when I had suddenly conceived the 計画（する） of running away and throwing in my lot with my own father were swept away. I was once more a little girl who had done something she knew her mother would not 認可する of and who had been caught and was now wondering what was going to happen to her.
現実に, nothing happened. To my surprise, Mother took me in her 武器. To my question how she had 設立する me, she replied that she had been passing along the street when the 空気／公表する-（警察の）手入れ，急襲 警告 sounded. She had taken cover in a hotel next to our theater, and when the all （疑いを）晴らす （機の）カム she had stopped out of curiosity to see what was on at the theater. She had noticed the 指名する "Gertie Lawrence" の中で the small-part people.
My dream of impressing the family was 粉々にするd, but at least I had got my mother 支援する, and I realized then how much I had 行方不明になるd her. Granny, grown much older and やめる feeble now, took particular personal pride in my having a part in a successful West End 生産／産物. Though she never said so, I think Granny felt 内密に 責任がある having started me on my career.
As I went from revue to revue, in each show I was given more to do. This, of course, brought more prestige and, on my part, more self-保証／確信. I still played いたずらs, and the more I played, the more daring I became. Not unnaturally, André Charlot got a little fed up with me. He said so more than once in no unvarnished 条件.
While I was playing in Buzz-Buzz, I （機の）カム 負かす／撃墜する with a bad attack of lumbago. The doctor ordered me to bed. I was laid up for the better part of a week. When Saturday night （機の）カム, I was feeling much better than I had felt for several days. The doctor said I would be able to go 支援する to work on Monday. That evening Ivor Novello rang me up. He'd heard I had lumbago, and he 手配中の，お尋ね者 to know how I was getting on.
"I'm better," I said. "In fact, I'm working again Monday."
"Wonderful, darling," （機の）カム Ivor's 発言する／表明する over the wire.
"Ethel Baird is 開始 tonight in her new show, Summer Time. Bobbie Andrews and I have got a box. A lot of us are going. Why not come along, too, darling?"
"How can I?" I said.
"But you're much better, darling," Ivor 示唆するd. "My dear girl, do ask the doctor to let you come."
I began to get the idea. "Of course I could （犯罪の）一味 up my doctor and ask him what he thinks," I wavered.
"Wonderful," Ivor 認可するd. "He's sure to say it would do you no end of good to get out of that stuffy room and have a bit of fun."
"I'll see what he says," I 約束d. "I'll （犯罪の）一味 up and ask him if he thinks it would 傷つける me to go."
The doctor gave, as his opinion, that I would be no worse if I went to the 開始, 供給するd I （機の）カム straight home and went 直接／まっすぐに to bed. "No staying out dancing all night," he 命令（する）d.
"Oh, I wouldn't think of it," I said あわてて.
I 敏速に rang up Ivor and told him to come around and fetch me.
The 開始 was a very smart one; everybody was there. It was wonderful sitting in the 行う／開催する／段階 box with Ivor, watching the celebrities come in. I was sitting in the 前線 of the box, not to 行方不明になる a thing, when who should come 負かす／撃墜する the 中心 aisle but André Charlot and his wife. Before I could slither between Ivor and Bobbie into obscurity behind them, André Charlot's 注目する，もくろむs were 解除するd and swept the 行う／開催する／段階 boxes. I felt his gaze 停止（させる） and 直す／買収する，八百長をする itself 直接／まっすぐに on my 直面する. "That's done it," I thought. "He'll be furious, of course."
When Monday evening （機の）カム, I arrived at the 行う／開催する／段階 door, as chipper as you please. Old George, the doorman, looked at me reprovingly. He 封鎖するd the doorway. "I'm sorry, 行方不明になる," he said. "I've got my orders not to let you in."
"Oh, come off it, George," I said.
Old George shook his 長，率いる. "Sorry, 行方不明になる, I've had my orders. Straight from Mr. Charlot himself they （機の）カム. You're not to be let in. Not any more. You're 解雇する／砲火／射撃d."
"What about my part?" I 需要・要求するd.
"Jessie Matthews is going on for you, 行方不明になる. She's making up now. Here, I've got a 公式文書，認める for you." He produced a 調印（する）d envelope and 手渡すd it to me.
The 公式文書，認める was from André Charlot himself. He made no bones about it. He was 解雇する／砲火／射撃ing me from Buzz-Buzz. I had been absent more than six 業績／成果s which, under the 条件 of my 契約, permitted him to 取り消す it and to engage someone else to take my place. "If you are 井戸／弁護士席 enough to go to other people's plays, you are 井戸／弁護士席 enough to come to your own," the 公式文書，認める ended.
I tried to get him on the telephone, but he was not at his home, and no one there would tell me where he was. Finally, after かなりの 作戦行動ing, I 位置を示すd him at a hotel in the country and rang him there. I 簡単に couldn't believe that he would 解雇する／砲火／射撃 me for such a little thing as staying out one night more than my illness made necessary. Why, time and again he had forgiven me much worse 罪／違反s than that. But now Charlot was 感情を害する／違反するd and angry, and 会社／堅い in his 決意 to teach me a lesson. He gave me to understand in no uncertain 条件 that he had had enough of my nonsense. "You've been asking for this for a long time," he snapped. Then he hung up, leaving me gasping.
There was no getting 一連の会議、交渉／完成する it. I had been 解雇（する）d. Already the story was probably traveling like wildfire through the theaters of the West End. I could just imagine how some of the wiser ones would smile over the news that Gertrude Lawrence had been told off for 存在 too smart. "Played one trick too many, Gertie has."
It was barely a fortnight to Christmas, and I was out of a 職業.
From （軍の）野営地，陣営 Tanner on the 広い地所 of the Earl of Chichester our orders were to proceed to Arundel, where a large R.A.F. 中心 was 位置を示すd. On the short 運動 we passed の近くに to Bognor, with its memories of my childhood holiday when I sang on the sands. Those sands were now バリケードd with barbed wire and the sea 前線 was patrolled by guards and 保護するd by big guns.
That night our 部隊 played for the group at Arundel. After the show we visited the "ゆらめく Path" and watched the Spitzes and Mosquitoes coming in from their （警察の）手入れ，急襲s over フラン. These boys had 現実に played a part in the 広大な／多数の／重要な 侵略. They had covered the armies 群れているing up the beaches and fighting their way into the coast towns. And here they were 支援する again....
Two of the boys we talked to in the 乗組員 room, where the 操縦するs を待つ their calls for 要点説明, had bagged Nazis that day. They were 静かな, modest young men, with 有望な, （疑いを）晴らす 注目する，もくろむs and ready smiles. Nothing nervy or high-strung about them that anyone could see.
Next day we モーターd along the south coast, one hundred miles to Canterbury. All Sussex and Kent were a 広大な 武装した （軍の）野営地，陣営—a 調印（する）d 貯蔵所 of men and 軍需品s waiting to be フェリー（で運ぶ）d over to Normandy. In most of the old churches in the villages we drove through were tombs of Norman knights who had crossed the Channel with William the 征服者／勝利者's invaders.
Canterbury was a shock. The town was 不正に 爆弾d during the last blitz, when Hitler seemed to have decided to go after all England's cathedrals. But here again, as with St. Paul's, he 行方不明になるd. The beautiful minster still stood, pathetically lovely in the 中央 of a surrounding 荒廃. We did our show under canvas at 橋（渡しをする） （軍の）野営地，陣営. It was all very 原始の, but the boys gave us a 広大な／多数の／重要な 手渡す and were touchingly appreciative of our 成果／努力s to entertain them. These men were 特殊部隊員s and 特別奇襲隊員s, boys from every 明言する／公表する in the Union, who yowled with delight when I sang them songs they 認めるd as American. They, too, were を待つing orders to leave for Normandy at any hour.
From Canterbury 支援する to London and a letdown from the high excitement that 勝つ／広く一帯に広がるd all along the south coast. The excitement and singing in the barn 近づく Chichester had given me a sore throat. I gargled sedulously, 決定するd not to be laid up.
This time we 長，率いるd north into Bedfordshire. The fat farms smiled at us. British people have always loved the countryside, but now you felt that that love was いっそう少なく romantic than 以前は. You saw people 現実に smacking their lips at the sight of 列／漕ぐ／騒動s of 幅の広い beans, or six ducklings waddling in 選び出す／独身 とじ込み／提出する 負かす／撃墜する a green bank to a pond.
We did our show in Bedford's city hall that night to an audience of twenty-six hundred mixed 軍隊／機動隊s. The 市長 and mayoress were there and there were speeches and photographs and flowers—really a 祝祭.
I got 支援する late to The Swan, not feeling at all 井戸／弁護士席. Fortunately we had a 静かな night—no 空襲s. We were all up 早期に the next morning to モーター twenty-three miles 支援する to Luton to put on a factory show at "Electrolux." Luton, with its wonderful 見解（をとる）s of the Chilterns, used to 製造（する） hats, both felt and straw. The straw was 輸入するd from Japan and from Italy—one 推論する／理由 why the Luton 労働者s are not turning out straw boaters this season. Luton still makes its own beer, and very good beer it is, 特に after you've been singing out of doors to a lunch-hour （人が）群がる.
We put on another show that night for the R.A.F. in a 非，不，無-操作の base. The 気温 in the hut was 102 degrees. I went home after the show and to bed, where I stayed for the next four days. I kept begging Mary Barrett to dose me and to cover up the fact that I was ill. I went through anxious hours, hoping the 圧力（をかける） wouldn't get 持つ／拘留する of the story. If that had happened, it might have 妨げるd me from getting to the second 前線, as I had been 約束d.
From Bedford we drove more than two hundred miles 支援する to the busy south coast and the Southampton area. We 設立する everyone there talking about the new "pilotless 計画（する）s" which were beginning to come over and about which there had been 噂するs. There were three 警報s during our first night in Portsmouth. The south coast had always been a 的 for the Luftwaffe, but the boys along that coast were watching for the "doodlebugs," as the Americans called them. The things were 証明するing more deadly than had been 推定する／予想するd. As they 爆発するd on 接触する, or on time, and without 警告, it was almost impossible to find safety if one were caught within distance of the 爆破. There were a lot of 死傷者s in and around Southampton and, we heard, in London. Our Red Cross nurse at Drury 小道／航路 was killed by one of them.
For a week we did shows in テントs, hangars, 守備隊 theaters, and under trees. Each time the men would be gone the next morning. It gave one a 沈むing feeling to realize that these men were 現実に going into 戦う／戦い with the song in their hearts they had heard you sing only a few hours before. I had brought a new song with me when I （機の）カム 支援する to the big Southampton area, "All's 井戸／弁護士席, Mademoiselle." It was written for me on D-Day by Michael Carr and Tommy Connor. I had thousands of copies printed, and as I sang it I 手渡すd out the autographed copies to the boys and got them to sing it with me:
[The quotation which follows of lines from the song has been omitted from this ebook for 推論する／理由s of copyright.]
My diary gives the story of my experience in London when the robots began to rain 負かす／撃墜する on the city:
...Sunday night. I am in bed at the Savoy. 10:00 P.M. 警報 just gone. Wonder if it's Hitler's dirty 飛行機で行くing bugs again? The window in my bedroom is broken from the 爆破 concussion. But part of Cherbourg is ours tonight; so who cares?...1:00 A.M. Three of the 血まみれの things have just fallen outside. You hear the beastly droning; then it stops; then it 爆発するs. The whole hotel shudders and my curtains blow into the room from the 爆破.... 1:50 A.M. One more has just 炎d over and dropped with a terrific bang 近づく by. The 立ち往生させる seems to be the popular 的 for tonight! Next door a couple are making love. Here comes another! And now it's raining hard to make things harder for the A.R.P. 救助（する） 労働者s. That couple must be fatalists. Wouldn't Hitler be furious at their 完全にする unconcern?... There's another. That makes six around here up to now. And our 連合させるd 空気／公表する 軍隊s are supposed to have been 大打撃を与えるing at the robot bases every day.... Seven! More rain. 静かな next door now. Eight! What a night! 港／避難所't heard a 発射 from our guns, but I don't see how they can 位置／汚点／見つけ出す them. The 発射物s just seem to come over like 花火s on the fifth of November. Nine! It is now two-fifteen. Not much なぎ. The krauts must be having a gleeful evening across the Channel. This 肉親，親類d of 戦争 costs them no 操縦するs. I wonder if Hitler has it all arranged so that he can sit at home and 押し進める a button that 解雇する／砲火／射撃s the wretched things? Ten and eleven. Two at once that time. Now they are coming in pairs. It's no use trying to sleep in a tin hat, and it looks pretty silly, 特に when one is alone, so I shall just have to sit up and 記録，記録的な／記録する this my first real experience of 存在 blindly blitzed by robots....
It really is a strange and utterly helpless feeling—not one sound of a 計画（する） of ours 総計費, or any 試みる／企てる at 砲火; just these oncoming, droning, phantom ミサイルs 負担d with 破壊. My room is on a small 中庭, so I can see nothing, but the 爆発s have been very violent. Much 損失 must be 存在 done. 存在 Sunday, and this a 商売／仕事 section, there may not be many 死傷者s, but the 所有物／資産／財産 loss will be 広大な／多数の／重要な. It is now 2:45 A.M. It gets light around 5:00 A.M. Soon I can open my curtains and get some fresh 空気／公表する. Not that the daylight stops the "doodlebugs."
I was just going to 令状 "guess it's all over for tonight," but here comes Charlie again, making a 一連の会議、交渉／完成する dozen since one o'clock. The 警報 has been on since ten—five hours 安定した. I'm getting very sleepy.... Here's another one coming—thirteen. I 収容する／認める I got out of and under the bed that time. It was too の近くに to be comfortable, and I don't like 半端物 numbers. But it passed 権利 総計費 and crumped 負かす／撃墜する さらに先に away. Golly! That seemed like "this is it" for a while.
3:45 A.M. Maybe I should put 負かす／撃墜する the date—Monday, June 26. Sixteen and seventeen have just landed 権利 outside. I can hear the A.R.P. at work. Those last two were 火山の. How many more? I suppose this is 報復 for Cherbourg.
Four o'clock just chimed, and number eighteen has come 負かす／撃墜する with an awful bump. It must have 攻撃する，衝突する a 力／強力にする 駅／配置する or something. This is truly a nightmare. The 空気／公表する is 十分な of sudden death, coming at us from all 味方するs, without 停止. I 港／避難所't the 神経 to take this 肉親，親類d of 爆破, 特に when I'm alone. I get to thinking...thinking...
Lying awake in the ghostly half-light alone, listening for the drone of the buzz 爆弾s as they （機の）カム over, 持つ／拘留するing myself 緊張した through the moment of agonizing suspense, waiting for the 衝突，墜落 of their 上陸, I 設立する myself living through the 空襲 that 激しく揺するd London the night my daughter Pamela was born.
When André Charlot 取り消すd my 契約 with him, I すぐに went over to the London Hippodrome to see if I could get a part in the Christmas 生産／産物, which was 予定 to open there in a few days. But I was told there was nothing for me. A few more 調査s made it （疑いを）晴らす to me that it wasn't going to be 平易な to land a 職業 すぐに. The news had gone 一連の会議、交渉／完成する that I was impossible to manage.
I needed to get to work 権利 away. I had very little money saved up, barely enough to keep me if I remained out of work for more than a fortnight. I have never been thrifty. Goodness knows I wish I were. From the day I began to work and to earn money, I've always spent what I earned. I don't think it ever occurred to me that I would be out of work and unable to earn a living. So, as the money （機の）カム in, it went out—for myself and for others, and for things that seemed to me necessary, or 利益／興味ing, or 価値（がある） while.
Though there were no 開始s at the theaters, I thought I might have some success as an 芸能人 at Murray's Club. Murray's was London's first night club. It had just been started, and it was 製図／抽選 big （人が）群がるs, 特に the young officers on leave. I went 一連の会議、交渉／完成する to see the 経営者／支配人 and was auditioned. He engaged me to start at once. He was glad to get a youngster from Charlot's Revue who might be 推定する／予想するd to draw 貿易（する）. There I directed and put on the first 床に打ち倒す show in a London night club.
At the same time I understudied Phyllis Dare in the Hippodrome pantomime.
Murray's was a gay 位置／汚点／見つけ出す in 戦時 London. It was the smart place to go for supper and dancing, a place where the music and the girls and the ワイン and the cabaret helped people forget the heartbreaking 敗北・負かす at Kut-el-Amara and the blow to British prestige.
It was one of the tensest periods of the war. Everyone felt it. Everyone was edgy, nervous, overtired, and 猛烈に 決定するd to keep up a 前線 at any cost, so the theater 繁栄するd. One night André Charlot appeared at Murray's and asked me to join him at his （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する. He said he 手配中の，お尋ね者 to （不足などを）補う, and I was as glad about this as he 明白に was. I 手配中の，お尋ね者 us to be friends, and I 手配中の，お尋ね者—and said so 率直に—to get a place in his next revue. But, 式のs, there was nothing for me in it. I've often wondered if Charlot wasn't just 存在 canny; whether he wasn't 決定するd to find out, before he re-engaged me, whether I really had settled 負かす／撃墜する and could be 信用d to behave myself.
一方／合間, I got together a 二塁打 行為／法令／行動する with Walter Williams, who had been in some of Charlot's revues. We opened at the London Coliseum and 小旅行するd the 回路・連盟 of the Moss Empire theaters which were scattered through the 重要な cities. The 行為／法令／行動する was an enormous success. We used numbers from old Charlot's revues, and as we were 法案d "straight from London," we always topped every 法案. I danced, and Walter's big 攻撃する，衝突する song was "K-K-Katie."
(Poor Walter was killed by a direct-爆弾 攻撃する，衝突する during the London blitz three years ago. When he went I lost a 広大な／多数の／重要な friend who helped me when I needed it.)
At that time my own personal life was 占領するing more and more of my attention. I was engaged to a boy who was serving in the balloon 一斉射撃，（質問などの）連発／ダム which floated over London. Whenever I would look up and see the big balloons bobbing lazily above the roofs and spires, like 泡s rising in an enormous glass of シャンペン酒, I had a cozy feeling of 保護. My boy was up there looking out for me and for our city. He had taken me to 会合，会う his parents; he'd given me a （犯罪の）一味—a sapphire surrounded by little diamonds—which I adored and wore proudly. Someday, when the war was over, we'd get married. 一方／合間, we were together whenever his hours permitted it. He'd turn up at Murray's, or I'd come off the 行う／開催する／段階 at one of the London music halls where Walter Williams and I were playing, and there would be Peter sitting in the dressing room, waiting for me.
Then all at once something happened—I met Frank Howley. He was twenty years my 上級の and I was immensely flattered by his attention. Moreover, he belonged to my world—the world of the theater. He spoke my language—that of the theater. He was a director, and he talked to me of his 未来 計画（する）s in which I 人物／姿／数字d as his 星／主役にする.
When I went out with Peter, he was not 利益／興味d in 審理，公聴会 me talk about the theater. He didn't take the theater 本気で, and he couldn't understand why I did. His 計画（する） for us was to get married and for me to leave the profession at once ーするために turn myself into the 従来の type of young wife—the 肉親，親類d of wife his people would 認可する of for him. The more I thought of it, the surer I became that this was no part that I would ever 星／主役にする in. I could play a lot of 役割s, but not that of young Mrs. Peter.
Frank had no family problem. His brothers 認可するd of me, though they exclaimed with surprise on 会合 me: "My God, Frank, she doesn't wear any make-up!"
The more I thought about Peter and the life he pictured to me, and to which he, 明らかに, looked 今後 as though it was the most wonderful 存在 in the world, the more 確かな I became that it was not the life for me. So I broke our 約束／交戦. Peter took it hard, but gallantly. He was a romantic, and he 辞退するd to let me give him 支援する his （犯罪の）一味. "Keep it," he said, "and wear it to remember me by. I shall remember you always."
Frank and I were married—静かに and without interrupting my work. Mother disapproved, but there was nothing she could do about it, as I was economically 独立した・無所属. She thought Frank was too old for me, and she reminded me of her own unfortunate marriage with my father, who was also in the profession.
There's no 疑問 Mother would have liked me to have been young Mrs. Peter. It would have 正当化するd all her 成果／努力s to bring me up like a lady. Granny, however, had had her 疑惑s about my 約束／交戦 to Peter from the start. Granny liked people who knew what world they belonged to, and who stayed inside that world. "You may not be 豊富な with Frank," she said to me 静かに, "but money isn't everything. It isn't the most important thing in life. Not nearly so important as doing what you feel you have to do 同様に as you're able to do it."
We went to live in Maida Vale. We had a flat, and Frank's two brothers stayed with us whenever they were in London. Frank began looking around for 財政上の 支援 to start a company of his own. 一方／合間, I went on with my theater work, doing my 職業 as a housewife, and understudying Bea Lillie, whom Charlot was featuring in the 現在の show. I was terribly 感謝する to Charlot for taking me on again, and I kept hoping he would find a real place for me in one of the revues before long. I didn't wish Bea any bad luck, but I couldn't help longing for a chance to show Charlot—and the audience—what I could do. In that ambition, and in the fantasies that I built up around it, I suppose I was just like every other understudy in the world.
Then I learned I was going to have a child. I was excited and thrilled.
"You should give up your work," the doctor advised.
"How can I?" I shrugged my shoulders. I couldn't explain that my husband was not 収入 anything at the time.
The doctor frowned. "It is usually possible to do whatever it is necessary to do," he said. "At least I have 設立する this to be true."
"Oh, I agree with you," I told him.
If my own experience had taught me anything, it was that, if a thing had to be done, it could be done. Of course it would be wonderful to be so 井戸／弁護士席 off you could coddle yourself. But then I had never been in that 明言する／公表する of 財政上の 緩和する. Doctors, I told myself, were always telling you to 残り／休憩（する） and relax and not to worry. They gave you that sort of advice spontaneously and 自由に. It was part of the 決まり文句／製法. They must know that an actress couldn't かもしれない stop working for months 簡単に because she was going to have a baby. I had known dozens of girls who had gone on working until just before their babies were born. I 妥協d by 約束ing myself that I would work as long as I could; then I would stay home and obey the doctor's orders.
合間, I had a 広大な／多数の／重要な 取引，協定 to keep me 占領するd. The flat took a lot of attention. We couldn't afford a servant, not even a daily. I did all the cooking, and, in 新規加入, I made my baby's 着せる／賦与するs—sewing them by 手渡す with all the dainty stitches Granny had taken such 苦痛s to teach me. There was no money to waste, but I 手配中の，お尋ね者 my baby to have the best I could give it. I bought a wicker 着せる／賦与するs-basket and lined it with padding and covered it with pink silk to make a bassinet, like the expensive ones I had seen in the shops in Regent Street.
One evening, when it （機の）カム time to start for the theater, I felt very ill. I said to myself, "I can't かもしれない go to work tonight." As general understudy I was under 契約 to 報告（する）／憶測 at the theater for every 業績／成果 in 事例／患者 I was needed.
Then I thought, "I'll have to call up the theater. That means I've got to go out to the corner to the telephone. By the time I've dressed and done that, I might 同様に hop a bus and go there, 報告（する）／憶測, and come home again."
It was late when I arrived, which was unusual for me. I should have checked in at seven-thirty, but it was ten minutes of eight when I turned into the alley which led to the 行う／開催する／段階 door. There was the 行う／開催する／段階 経営者／支配人, walking up and 負かす／撃墜する, muttering and ガス／煙ing. There was the callboy, running this way and that. Several 長，率いるs stuck out of dressing-room windows. Then the 行う／開催する／段階 経営者／支配人 caught sight of me.
"For God's sake!" he yelled. "Come on! Where the hell have you been?"
I started to tell him I was ill, but he paid no attention. Instead, he caught 持つ／拘留する of my 肘, hurried me up the steps and in through the 行う／開催する／段階 door.
"Lillie's off," he shouted. "Went riding in Hyde Park, and the horse threw her. Concussion, they say she's got. You've got to go on. We're 持つ／拘留するing the curtain for you. Buck up, my girl. Here's your chance. Remember we're counting on you."
My chance—the chance I'd longed for for years. The chance every understudy dreams about—the 星／主役にする suddenly ill, or 会合 with an 事故, and the little understudy having to step in and take her place. Now this had happened to me. As I stood there in Bea's dressing room and her dresser helped me with swift, experienced fingers, I thought, "The irony of it. It has happened to me just now when I am feeling ill." The dresser looked at me encouragingly.
"You'll be all 権利, 行方不明になる."
In a couple of songs Bea was doing male impersonations. For these she wore a white tie and tails. The 黒人／ボイコット broadcloth 控訴 was 削減（する） perfectly and fitted her わずかな／ほっそりした, straight 団体／死体 like a glove. I held my breath while the dresser laced me up tightly; then I got into the trousers and white waistcoat. I stood before the long mirror and looked at myself 批判的に. Yes, I would do.
When my call （機の）カム, I went on, and for the first time in my life on the 行う／開催する／段階 I knew 苦悩. Bea was a tremendous favorite. Most of the audience had come on 目的 to see her. Could I 満足させる them? If I could 持つ／拘留する that audience, if I could make them laugh and applaud and like Gertrude Lawrence, then the 残り／休憩（する） of my career was 保証するd. If I failed, 井戸／弁護士席——My cue （機の）カム and I went on.
Standing in the wings, watching with a worried look on his 直面する, was André Charlot. I flashed him a smile. At eleven-thirty, after the final curtain, André Charlot kissed me on both cheeks and said: "井戸／弁護士席 done, Gertie."
That night, and for many nights thereafter, I sang and danced and 投げ上げる／ボディチェックするd my lines across the footlights with all the gaiety at my 命令（する）. I was no longer anxious—that first night had 証明するd to me that I could 持つ／拘留する the audience. I could make them laugh, applaud, and 元気づける, and come 支援する for more. I was doing it. I had 後継するd. The worried look was gone from Charlot's 直面する.
The 落ちる from her horse had 負傷させるd Bea Lillie so 不正に that she had to be out of the show for several months. This meant that Charlot would have to engage another 星／主役にする to 取って代わる her—a big 指名する—unless I, the understudy, could take the place and 持つ／拘留する the public. If I could, then my 評判 and prestige were made.
Night after night I bit my lips while the dresser laced me so tightly it was hard to get breath enough to sing. Each night, when I （機の）カム off the 行う／開催する／段階, Frank would be there, waiting. There （機の）カム a night when I was very ill and Frank 設立する a taxi for us. I sank into the corner of the seat and 倍のd my 武器 around myself tightly, trying to stop the 苦痛. Frank was arguing with the driver, who, as usual in 戦時, 反対するd to going so far. He 申し込む／申し出d him five shillings extra, and grudgingly the man agreed to take us. Frank got in beside me and put his 武器 around my waist. His tenderness was a 慰安, and the warm 圧力 of his 手渡すs 緩和するd the 苦痛. Suddenly the electric light in the 支援する of the cab was switched on; the driver drew up and swung around in his seat. "Now then, 非，不，無 of that, you two," he growled. "Not in my cab you don't."
"What's the 事柄?" Frank 需要・要求するd.
"Never mind what's the 事柄," said the driver. "You know all 権利. I seen ya in the mirror, I did."
"Listen," said Frank, his 発言する／表明する steely. "This lady happens to be my wife."
"Coo," said the driver. "Lady, my word! I've heard that tale before. Get on with you now, get out of my cab."
"We're not getting out. You've agreed to take us to Maida Vale, and that is what you are going to do. I've told you, this lady is my wife. She's going to have a baby, and I've got to get her home as 急速な／放蕩な as you can make it."
The driver 発射 a 尋問 look at me. I nodded. "If you don't get me there soon," I said, "I'm afraid I shall faint."
The driver switched off the light, stepped on the accelerator, and the cab 発射 out of the Edgeware Road with a 揺さぶる that nearly landed me on the 床に打ち倒す. I gasped out loud. "My God, Missus, don't have it in my cab," the cabby yelled.
The 空襲s on London were 増加するing. There was a 殴打／砲列 of anti-航空機 guns in the 法廷，裁判所 outside our windows. The noise they made 妨げるd anyone from sleeping, and there was always the danger of shrapnel from our own 爆撃するs 同様に as from the German 爆弾s. I began to get jumpy, 特に after a piece of shrapnel （機の）カム sailing into our room one night and embedded itself in the 塀で囲む.
One day Frank told me he had got word of something in Liverpool that might be good. At least, it sounded 約束ing. He went off to look it over. His two brothers were staying with us in Maida Vale, but both of them were 負かす／撃墜する with influenza. I went to the theater that night as usual. I did not feel at all 井戸／弁護士席, but some of that I laid to the fact that I had had a lot to do in the house that day, getting Frank off and nursing his two brothers. My 勧める was to clean everything. I took 負かす／撃墜する the curtains from the windows, washed them, and hung them up again, wet. I went over all the things I had 用意が出来ている for the baby. For several nights past I had not slept 井戸／弁護士席, as the Zeps had been coming over. I felt so faint while I was dressing, the dresser became alarmed. She brought me out a stiff drink of brandy, and 主張するd that I take it just before going on. The brandy warmed me and 重要なd up my spirits. I gave one of my best 業績／成果s. I knew it was my last night because Bea was returning the に引き続いて Monday. The house kept applauding and calling me 支援する for an encore. Twice—three times I went 支援する. I could see the 行う／開催する／段階 経営者／支配人 standing in the wings, smiling 概して. When I got 支援する to the dressing room to change, and the excitement began to wear off, I felt very ill indeed.
"It's good it's a Saturday night," the dresser said. "You can go home and 残り／休憩（する） all day tomorrow and Monday."
"That's true," I said gratefully.
When I left the theater, the street was dark and 静かな. I stood there, wishing a taxi would come by, but 非，不，無 （機の）カム. Every minute I felt worse and worse. The thought of going out to Maida Vale, going in a bus if no taxi was to be 設立する, was more than I could 耐える. I thought, "I'd better go home to Mother. She'll look out for me until Frank gets 支援する from Liverpool." A bus （機の）カム by, going toward Piccadilly, and I hopped 船内に. I would have to change at Piccadilly Circus for Clapham. I got out there and joined the （人が）群がる at the 抑制（する）, praying I wouldn't have to wait long. Minutes passed. Busses for Richmond and Shepherd's Bush and Peckham, busses for the Elephant and 城, busses for Hounslow and Ealing and Wormwood Scrubs （機の）カム 板材ing 負かす／撃墜する on us, stopped to let off and take on 乗客s, and went 板材ing on again. Every minute I waited 増加するd the agony of physical 苦痛 and terror. The bobby kept looking at me anxiously.
"Where do you want to go, 行方不明になる?" he 問い合わせd.
"Clapham." Then I 追加するd, "I'm ill. I'm going to have a baby."
"Then you shouldn't go there by bus," said the bobby 事実上.
"I know," I said, "but the taxis don't want to go so far."
The 法律 blew its whistle. A 巡航するing taxi （機の）カム obediently to the 抑制（する）. The bobby opened the door and helped me in. He gave the driver the 演説（する）／住所, and then out of 尊敬（する）・点 to a lady's feelings he whispered something, confidentially, in the driver's ear.
We started, and the man spoke over his shoulder to me: "I'll get you there, lady. I'm a married man myself."
Mother was home when I got there, and Dad let me in. Mother took one look at me, and not waiting for me to say anything, she called Dad to make haste and 持つ／拘留する the taxi. "You'll go 権利 to the nursing home," she said to me, "tonight."
"But," I 反対するd, "the baby isn't 予定 for nearly two months."
"Nonsense," said Mother; "you can't tell a thing about a first baby." She bustled me out and into the taxi again and on to a nursing home, where I was すぐに put to bed.
That night, and through the next, the Germans 扱う／治療するd London to one of the worst 空襲s of the war. On Monday night, while the （警察の）手入れ，急襲 was at its 高さ, my daughter was born. The sound she heard on coming into this world was the 衝突，墜落 of 爆弾s. All her life she has loathed the sound of 計画（する）s.
No one, 明らかに, had thought to 通知する André Charlot that I was in a nursing home. On Sunday and Monday I had been much too ill to think of anything. On Tuesday morning I received a card from the 行う／開催する／段階 経営者／支配人 to remind 行方不明になる Lawrence that a rehearsal had been called for Monday, at which she had failed to appear. The doctor sent a letter in reply, 説 that 行方不明になる Lawrence was さもなければ engaged on Monday!
On Tuesday Frank （機の）カム to see me, bringing a bunch of poppies. Of course he was pleased about the baby, but he was terribly worried too. He sat by my bed, looking very downcast. The prospect in Liverpool had turned out to be another 失望.
"How long will you have to stay here?" he asked.
"Ten days," I told him. The doctor had said, "Three weeks," but I knew I must get 支援する to work before that.
Frank's 直面する grew longer. He hadn't a bean, and we were behind with the rent. His brothers were still laid up, and they had no money either. "I don't know which way to turn," he said.
I was unable to 示唆する anything. All I 手配中の，お尋ね者 was to be 許すd to stay there in that 冷静な／正味の, clean bed—and 残り／休憩（する）. I was so tired. My 手渡すs, lying on the coverlet, seemed too 激しい to 解除する. On the left 手渡す, next to my wedding （犯罪の）一味, was the sapphire （犯罪の）一味 Peter had given me. Silently I drew it off and held it out to my husband. There was no need to say anything. Frank dropped the sapphire into his waistcoat pocket and the 苦悩 解除するd from his 直面する. He bent, kissed my cheek, and went away.
I never saw Peter's （犯罪の）一味 again.
We 指名するd the baby Pamela. It was a beautiful, romantic 指名する. She was to have two others—Barbara after her father's sister who was a 修道女, and May because she had arrived in that proverbially merry month.
Just then the 指名する Pamela did not seem at all suitable for the tiny bluish little 捨てる of humanity which I held to my breast so proudly.
Premature babies, I was 知らせるd, were difficult to 後部. They had to have special care, special food, and constant 監視. Dr. Ambrose said bluntly that the 推論する／理由 Pamela was a seven-months baby was because I had worked so hard, coupled with the 緊張する of the 空気／公表する （警察の）手入れ，急襲s.
During the fortnight I was in the nursing home I had time to take 在庫／株 of a 広大な／多数の／重要な many things. First, my 責任／義務 toward my child. Pam 要求するd 専門家, expensive care, and this meant I would have to get 支援する to work as soon as possible. I had brought her into the world; she belonged to me as no one and nothing else in my life ever had belonged. I would fight to keep her alive and to help her grow up strong and beautiful.
André and Madame Charlot were real friends. Though they never について言及するd it, they were aware of my predicament. Charlot let me go 支援する to work as understudy, and I had 推論する／理由 to believe he meant to give me a real part of my own in the new show. I was still pretty weak, 自然に, but overjoyed at the わずかな／ほっそりした silhouette the mirror now 現在のd.
To 会合，会う the new expenses connected with Pamela, the flat in Maida Vale would have to be given up. We could live with Mother and Dad for a time and the baby could stay in the nursing home. This, I thought, would 始める，決める Frank's mind at 残り／休憩（する）, and he would be 解放する／自由な to take on the direction of companies on 小旅行する.
By the time I was ready to leave the nursing home I had it all worked out, but Frank 反対するd. Therefore I left the nursing home with Pamela, returned to the flat, and tried for several weeks to carry on. I bathed, fed, and walked the baby until midday. Then Mother would come over and take care of the baby while I went to work. After a while it became obvious we couldn't continue in this way, so we gave up the flat and went to live with Mother and Dad. Her dining room on the ground 床に打ち倒す was turned into a bedroom for us. After a few more weeks we decided to put the baby 支援する in the nursing home, where she would get 専門家 care. I went on with my work with an easier mind.
On my 解放する／自由な days I would go to the nursing home to visit Pamela. The matron didn't encourage 訪問者s. The home was understaffed, 借りがあるing to the war, and the nurses were overworked. That was the year of the influenza 疫病／流行性の, and 訪問者s in hospitals and nursing homes, who might carry the 感染 to 患者s, were not encouraged. Either Mother or I called around at the nursing home to 問い合わせ about the baby every few days. Between those times we 満足させるd our curiosity by means of telephone calls.
Frank had not been successful in finding something he 手配中の，お尋ね者 to do. Finally the break （機の）カム.
"It's no good going on like this," he said. "We're not getting anywhere."
I could see he was 傷つける, but I had all I could do just then to take care of myself and to 支払う／賃金 the 法案s for Pamela at the nursing home. Frank finally left. He said we wouldn't hear from him again in a hurry. A few days later I caught the flu and didn't dare visit my baby.
It was several days later that Mother went 一連の会議、交渉／完成する in my に代わって to the nursing home to 支払う／賃金 the 法案 and to 問い合わせ about Pam's 進歩.
"The baby's not here," the matron said.
"Not here?"
"Certainly not. You didn't 推定する／予想する to find her here, did you?"
"What's become of her?" Mother 需要・要求するd.
"The child's father （機の）カム the day before yesterday and took her away."
Mother hurried 支援する to the house to tell me what the matron had said.
"It can't be true!" I 反対するd. "I'm 支払う／賃金ing for the baby's care. How could Frank—or anyone—take her away?"
I got up out of bed and Mother and I went to see the matron. "Where did he take the baby?" I 需要・要求するd.
She told me briskly: "To Liverpool. I understand the child's father's parents live there."
Somehow I felt Frank wouldn't do a thing like that. The matron was very short with me—suspiciously so. When I 需要・要求するd more 限定された （警察などへの）密告，告訴（状）, she finally 自白するd that the baby was still in the home, but she was under strict orders from the child's father not to 許す me to see her.
When there was nothing to be done with the matron, I went to the police 駅／配置する. There I was told that, under the 法律, a father could 演習 完全にする 裁判権 over his child. The fact that I had paid the 法案s at the nursing home did not alter the 法律. However, the 法廷，裁判所 認めるd me 許可 to see my child. Mother and I returned to the nursing home and brandished the 法廷，裁判所 order in the 直面する of the matron and I 需要・要求するd my 権利s. She was a tall, bony, equine woman, and she 明白に 設立する us a 広大な／多数の／重要な nuisance. She said stonily: "That baby is no longer here."
"You told me that before," I reminded her. "Later, you said the child was here. Surely you don't 推定する／予想する me to believe you now."
"No," she said 正確に，正当に. "I can やめる see why you wouldn't, but you can come with me and see for yourself."
We went through the nursery but there was no 調印する of Pamela.
I went 支援する to the police 駅／配置する. Surely, I said, something could be done to help me find my child, but again I was brought 直面する to 直面する with the British 法律, which has its roots in the patriarchal age—because Frank was Pamela's father, he was 合法的に 許すd to 配置する／処分する／したい気持ちにさせる of her as he wished without 協議するing me.
I went posthaste to the lodgings where I thought Frank had been living since we broke up. He was no longer there. Both his brothers were away on 小旅行する. I wrote Frank in care of his mother, the only 演説（する）／住所 I knew where he might be reached. There was no answer to my letter.
Weeks passed. No word from Frank. I went through my 決まりきった仕事 at the theater night after night like a robot.
Each day I told myself that there would surely be a message from Frank before that night. But 非，不，無 （機の）カム. Every evening when I went to the theater I 防備を堅める／強化するd myself with the thought that when I （機の）カム off the 行う／開催する／段階 at the end of the 業績／成果 I would find Frank waiting for me in my dressing room as he used to wait in the old days.
Then one afternoon when I （機の）カム off 行う／開催する／段階 old George was waiting for me with a 電報電信. I read it in a ちらりと見ること:
CHILD DESPERATELY ILL NEEDS YOU MEET ME USUAL PLACE FRANK.
I knew he meant Lyons' Corner House in Piccadilly, where he and I used to 会合，会う and in which we had planned our wedding.
I 投げ上げる／ボディチェックするd out the contents of my purse and counted the money. It 量d to very little. I knew the pawnshop which was 据えるd conveniently の近くに to the 行う／開催する／段階 door would still be open. We girls often took our trinkets there and thus raised a little much-needed cash.
I laid a chain purse and my watch on the 反対する and asked the man what he would let me have on them. There was no need for him to 検査／視察する the pieces; he knew them 井戸／弁護士席. They had been in and out of his 丸天井 times without number. He automatically counted out thirty shillings.
It was all he usually 許すd on the things, but in this 事例／患者 it was not enough for my 目的s. If Pamela were 猛烈に ill, as the wire 明言する／公表するd, she would need doctors, a nurse, special 薬／医学s. All those things （一定の）期間d money. I would need more than thirty shillings.
"Can't you give me more on them just this once?" I pleaded.
He shook his 長，率いる at me. "You know better than that, young lady."
"But I need the money 猛烈に. Thirty shillings isn't enough. I've got to have a fiver at least. Come on, be a sport."
Without a word he slid the things 支援する across the 反対する.
"You mean you won't?"
"Not me," he said. Then, unable to resist the impulse to scold those who have committed the sin of 存在 in need of money, he said 厳しく, "I've got ter teach you girls a lesson, I 'ave. The 管理／経営 支払う／賃金s you, don't it? Of course it do. What does a girl like you do with her money? Throws it around. You'd せねばならない be ashamed of yourself, you ought. You'd せねばならない have a tidy little sum put by in the 貯金 bank, and not come 一連の会議、交渉／完成する 推定する／予想するing me to give you fancy prices on stuff that's not 価値（がある） the half of it."
He was working himself up into a 罰金 明言する／公表する of righteous indignation. 一方／合間 time was passing. And I had to have the money.
I laid my little bits of 宝石類 支援する on the 反対する and put my problem to him unashamedly.
"I'll tell you what I do with my money," I said. "I have a baby. She's only a few months old. She's ill. 猛烈に ill. If you don't believe me, here's the wire from my husband to 証明する it."
I pulled the crumpled 電報電信 out of my pocket and held it out to him. "Go on, read it."
Deliberately he adjusted his spectacles and read Frank's message.
"I've got to go to her, don't you see. I've got to have the money. That's why I've come to you."
Without a word he turned and 打ち明けるd his money drawer. He took out five dirty 続けざまに猛撃する 公式文書，認めるs and put them in my 手渡す. Then he gathered up the 宝石類 and 手渡すd it over.
I started to thank him, but he 削減（する） me off.
"Take this stuff along with you. You can 支払う／賃金 me 支援する later."
It was a white-直面するd, 完全に 脅すd Frank who rose from the （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する to 会合，会う me when I arrived at the tea-shop. Neither of us spoke for a while. There was too much to say. Finally I asked, "Where's my baby, Frank? Where is she?"
He replied, "She's still in the nursing home. She's been there all the time."
I 星／主役にするd at him, unable to believe my ears. He then 自白するd that he had hoped, by taking the child, to bring me 支援する to him. Now he had 設立する out that he could not keep up the 支払い（額）s in the nursing home. Also the baby was 病んでいる and he had 約束d the matron to send for me.
Once again, and for the last time, he put it up to me:
"If you can lend me some money, I can go away and open an 学院 in the Midlands," he said. "And I won't trouble you and Pamela any more."
I gave him all I had—the contents of my purse. And then our life together ended in the same 位置／汚点／見つけ出す where we had planned our marriage.
Truly, a marvelous play could be written after the pattern of Grand Hotel, about the characters one finds in the 宿泊所s on the south coast of England during these days of war. Members of all the services come in at all times and in all sorts of dress. Many of them are straight from the 侵略 前線. Tired, dirty, hungry, thirsty, the men line up at the desk, asking for beds and baths. The invariable reply is: "Sorry. No rooms."
But though there are no rooms, and never a 十分な number of beds for the war 疲れた／うんざりした, by some sort of juggling 過程 that 国境s on the miraculous places are made for the newcomers. War has turned the old Box and Cox 状況／情勢, which was the basis of so many farces, into an everyday reality. One man drags himself, yawning, out of bed to make place for another whose only （人命などを）奪う，主張する is that he is, if possible, even wearier than the earlier comer.
The 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業 opens at twelve noon. By one-thirty the 在庫／株 on the 棚上げにするs is 完全に sold out. And still the men keep coming, pathetically 希望に満ちた of 残り／休憩（する） and refreshment. The hotel ロビー is strewn with duffel 捕らえる、獲得するs and other gear, which everyone つまずくs over. The swing doors 回転する ceaselessly.
At all hours of the day and night a 列 waits with 変化させるing degrees of patience before the door 示すd Bath. Standing in line, waiting my turn at the tub, I thought: It's like the Cats' Home. We girls used to 列 up like this before the one bath to a 床に打ち倒す. How often I've stood on the 冷淡な, linoleum-covered passage, warming one foot against the other, and sighed: "Shall I ever be rich enough to have a bath of my own?"
It was good to get 支援する to work after 存在 laid up with a froggy throat, and thrilling to be 支援する in the south coast area, which was now part of the second 前線. One morning I was told that 手はず／準備 had been made for us to go out to H.M.S. Tyns. The 海軍大将's 船 was sent to fetch us and we gave our first show at sea. Three hundred and fifty jolly jack-tars and their officers crammed the little theater-chapel-lecture cabin.
モーターing 支援する to London, one saw 証拠s on all 味方するs of the 破壊 wrought by the robot 計画（する）s. The （人が）群がるd 地区s of London were again hard 攻撃する，衝突する. We passed squares in which all the little houses and shops were 廃虚d. Though the 爆弾s had fallen hours earlier, they were still carrying the dead from the 廃虚s. But what broke my heart were the little homes, roofless, and exposed to the elements. It had been raining for forty-eight hours. Somehow there was something cruelly indecent about the （危険などに）さらす of those rooms with their pathetic furnishings. You knew that each of these 難破させるd homes had cost its owner all his life and his 貯金 to acquire.
In the 爆弾d-out 地区s neighbors were helping each other, 株ing the misfortune, the 苦悩, and the 悲劇 of death. The robots had broken the reserve which has always been a characteristic of British life. "Keep yourself to yourself," Mother used to say.
It is one more 証拠 of the enormity of the 災害 which London has undergone in this war that these people of Clapham and Wandsworth and Tooting no longer keep themselves to themselves. Everyone's misfortune now is 株d by everyone.
Though the rain 注ぐd pitilessly, children dug in the がれき 捜し出すing 着せる／賦与するing and toys. One man, after working for hours, had just 設立する his dog buried under a heap of 木材／素質s. The poor creature was terribly 負傷させるd. The man mercifully wrung its neck while he 悪口を言う／悪態d the Nazis.
I put in another sleepless night at the Savoy. The 警報 sounded at 1:00 A.M., and the 爆弾s （機の）カム over with clock-like precision every few minutes, until noon. Bush House was 攻撃する，衝突する, and other buildings in the 立ち往生させる. Still the rain kept up.
It was still 注ぐing when our 部隊 left London at two in the afternoon, 長，率いるd for 物陰／風下d and then for Catterick （軍の）野営地，陣営, the 広大な／多数の／重要な 軍の 中心 in Yorkshire.
When I woke next morning in the Queen's Hotel in 物陰／風下d, the sun was 向こうずねing. I felt happy as a lizard when he comes out of a clammy 割れ目 in a 塀で囲む and feels the sun's warmth on his 団体／死体.
Mary Barrett tapped on my door and called: "Happy birthday!" I had やめる forgotten.
It was July Fourth, my birthday and the birthday of the American nation. It was also the 周年記念日 of my marriage to Richard. All day I looked and hoped for some message from him. There were cables from my daughter Pamela and from many friends in America. Also a letter from Jack Potter, 経営者／支配人 of Lady in the Dark. But 非，不，無 from Richard. I knew what that meant—he was at sea. But I also knew, wherever he was, and whatever his 義務s, he was remembering the day and keeping it in his heart. As I was.
Poor Richard, I thought. He hasn't had much of a marriage with me up to now. We had only a short time together before Pearl Harbor. Since that day the war has 占領するd him. We have been like thousands of other couples, living on letters, building all our 計画（する）s on the words: "after the war."
Mary gave me my first birthday 現在の that day—a silver five-shilling piece, very rare. The news 漏れるd out that it was my birthday, and some of the men serenaded me and gave me flowers. There was one red, white, and blue bouquet which reminded me of the floral American 旗 which Archie Selwyn sent me on the Fourth of July before I made my first trip to America.
At Catterick I ran into Major Peter Mather, who was Helen Hayes's 小旅行するing 経営者／支配人 in Victoria Regina. He was eager to talk and ask about America and his friends there—Gilbert and Kitty Miller, Ruth Gordon, and a lot more. We discussed the 広大な／多数の／重要な 量 of good Helen had done for England by 小旅行するing America with Victoria Regina. There is no 疑問 that an honest, 井戸／弁護士席-conceived play, which really 代表するs the psychology of a nation, does more to 明らかにする／漏らす the spirit of that nation to the people of other countries than all the painfully and artfully built-up 宣伝 put out by 政府 bureaus. The American audiences who saw Victoria Regina were in a much better position to understand Britain. It is 悲劇の that no play to date has been written which honestly 明らかにする／漏らすs the American spirit. I hope with all my heart that not one but many plays will be written and produced which, by 明らかにする／漏らすing the American character and what goes on inside American minds and hearts, will make America more 理解できる to the British people.
Thinking along these lines, after my talk with Peter Mather, it occurred to me suddenly: "I wonder if people thought this way during and just after the last war. Or were we so cocksure the 悲劇 couldn't happen again that we forgot about the need of understanding between our two nations?"
During that winter which followed the armistice and before the 失業 危機 脅すd England, London, as I remember, was 十分な of Americans. Many of these were on leave before going home. Behind them, as behind the British men one met, were the horror, filth, and weariness of war. They 手配中の，お尋ね者, above all, to forget. They 手配中の，お尋ね者 to be gay....
November 11, 1918. The war was over. Everyone 手配中の，お尋ね者 to forget what war was like and the 悲しみs it had brought. Everyone was 決定するd not to be downhearted, not to worry about the 明言する／公表する of the 戦後の world, or the 未来. It was true most of the men one met at parties were either definitely middle-老年の or 明白に too young to have been in the war, and for every man, at every party, there were half-a-dozen girls. No one complained about this—it was one of the things you had to take, one of the things four years of war had done to British life. But this 欠如（する） of men and the superabundance of women had the 影響 of making the women 争う with one another to attract the attention of the men even more than women had done in other periods. This keen 競争 made society more brilliant, put an 辛勝する／優位 on parties. People did things and amused themselves in ways that would have seemed incredible five or six years before. Many of the old social 障壁s were 負かす／撃墜する and the field was open to all riders.
I reveled in the gaiety, which meant all the more to me because of the 緊張する I had been living under after the baby was born. I had taken a little flat on the fringe of Mayfair. Pam was still with Mother, and Granny was thrilled to have her.
The newspapers and illustrated 週刊誌s were making a 広大な／多数の／重要な to-do over Princess Mary's 来たるべき marriage to Lord Lascelles. It was 正確に／まさに the 肉親，親類d of event calculated to fill Granny with delight and to 利益／興味 her for weeks on end. H.R.H., the Prince of むちの跡s, was the leader of the young 始める，決める in London which had by now opened its doors to me.
P.W., as his intimates referred to him, had 実行するd all the 約束 I had 設立する in those 早期に photographs of him which I used to pin up beside my mirror. He was debonair, amusing, charming. He and his favorite younger brother, the Duke of Kent, went about in London's night life, enjoying themselves and spreading 楽しみ wherever they went.
My dressing room at the theater had two 入り口s—one from the passage 主要な to the 行う／開催する／段階; the other, an 緊急 出口, which opened 直接／まっすぐに from the alley. Many evenings the Prince of むちの跡s and the Duke of Kent would come up the alley, and old George, the doorman, would let them in. I'll never forget dashing into my dressing room one night between scenes to find the Duke of Kent seated before my mirror, trying on a wig of long, 誤った curls. The other members of his party were bedeviling poor Florrie, my dresser. I had been 現在のd to the Prince of むちの跡s by Captain Philip Astley, whom I had met at Mrs. Walter Guinness', and I can still see the long music room, with its gleaming parquet 床に打ち倒す, and Elsa Maxwell at the piano, as I walked across it that night with Beatrice Guinness, who whispered, "Gertrude, I want you to 会合，会う the handsomest man in London."
Philip was in the Guards. He was everything a knight in armor should be, as dreamed of by a young romantic girl. He was born at Chequers, which is now the 公式の／役人 country home of all British 首相s. He was christened in the 式服s of Oliver Cromwell, and educated at Eton and the 王室の 軍の College, 追加するd to which he was 猛烈に good-looking, and had unparalleled charm. We had to 落ちる in love with each other. It was as natural and 直感的に to us both as it was for us to breathe. There could be no thought of marriage for us. I was still married, and any question of 関与 in 離婚 訴訟／進行s would have 廃虚d Philip's career. So, although in love, we could only be good, stanch companions. He brought the first touch of true romance into my life.
Some nights after the play Philip would come and fetch me and we would join a 私的な party over at Roule's, the famous little restaurant in Maiden 小道／航路, which plays such an 利益／興味ing part in the theatrical history of London, just as the Cheshire Cheese in (n)艦隊／(a)素早い Street has always been associated with the literary and 合法的な gentlemen of the city. The 塀で囲むs of Roule's were lined with 調印するd photographs of actors and actresses, ボクシング 支持する／優勝者s, 閣僚 大臣s, and racing 人物／姿／数字s, and the furnishings were still the same red-plush, gold-gilt 議長，司会を務めるs, 磁器-globed chandeliers, and marble 破産した／（警察が）手入れするs of Shakespeare and Sir Beerbohm Tree. The waiters were like "family retainers." They had served 世代s of British men of 公式文書，認める, and while considering the ワイン 名簿（に載せる）／表（にあげる）, it was やめる the thing for them to advise: "Your father was always very 部分的な／不平等な to the Chateau Haut Brion, 1893, sir." The place was just the same as when Edward VII, then Prince of むちの跡s, had given supper parties to Lily Langtry in the 私的な room upstairs. This was the room in which we had our parties, and our young prince sat where his grandfather had sat, enjoying our gay chatter and the music, which （機の）カム from the same old phonograph with its cylindrical 記録，記録的な／記録するs which stood on a marble pedestal in the corner.
One of the first things I did when I reached London in the summer of 1944 was to walk through Maiden 小道／航路 to see if Roule's was still standing. It was, and my heart bounded with joy that the Germans had not 爆破d that little bit of my past into dust and ashes. Roule's was の近くにd and carefully shuttered. One hoped that its 井戸／弁護士席-在庫／株d cellar was carefully sandbagged, or that the precious 瓶／封じ込めるs had been sent away into a いっそう少なく 攻撃を受けやすい part of England until the war was over. But the building was 損なわれていない. It waited, as so many places in London seemed to wait, for England's 青年 and laughter to come 支援する again. 一方／合間, Roule's kept guard over the memories of the many gay suppers we had had there.
I was often 招待するd to the parties which the Prince of むちの跡s gave in his apartment in St. James's Palace, at which everyone sang and danced and did stunts. These parties were always informal and entertaining. You met people of all sorts and from every walk of life and profession at the Prince's parties, but never anyone who was dull or stuffy. He 招待するd international tennis 支持する／優勝者s, the newest blues singer, a guitarist who was all the 激怒（する） in Paris, 同様に as his own intimate 始める，決める. It was amusing that all this fun went on late at night inside the solemn old pile, with the 歩哨s keeping up their march along the pavement just outside.
Whenever Philip （機の）カム 一連の会議、交渉／完成する to the theater to take me to one of the Prince's parties and our モーター drove in at the gatehouse with the 王室の coat of 武器 over its portal, I always experienced a thrill. An unpretentious 入り口 led into the 部分 of the palace known as York House, which was 占領するd by the Prince just as it had been by his father when he was Duke of York. There was nothing elegant or stately about the Prince's 私的な rooms—they were those of any 井戸／弁護士席-off young bachelor who was 利益／興味d in sports and in music. The Prince's bedroom might have belonged to any British schoolboy or an officer living in 兵舎. There was just a 狭くする, 選び出す／独身 アイロンをかける bed with a （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する beside it on which there was always a glass of milk and an apple.
The Prince once took me on a 小旅行する of the 明言する／公表する apartments in the palace. We paused at the window from which, によれば the centuries-old tradition, every new 君主 is acclaimed on his 即位 to the 王位. Each of us was thinking silently that someday the King's 先触れ（する） would 布告する from the balcony outside that very window: "The King is dead. Long live the King—Edward VIII." But I am sure neither of us 嫌疑者，容疑者／疑うd then how soon that was to happen, nor the cataclysmic events which were to bring about the abdication of Edward VIII. At that time, during the 早期に twenties, no one in London had even heard of Mrs. Wallis Warfield Simpson.
In having his fling before settling 負かす／撃墜する to the serious 商売／仕事 which 直面するd him 最終的に, the Prince was giving England what the English people have always loved since the days of Prince Hal. As old George, the 行う／開催する／段階 doorman at the theater, 発言／述べるd with approbation: "Myself, I don't 'old with princes making parsons of theirselves. No, nor parsons and harchbishops setting theirselves up for lords." George was Labor and definitely anticlerical. He had a newspaper photograph of Ramsay MacDonald pasted on the 塀で囲む above the backless old 議長，司会を務める where he sat beside the 行う／開催する／段階 door. But his political 見解（をとる）s in no way 干渉するd with old George's truly British devotion to his King and the 王室の Family. His feeling for them, if いっそう少なく reverent than Granny's, was no いっそう少なく loyal.
"Wot I say is, 'e's 'uman. Even if Queen Victoria was his 広大な／多数の／重要な-grandma."
With the coming of the summer I rented a small riverside cottage 近づく Staines on the road to Windsor, and here I finally 説得するd Mother, Dad, and Granny to （問題を）取り上げる 住居 with Pamela and me. It was 近づく enough to London for me to get there every week end by train, and after a while Philip, who was 駅／配置するd at Windsor, used to 選ぶ me up and take me home by car on his way 支援する to 兵舎. の中で our gay companions at that time was Lord Latham, and several times he and Philip and the others would stop at Buck's Club, 選ぶ up a 妨害する of chicken, fruit, シャンペン酒, et cetera, and we would all roar 負かす／撃墜する to the cottage and get Mother out of bed to 行為／法令／行動する as hostess. We would spread our feast al fresco over the dining-room （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する under the lamp with the silk fringe that hung from the 天井.
One night we gave her a real surprise. We all arrived without 警告, as usual, and 大勝するd her out of bed. 負かす／撃墜する she （機の）カム, and we had supper. Suddenly she realized there was a stranger in our 中央 and that we were calling him "sir." Her gaze 発射 負かす／撃墜する the （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する, past his 直面する, and 直す／買収する，八百長をするd itself on my delighted grin; I nodded. I knew she had 認めるd the Prince of むちの跡s. She then switched her gaze to Philip, and he smiled 概して. She was a 勝利 in her 試みる／企てる to carry everything off without comment, and when the party was over, and as we stood at the gate 説 good night, the Prince stretched out his 手渡す to her. She curtsied and said, "Good night, Your Highness." I thought of those earlier days in Clapham: of how she always 急に上がるd above 負債 and constant orders to dispossess. I put my arm around her as we went upstairs to peek at Pamela, and as I slipped into bed I grinned at her and said, "What about my cousin Ruby now, darling?"
André Charlot was planning a new revue to be called A to Z, in which Beatrice Lillie was to 星／主役にする with Jack Buchanan, Teddy Gerrard, and the Trix Sisters. I went 負かす／撃墜する to the cottage to be with my baby and the family until something new should come along for me. Suddenly I got a 電報電信 from Charlot 説 that Beatrice Lillie was ill and that they had to open on a 確かな date. I went up to the theater, read the さまざまな sketches, heard the music, and 調印するd up. Once more Beatrice Lillie's misfortune was the 原因（となる） of my good fortune. From the 開始 night the revue was an enormous success. I sang "Limehouse Blues" for the first time; the orchestra was directed by Philip (Pa) Braham, who wrote the song with Douglas Furber. Jack Buchanan and I had wonderful 構成要素 together, and Teddy Gerrard was a sensation.
A to Z was followed by another revue, London Calling, in which I was starred. The show was written by Noel Coward, who had been cutting his teeth as a dramatist and actor. Noel floated 支援する into my life 正確に／まさに as if nothing had 介入するd between the days we were at 行方不明になる Conti's and the 現在の. Noel is like that. He can disappear 完全に for three years and then （犯罪の）一味 you up and continue the conversation you were having the last time you saw him.
The 優れた success of all Charlot's revues had brought him many 申し込む／申し出s from America. During the season of 1924 Archie Selwyn （機の）カム to London, saw the revue, and arranged with Charlot to bring us to Broadway that winter. For the American 版 Charlot made a conglomeration of popular numbers from all his revues. He 調印するd on Bea Lillie, who had been doing a play of her own. She and I were to be featured as co-星／主役にするs with Jack Buchanan and Herbert (Tommy) Mundin.
We sailed from Southampton on the last ship before Christmas, which meant that we traveled with a lot of. Americans hurrying to get home for the holiday, 同様に as a number of British people who were going to be entertained at New York and at Palm Beach. We had a riotous trip. The instigator of most of the fun was Max Aitken, later Lord Beaverbrook. Alastair McIntosh, who later married Constance Talmadge and who was the glamor boy of that year, was going home. 早期に in the trip Bea and Jack and I had confided to Allie our 苦悩 about where we were to stay in New York. It was the first time any of us had been there.
"Leave it to me, I'll 直す／買収する，八百長をする the whole thing," said Allie with a grand gesture. "I'll send a radiogram to my friend William Rhinelander Stewart. He 事実上 owns the 外交官／大使. He'll 直す／買収する，八百長をする you up."
"Wonderful," Bea and I chorused. We left it at that.
Our ship ドッキングする／減らす／ドックに入れるd on Christmas Eve. The long pier was a bedlam of porters, customs 公式の／役人s, reporters, and Americans welcoming home their friends and 親族s. Suddenly Bea and I began to feel very lonely and strange. But Will Stewart was waiting at the gangplank. Jack, Bea, and I were finally driven to the 外交官／大使 Hotel, where we were given two enormous 控訴s—one for Jack and one for Bea and myself.
"So this is America!" I exclaimed. "Look at that bath, will you? Feel that delicious warmth. Central heating, my girl. No wonder they call this the most luxurious country on earth."
Bea stretched herself on her bed and sighed ecstatically: "God bless Allie McIntosh."
Next morning New York from our windows was wonderful. In the （疑いを）晴らす, sparkling 空気／公表する the tall white buildings were tremendously exciting. The 見解（をとる） and the 空気／公表する made both of us ravenous. We ordered breakfast sent up. Presently there was a 非難する at the door. "Come in," Bea called. At that a 行列 of waiters, each 押し進めるing a little cart, 前進するd through the door in 軍の 形式. They wheeled the breakfast in to us, and such a breakfast—grapefruit, which we had never seen before, enthroned on shaved ice in silver bowls the size of washbasins; flagons of coffee and hot milk and cream; 抱擁する silver dishes under covers which the waiters 素早い行動d off with a 繁栄する to 明らかにする／漏らす enormous slices of ham, toasted muffins, and God knows what all. "Take no notice," said Bea. "It's all done with mirrors." It was like a musical-comedy sketch only, as we discovered when the 長，指導者 waiter ceremoniously 現在のd us with the 法案, the comic element was 欠如（する）ing. The 法案 was very real indeed, and for an 量 that staggered us.
We were both still very 煙霧のかかった about the value of American money. I wasn't too sure of the value of the dollar in relation to the English 続けざまに猛撃する. Bea lay 支援する on her bed, pretended to be 完全に bored by the whole 商売／仕事, and said loftily, "調印する the check, darling, and give all the waiters a nice fat tip. Don't forget, it's Christmas."
This was no joke to me. "Come on, Bea," I said, "we've got to work this out and see how much we each 借りがある, and how much we've got with which to 支払う／賃金 it." We got out our purses and 注ぐd the contents の上に the bed as soon as the waiters had gone.
Bea said, "It's perfectly simple. We each 借りがある three dollars and fifty cents."
So we started to try to work it out, not knowing one piece of American money from another, until we laughed so hard that we were exhausted. When our laughter finally 沈下するd, however, the 真面目さ of our position 夜明けd upon us, and I said, "Let's call Jack and see if he's had breakfast."
A faint 発言する／表明する answered the telephone. "Yes, I've had breakfast, have you?"
"How much was yours?" I asked, and Jack replied, "It looks like three hundred and fifty shillings."
I relayed this to Bea and she said, "Tell him to come up here at once." He arrived, and we explained that he 借りがあるd only three dollars and fifty cents, but that we were of the opinion that we were all in the wrong surroundings. After all, we were only in the rehearsal 行う／開催する／段階 for the show—we might not be a success when we did open, and we had to have some money to get around with until then. "We'll have to get out of here at once," said Jack. Bea and I agreed. "But we must be dignified about it. Think of Will and Allie. They recommended us. How can we get out?"
Jack did some quick telephoning, got 持つ／拘留する of Archie Selwyn, and explained our problem. We were recommended to Frank 事例／患者, who owns the Algonquin Hotel. Archie 追加するd: "And for God's sake, Jack, if you want to keep out of 刑務所，拘置所, don't let those dames 調印する any more blank checks."
As we were 運動ing across town to our new hotel I suddenly saw what I took to be an enormous wild animal ambling 負かす／撃墜する Fifth Avenue where we were stopped by a traffic light. I clutched Bea's arm.
"Look at that. What do you think it is?"
Bea peered out the window and began to laugh. She was born in Toronto and therefore not unaccustomed to the 驚くべき／特命の／臨時の sight of a six-foot man wearing a raccoon coat.
The light changed and the taxi 発射 across the Avenue and into Forty-fourth Street. Halfway along the 封鎖する I exclaimed:
"There's that raccoon man again! How did he get here so quickly?"
Bea laughed again and explained.
"Do you 現実に mean there could be two of them in New York at once?" I 需要・要求するd, awe-struck.
Within the next two days I was to learn that every undergraduate in town for the holidays was going about draped to the heels in shaggy 肌s, as though made up to play the lion in Androcles and the Lion.
At the Algonquin Bea and I were given a room such as we might have had in the Midlands at home. The minute we looked around at the rather dark-人物／姿／数字d wallpaper, the old-fashioned electric-light fixtures, the Brussels carpet, and the two 厚かましさ／高級将校連 beds with their crimson 負かす／撃墜する-filled comforters, we said to each other: "This is more like it."
Before our New York 開始, Bea and I were taken to see all the shows on Broadway. The boys 決起大会／結集させるd 一連の会議、交渉／完成する to show us the town—Eddie Goulding, Billy Reardon, Allie, and Will Stewart. We soon lost that stranger-in-our-中央 feeling that had come over us on the ドッキングする／減らす／ドックに入れる when our ship's companions flitted away and left Bea, Jack, and me sitting there with our luggage. We began to love New York.
Lillie and Lawrence,
Lawrence and Lillie,
If you 港／避難所't seen them,
You're perfectly silly.
One of the newspaper boys started singing that at a party one night to a tune of his own improvisation. This little ditty ran through our winter in New York with the persistence of a 高度に plugged 主題 song. But it was very complimentary, even if it wasn't good poetry, and it 表明するd some of the feeling—the gaiety, the nonsense, the lighthearted fun—which made Charlot's Revue unusual and memorable.
At least these were some of the things the New York critics said of the show when it opened at the Selwyn Theatre on New Year's Eve after a week's tryout in 大西洋 City. "People" (and that 含むd ourselves) who thought American audiences would never be amused by the English brand of humor were 軍隊d to think again when the Revue, which （機の）カム 初めは for a six weeks' 約束／交戦, was held on for nine months. The critics—Heywood Broun, George ジーンズ Nathan, Percy Hammond, 燃やすs Mantle, （犯罪の）一味 Lardner, with Alexander Woollcott in the lead—gave their 是認 without 資格. These nabobs of the 圧力（をかける） were pleased with the potpourri Charlot had put together for them. They called each of us 指名するs—nice 指名するs. Their judgment had such a powerful 影響（力） on the American public that the show すぐに became the 優れた 粉砕する 攻撃する，衝突する of the season on Broadway and a "must" on everybody's 名簿（に載せる）／表（にあげる）.
What seemed to impress the 大多数 of critics was that the Revue was 完全に unlike any entertainment of its type ever given in New York heretofore. It is not difficult to explain the difference between Charlot's Revue of 1924 and other musical shows, such as Ziegfeld's Follies and George White's スキャンダルs, with which New Yorkers were familiar. Charlot's revues were characterized by an exquisite economy, a camaraderie between all the players and the audience such as had not been known in America up to this time. It was not a rough-and-ready intimacy, and never a jocular 広告-libbing, but a mental closeness hard to define, and 即座の in its 控訴，上告. His revues did not depend upon みごたえのある lighting and scenic 影響s for success. Most of the sketches were played against drapes, which were beautiful in themselves but not breath-taking. There was no みごたえのある 電気の 陳列する，発揮する. And no tremendous chorus, such as Ziegfeld and Earl Carroll featured in their 生産／産物s. But every girl in the line had been selected to give an intimate individuality to the 生産／産物.
"I do not engage an artist and then find a place for her," Charlot used to say. "First, I have the place; then I find the artist to fit it. I never buy 指名するs. What I 支払う／賃金 for is personality, charm, talent." He certainly hadn't bought my 指名する—he made it for me.
In place of the magical big 指名するs, gorgeous 衣装s advertised as costing hundreds of thousands of dollars, 驚くべき／特命の／臨時の mechanical 影響s, and much-featured show girls, the Revue depended for its success upon four 主要な／長／主犯s 支援するd by a 井戸／弁護士席-選ぶd small company, which gave a 一連の sketches, songs, and dances.
There was nothing 国境ing on the salacious in any of the 行為／法令／行動するs. I think this 証明するs conclusively that Americans and British alike welcome and will always support theatrical entertainment which is neither coarse, indecent, nor ribald.
As one American reviewer 表明するd it: "You don't have to be 幅の広い-minded to enjoy Cbarlot's Revue."
One of the high 位置／汚点／見つけ出すs in the Revue was Bea Lillie's "March with Me" number, in which, dressed as Britannia, she led the line of girls, 持続するing a very dignified and stiff demeanor while getting all 絡まるd up with her feet and her 支え（る）s. Bea is one of those artists who are never any good at a rehearsal. She is a spontaneous comedienne. She needs the exhilaration of having an audience in 前線 of her. Everyone who has ever worked with her knows this and knows that, though she is shy at rehearsals, she can be 信用d to put her numbers over magnificently, and in her own inimitable way, when the moment comes.
But Archie Selwyn didn't know this when we were rehearsing for our New York 開始. When he saw the "March with Me" number he shook his 長，率いる over it. "When is she going to show me something?" he kept asking Charlot. And when Bea remained 静かな and unresponsive, Archie 宣言するd the "March with Me" number, which had been a tremendous 攻撃する，衝突する in London, would 落ちる flat on Broadway. He tried to get Charlot to 削減（する） it from the show.
But Charlot knew his 星／主役にする. He 辞退するd to be budged an インチ by Archie, and 単に smiled blandly at all the 暗い／優うつな prophecies; at even the two most direful words in theatrical parlance—"It stinks!"
And of course Charlot was 権利, as the 開始 night and every 業績／成果 thereafter 証明するd. Bea Lillie, as Britannia in "March with Me," was the 優れた 攻撃する，衝突する of the Revue.
I had a number of sketches with Jack and Bea and Herbert Mundin, and I sang "Limehouse Blues" with Fred Leslie and Robert Hobbs. I also had a 静かな little song called "I Don't Know" which caught on at once.
"Limehouse Blues" すぐに became popular. We heard it in every night club in New York. In England we never plugged songs as they do in the 部隊d 明言する／公表するs, and I was surprised and 極端に flattered to find everyone singing and playing "Limehouse" wherever I went. As a 事柄 of fact they still do, after all these years.
I had a lot of things to learn about America and the American way of doing things; 特に about the 親族 values of British and American 表現s. I learned about these by the 裁判，公判-and-error method.
Bea had been in America for a holiday when she married Robert Peel in 1922, but, like me, she knew nothing of the American theater or the reactions of American audiences. From the minute we landed until the night of our 開始 in New York I had gone around feeling as though someone had 発射 a 穴を開ける through my middle; then, when we knew the show was a success and made the wonderful, exciting 発見 that New Yorkers liked us, I felt suddenly like a colt in a pasture. My heels kicked up instinctively. I no longer walked, I pranced.
決定するd to find out all we could about America, we went to all the plays we could （人が）群がる in, and on Sundays to the pictures.
Bea and I took a duplex apartment together in a 変えるd house on West Fifty-fourth Street and this soon became a rendezvous for a gay （人が）群がる. Many of those who （機の）カム there were connected, in one way or another, with the theater. There were 作曲家s, writers of lyrics, 脚本家s, and newspapermen. They would 減少（する） in at all hours, and it seemed to make no difference to them at all whether Bea or I was there. If we weren't, they would すぐに make themselves comfortable and wait for one or the other of us to turn up.
We gave a lot of parties there. For one 推論する／理由, it was such an 平易な thing to do. Whenever we gave parties, our friends would send us flowers, いつかs superb food from swanky restaurants and clubs, and a more-than-適する 供給（する） of ワインs and spirits. William Rhinelander Stewart still hovered, and when spring （機の）カム he sent a florist with orders to 工場／植物 and 持続する the garden at the 後部 of our apartment. And with the warm, sunny 天候 our parties moved out there. Our 安定した salonites 含むd such grand people as Neysa McMein, Dorothy Parker, Jeanne Eagels, （頭が）ひょいと動く Sherwood, Richard Barthelmess, Laurette Taylor, Will Stewart, Eddie McIlwain, Allie McIntosh, George Ross, Charles Dillingham, Jimmie Walker, Aarons and Freedley, Ohman and Arden, Oscar Hammerstein, Howard Dietz, Arthur Schwartz, Jerome Kern, Irene 城, Fanny Brice, June Walker, Estelle Winwood, Lenore Ulric, Billy Reardon, Irving Caesar and Vincent Youmans, Zez Confrey, Kallmer and Ruby, Rogers and Hart, George and Ira Gershwin, Irving Berlin, Jules Glaenzer, Clifton Webb, Prince Dmitri, Schuyler Parsons, Jascha Heifetz, Alexander Woollcott, and Eddie Goulding.
Alexander Woollcott quickly became one of our best friends. He used to frown and shake his big 長，率いる and wiggle his fat forefinger in my 直面する, like a schoolmaster.
"Young 女性（の）, do you realize that you two girls have been 祝日，祝うd over here as no 訪問者s from overseas have been in the last twenty years?"
"I know!" I would look and feel very impressed. "But, Uncle Alexander, Americans are so enthusiastic. What's the Statue of Liberty for?"
Though I loved to tease Uncle Aleck and never could resist the 誘惑 to do so, I valued his 批評 and his 賞賛する whenever he saw fit to bestow either. He had—what is not at all rare in big, rather untidy men—unerring taste, and a sense of the delicacy of a 状況／情勢. It pleased me no end when he said to me one day: "With no more than a pout, a 新たな展開 of your shoulders, and two or three lines, you make me feel that I understand 正確に／まさに how the wheels go 一連の会議、交渉／完成する at the 支援する of a girl's mind."
That, I knew, was a real 尊敬の印 to Gertrude Lawrence the actress. 一方／合間, Gertrude Lawrence the woman savored the flattery of Percy Hammond's 発言／述べる in his column: "It has been said of 行方不明になる Lawrence that every man in New York is, or was, in love with her."
So, without setting out to do it, Bea Lillie and I 達成するd the fame of 存在 written up by the columnists, one of whom said, "の中で the famous places to be visited in New York is the apartment of Beatrice Lillie and Gertrude Lawrence. If you can get in."
As I look 支援する over those mad, （人が）群がるd months in New York, I cannot remember that Bea or I ever went to bed. Perhaps neither of us 手配中の，お尋ね者 to 行方不明になる any of the fun, the laughter, and the music. People were always around. Scarcely a day went by that we weren't looked up by someone just over from London, who had dropped around the first thing to see us. During that summer the Prince of むちの跡s （機の）カム over for a visit to America before going on to his ranch in Canada. In his party, or に引き続いて in its train, were a number of old friends of Bea's or 地雷, and they made our apartment their informal （警察，軍隊などの）本部 in New York.
The piano in our apartment went all the time. Vincent Youmans was trying out new compositions. It never seemed to make any difference to him, or George Gershwin, that the conversation and laughter went on around him all the time and that no one paid the slightest attention to what he was doing. One might have thought this a most unfavorable atmosphere for the composition of musical 得点する／非難する／２０s, but as a 事柄 of 記録，記録的な／記録する Vincent Youmans and Irving Caesar wrote most of the 得点する／非難する／２０ of No, No, Nanette in our living room, 含むing "Tea for Two."
My friendship with George Gershwin and his brother Ira, which began that winter, was to develop into a wonderfully successful 共同 when the brothers wrote the 得点する／非難する／２０ and the lyrics of Oh, Kay! for me a year later. Gershwin was an assiduous 労働者 and never spared himself. I remember going to hear his first 業績／成果 of the "Rhapsody in Blue" at Aeolian Hall, and we met at a cocktail party at 反対／詐欺dé Nast's afterward. George arrived late with every finger of both 手渡すs 包帯d from the 緊張する the "Rhapsody" had 需要・要求するd. He was a 広大な／多数の／重要な man.
Of all the friends Bea and I made that winter, Jules Glaenzer was the most fabulous. He was the New York 長，率いる of Cartier's and was famous for giving magical parties. He called us the Big Three—Lillie, Buchanan, and Lawrence.
Jules Glaenzer loved the theater and the theater folk loved him. Whenever I think of the parties at his house I always hear two or three pianos going at once. I think it can 安全に be said that more talent has been discovered in Jules Glaenzer's 製図／抽選 room than anywhere else in New York, 特に during the years of the middle twenties. Jules is one of those wonderful people, rare in any country and any society, who have 広大な／多数の／重要な 差別 and who—though not artists themselves—are creative in their ability to encourage and develop artists of every sort. When he discovers a musician or a ダンサー or a painter, he is as thrilled over his find as if he had turned up a new and priceless gem.
I 設立する American men 極端に likable and flatteringly appreciative. Perhaps you have to be born an Englishwoman to realize how much attention American men にわか雨 on women and how tremendously considerate all the nice ones の中で them are of a woman's wishes.
It had been a surprise for us in the cast of Charlot's Revue to discover that the season on Broadway usually の近くにd on June first, with a few shows running through the summer months. This, of course, was the exact 逆転する of things in London, where the season in the theater 同時に起こる／一致するd with the "season" at 法廷，裁判所 and in society, which 開始するs in May and continues until August bank holiday. So 非，不，無 of us had 推定する／予想するd to stay on in New York through the summer. It was more or いっそう少なく 一般に understood that the Revue would の近くに すぐに before 復活祭 and that we would sail for home to open in London when everyone would be in town. However, 商売／仕事 on Broadway was so good that Archie Selwyn arranged with Charlot not only to 持つ／拘留する the Revue over but to move to a larger theater, the Times Square, next door. At the end of September we would start on a twenty weeks' 小旅行する, playing four weeks in Boston, two weeks in Philadelphia, four weeks in Chicago, and the major stands west of the Mississippi.
Our last night on Broadway was a fitting 最高潮 to the whole amazing nine months. The two 前線 列／漕ぐ／騒動s of the orchestra seats were taken by the columnists, critics, and celebrities of the theater. In fact, hardly anyone who was in the house that night was seeing the Revue for the first time. The 大多数 of those in the audience knew our songs and sketches almost 同様に as we did, and their laughter and 賞賛 were not for the song or the sketch, but a personal and affectionate 尊敬の印 to the actors. Bea's banjo 発言する／表明する and her famous 索引 finger, which, as one reviewer put it, "was as elegant and uplifted as ever," were 元気づけるd as enthusiastically as if both were new to Broadway.
In one of Bea's numbers it was her custom to jump off the 行う／開催する／段階 in 逃げるing from an Apache lover, and 回復する it again only after 緊急発進するing across the auditorium between the 膝s of those seated in the 前線 列／漕ぐ／騒動 and the orchestra rail. At each 業績／成果 Bea would 減少（する） 突然に into some man's （競技場の）トラック一周. On の近くにing night the （競技場の）トラック一周 she selected was Alexander Woollcott's very commodious one. We thought we should never get 支援する の上に the 行う／開催する／段階 that night.
People were always telling us how surprised they were to find that the two women 星／主役にするs in the same show were good friends even to the point of living together. When we went into the Times Square Theatre, we 設立する ourselves in 隣接するing dressing rooms, both of them small and stuffy. We asked to have the door 除去するd between the two rooms. This 許すd us to use one to dress in and the other for our 訪問者s. It seemed to us a perfectly intelligent and not at all unusual way of arranging things, but we soon 設立する that people were amazed by it, 特に the 経営者／支配人 of the show which was scheduled to follow us at that theater.
"Listen," he said, "the two dames in our show 港／避難所't spoken since we opened. That door will have to be の近くにd up between them rooms or there'll be 殺人."
On our の近くにing night, after the finale, the whole house stood up and 元気づけるd us. They pelted us with flowers. When the orchestra struck up "Auld Lang Syne" the audience and company joined in the singing. Everyone took 持つ／拘留する of the 手渡す of the person next to him. The chain of friendly handclasps stretched across the 行う／開催する／段階, across the footlights, and continued through the house.
When the audience was finally 押し進めるd out of the theater several hundred of them 単に 延期，休会するd to the 行う／開催する／段階 door, where they formed such an 課すing 暴徒 scene that traffic was clogged in Forty-second Street.
When Bea and I （機の）カム out, laden with flowers, to get into our waiting taxi, we 設立する the roof of the 乗り物 packed with the more ardent revelers, who 護衛するd us through the streets of New York singing our own songs to us.
When we の近くにd in New York we went to play Boston. I very nearly said to play Harvard College, because the house was sold out night after night to Harvard boys, many of whom had already seen the show in New York several times over, and had come backstage and were friends of the cast. Johnny Green was one of them.
Johnny （機の）カム 一連の会議、交渉／完成する to my dressing room the night before we の近くにd in Boston to take me out to supper.
"I can't go," I told him. "I'm ill. I have a terrible 冷淡な."
It was true. I had been fending off a 冷淡な for several weeks, and as soon as we reached Boston the 気候 there had 打ち勝つ all my 成果／努力s. I was feverish and hoarse and shivering miserably. Johnny looked me over 批判的に.
"By 権利s, you should be home and in bed," he said.
"That's 正確に／まさに where I'm going," I told him. "I'd like to はう into bed and stay there for a week." The thought of having to play two shows the next day made me feel limp.
"Oh, I'll get you over it," Johnny 申し込む／申し出d. "Do you know the best way to cure a 冷淡な 即時に?"
"No. How?"
"Castor oil."
"I'd rather die, thank you."
"I'll show you a way so you'll never taste it." And when I looked at him doubtfully, he 追加するd, "All the fellows take it that way. It is one of the things you learn at Harvard."
I agreed to let Johnny dose me, and he took me home to the hotel and ordered up a terrifying 量 of castor oil and half a dozen 瓶／封じ込めるs of sarsaparilla. "What's the sarsaparilla for?" I 需要・要求するd suspiciously.
"You'll find out," said Johnny, and began, with a bartender's gestures, to shake up a fizz of oil and sarsaparilla.
"Now, 投げ上げる／ボディチェックする that off!"
I 負かす／撃墜するd the nauseating mixture and made a 直面する.
"You British are decidedly effete," said Johnny patronizingly. "Undoubtedly the best 血 of England （機の）カム over on the Mayflower. The ones the 巡礼者 Fathers left behind 簡単に didn't have the stamina."
"Oh! Didn't we!" Between the kidding and the castor oil my temper was rising. My 注目する，もくろむ lighted on the bulky 事例／患者 on 最高の，を越す of one of my trunks. In it was the saxophone Johnny was teaching me to play. I took the sax out of its 事例／患者 and blew a wailing 公式文書，認める.
"My God, it sounds like a French taxicab," he cried.
(I 設立する out in 1929 that those discordant 公式文書，認めるs on the saxophone were the inspiration for one of Johnny's greatest song 攻撃する，衝突するs, "団体／死体 and Soul." I took the song to England with me and later I gave it to Libby Holman.)
I glared at him and put all my 成果／努力s into what I hoped would be a rousing rendition of "God Save the King." I sounded most of the 公式文書，認めるs, but a few were squeaky and others 追跡するd off forlornly. The more Johnny grinned, the more 決定するd I was to play my 国家の 国家, so I kept at it.
"Ah yes," said Johnny reminiscently, "'America.' I know that number too." And to my accompaniment he began to sing unfamiliar words that had to do with the scenery of the 部隊d 明言する／公表するs. I tried to 溺死する out his singing with the sax. All at once I began to feel very peculiar.
"Let music swell the 微風,雷鳴d Johnny.
And （犯罪の）一味 from all the trees
甘い freedom's song..."
"S-Q-A-A-A-K," went the saxophone. It dropped between my 膝s and I 宙返り／暴落するd over it. Johnny gathered me up and carried me into the bathroom, where I proceeded to be 完全に and embarrassingly sick.
He had the effrontery to look pleased with the whole 訴訟／進行, and when he had helped me 支援する into my bed and covered me up with all the 一面に覆う／毛布s 利用できる the wretch congratulated me on my 罰金 業績／成果. "You'll wake up in the morning and never know you had a 冷淡な," he 保証するd me. "That's the way we do things at Harvard."
Maybe that 激烈な 治療 作品 wonders on the students at Harvard College. It failed with me. I was ill and 哀れな all next day, though I managed to drag myself through the two 業績／成果s. When the company left for Toronto, I felt like something the cat had dragged home, and whenever Charlot looked at me there was a little worried frown between his 注目する，もくろむs. My 発言する／表明する was hoarser than ever, and I was definitely lightheaded.
Toronto was Bea's home town and welcomed us with open 武器. The house was sold out 権利 through our stay there, and parties were scheduled for every night. I didn't want to seem a spoilsport, so I kept going though I alternately shivered and 燃やすd with fever.
On Thursday evening Bea Lillie said to me: "There's a man here I used to be engaged to as a kid. He's giving a party for us tonight at his house."
I said I thought I wouldn't go.
"Oh, darling, you mustn't 行方不明になる it," said Bea. "It's sure to be lots of fun. They are coming for us in a car. We needn't stay long."
"Very 井戸／弁護士席," I replied.
After the 業績／成果 we モーターd to our host's house outside the city where about twenty people were waiting for us in a big living room. My 長，率いる was throbbing, and I was 冷淡な all over. I got into a big 議長，司会を務める as の近くに to the 解雇する／砲火／射撃 as I could and basked in its warmth. I had taken several aspirins before I left the theater. I was aware that my chest 傷つける, but for some unexplainable 推論する／理由 these things no longer 事柄d. They were happening to someone who was no longer I. Presently we all went into the dining room to supper. Out of the もや that surrounded me appeared a short, slight 年輩の man who smiled and whispered:
"I've been to see your play tonight. My dear, you have the heart of a bullock, but you are riding for a 落ちる. Take care."
I tried to 投げ上げる／ボディチェックする off some light rejoinder. "Silly little old man," I thought. "He looks like 'Mr. Pim Passes By!'"
As though in 返答 to my thought, he floated away again into the もや and was 取って代わるd by other 人物／姿／数字s. There were so many I began to feel dizzy. "I don't feel 井戸／弁護士席," I said suddenly. "Please, won't someone take me home?" Someone 明らかに did, though I was past 存在 aware of who it was. All I knew was that presently I was in my bed—and drifting off to sleep.
Suddenly I woke. I switched on the light. Four o'clock. I looked around my room. Everything in it was familiar, but everything was about four times the size it should have been. I felt like Alice in Wonderland. I はうd out of bed and looked into Bea's room, which 隣接するd 地雷. Bea had not come in yet.
I 設立する the 温度計 that I carried in my dressing 事例／患者 and tried to find out if I had a 気温. The 人物／姿／数字s on the little glass stick read 104 degrees. "That can't be 権利," I thought. "No one can have a 気温 of 104 degrees." I crept 支援する into bed and の近くにd my throbbing 注目する，もくろむs.
I must have dozed again, for when I woke it was five o'clock. Again I took my 気温—104 degrees. "What a silly 温度計." I got up and went into Bea's room. She was in bed, sleeping 平和的に, but I woke her.
"Bea," I mumbled, and my 発言する／表明する （機の）カム from miles away, "do you know how to take a 気温?"
Bea yawned while I held the tube under my tongue for a minute; then she blinked at the 人物／姿／数字s. "One hundred and four!" she said in an awed トン.
"That's what it said before," I told her. "Bea, what happens when you have a 気温 of 104 degrees?"
"You die," said Bea. "Get 支援する into bed, darling. I'm going to call a doctor."
Meekly I obeyed. Everything became even more out of 割合. I felt I was living in a dream, and this seemed all the more 信頼できる when suddenly there appeared at my 病人の枕元 the same kindly old gentleman I had met that evening at the party. "Didn't I tell you so?" he 発言／述べるd, but not crossly. Then he proceeded to give orders to the nurses who appeared as if by 魔法, and I was rolled in 一面に覆う／毛布s and carried downstairs, stuffed into an 救急車, and モーターd away to Wellesley Hospital. I heard someone say, "二塁打 肺炎." Another 発言する／表明する said, "Pleurisy." Someone else said, "Dr. Ross is in 告発（する），告訴（する）／料金 of the 事例／患者."
I did not know when the Revue の近くにd in Toronto and the company went on to its next date, leaving me behind. I didn't know that there were stories in all the newspapers, telling that Gertrude Lawrence was 猛烈に ill. Or that a photograph of me in a hospital bed, and looking as though I already had one foot in the 墓／厳粛／彫る／重大な, appeared in a London paper where Mother saw it and nearly died of shock. I didn't know anything at all until one day I opened my 注目する，もくろむs and 設立する myself lying, literally embowered in flowers. Bewildering sprays of forsythia, dogwood, and lilac covered the 塀で囲むs. Baskets of roses and lilies were banked against these, and there was an enchanting, fully trimmed Christmas tree in the corner. The last words I remembered 審理，公聴会 Bea Lillie say flashed through my mind:
"When you have a 気温 of 104 degrees, you die."
"So I'm dead," I thought. "It's not bad at all. I feel like La Dame aux Camellias."
It was while I lay in Wellesley Hospital in Toronto that I first realized there was something wonderful in 存在 somebody. There in the hospital, with no member of my family or even an old friend 近づく me, I made the 発見 that, through caring about my work, people had come to care about me when I was ill, and this was 深く，強烈に 満足させるing. All the 電報電信s, cablegrams, and letters which 注ぐd into the hospital from people in the 部隊d 明言する／公表するs and at home, all the flowers and messages and other gifts from people who were 完全にする strangers to me and who knew me only as an actress who had entertained them, and even the stupendous floral offerings of Mr. Ziegfeld which arrived from New York packed in ice and at 正規の／正選手 intervals—all these were proof 肯定的な. They were a beautiful way of 説 "thank you" for the gift of laughter. They were the rewards for hours of rehearsal and hard work, and the schooling of André Charlot.
I had 明らかに been very ill—had had transfusions—and 行方不明になるd Christmas, hence the tree.
I was ill for fourteen weeks. Toward the end of that time Philip Astley （機の）カム over from England and stayed in Toronto so he could visit me. As soon as Dr. Ross said I could be moved, a nurse was engaged and Philip took us to New York and 権利 船内に ship. Dr. Ross had ordered me to take a long 残り／休憩（する） in the sun and 認可するd Philip's suggestion of taking me to stay with 相互の friends who had a 郊外住宅 on the Riviera.
As soon as I was able, we モーターd about the Riviera and over the 国境 into Italy and far into Sicily. We went sight-seeing in mellow old 寺s, and we lived where the garden 塀で囲むs were hung with wistaria and まっただ中に lemon and orange and olive blossoms—the most romantic 行う／開催する／段階 減少（する） I ever played against. How lucky I was to have seen all that beauty before its 破壊 by this war.
Charlot cabled us that the company was scheduled to sail from New York. Philip モーターd me from Italy up to Cherbourg to 会合，会う the ship, and there I 再結合させるd Bea, Jack, Tommy, Charlot, and the company, and went on with them to England to be ready to open at the Prince of むちの跡s Theatre in the "勝利を得た return from America of Charlot's Revue."
From Catterick our E.N.S.A. caravan took the road to the north with Glasgow as our ultimate 目的地, but when we arrived in Newcastle the first night, we 設立する orders to 運動 支援する forty miles along the way we had come to put on a concert at Barnard 城 for the 戦車／タンク 軍団. We were all pretty ratty by then, as we had had no 残り／休憩（する）, no food, and we were 直面するd with the forty-mile ride 支援する to Newcastle after the show. Eighty miles to give one half-hour show. It was lucky all of us were 退役軍人 troupers, experienced in playing one-night stands. There is no room for a prima donna and no field for the prima-donna temperament on a （軍の）野営地，陣営 小旅行する.
When I first joined up with the others I was aware that they watched me 辛うじて. They wondered if I could take it. That made me smile. Hadn't I been a trouper myself for years? I knew all the 不快s of 存在 on the road—at least I thought I did. I was to find that playing the （軍の）野営地，陣営s in 戦時 is やめる different from playing theaters—even small ones—during peace.
But those furtive, 用心深い ちらりと見ることs reminded me of the time I made a film at 最高位の's Long Island studio. I had just finished starring in Candle-Light. I hadn't been working at the studio for more than a few days before I realized everyone was waiting for me to 爆発する and be temperamental. When I did not, I got the feeling I had failed to live up to 期待s; failed to behave as a 星／主役にする was popularly supposed to behave.
Our 部隊 was one of the lucky ones, with no personality to sound a sour 公式文書，認める. After weeks of 小旅行するing together, we had settled 負かす／撃墜する into a good working company. Each of us could 高く評価する／（相場などが）上がる, through experience, the 質s of all the others.
Big, blonde Zoë Monte, who sang sentimental ballads in a high, astonishingly true soprano, and her husband, Basil Melford, were our 二塁打 行為／法令／行動する. Zoë and Basil had been married for twenty-five years and were 充てるd to each other. She looked after him and mothered him, which he pretended to 反逆者／反逆する against, but 明白に couldn't have done without.
Clarence Myerscough's orchestra was one of our attractions. Clarence is a Lancashireman, but from 熟考する／考慮するing and appearing for years abroad he has lost his Lancashire burr and now owns an accent which has become so perfect I thought he could have come only from Vienna. The Viennese 公式文書，認める ふさわしい Clarence amazingly. In fact, it ふさわしい him so perfectly that I think even he, 同様に as everyone else, had forgotten it was not real. Later on we were to be very 感謝する for his knowledge of French—特に the patois.
A third 行為／法令／行動する was 供給（する）d by Wilfred Hubbard and his "fifty-two assistants"—a pack of cards. Wilfred's tricks were a never-ending amazement to us in the 部隊 同様に as to the audiences.
Our accompanist, May, was Irish—innocent, vague, and a darling. Stanley Kilburn was our ピアニスト, and a very brilliant one. Stanley had ulcers of the stomach which Mary Barrett, who shepherded all of us, undertook to cure. I think Mary's 長，指導者 関心 during our 小旅行する was to keep me happy and at the 最高の，を越す of my form and to return Stanley to London （警察，軍隊などの）本部 minus his ulcers. Mary's real boss was Gracie Fields, about whom she had a ceaseless 基金 of stories. Fortunately, she and all the other members of the 部隊 were endowed with that priceless 成分 for making an adventure go over—a sense of humor. We were often able to laugh about things that happened to us en 大勝する, which, in different company, would have been annoying and infuriating.
I was thinking of this during the short stay we made in Edinburgh. I hadn't been in the hotel five minutes when a dour-looking man, whom I noticed standing in the ロビー, （機の）カム over to our group and 演説（する）／住所d himself to me. "Do ye ken are there any E.N.S.A. shows in Edinburgh the noo?"
I said I didn't know of any. "Why?"
He drew 負かす／撃墜する his overlong upper lip with 広大な／多数の／重要な 真面目さ. His 発言する／表明する dropped confidentially. "Did you no' hear aboot the trouble over at Ballycraig?"
"No," I replied.
"The 少しの bairns threw 石／投石するs at the actors."
"Why did they do that?" I asked.
"Happen they didna like them." He smacked his lips. "We Scots are vurra particular."
"So I've heard," I said pacifically. "As a 事柄 of fact, our E.N.S.A. troupe has played to a good many Scottish 兵士s. And I've played in Edinburgh myself. Nothing like that has happened to me."
"Nay," he said. "But ye can neverrr tell when it might, lassie. So take this 少しの 小冊子." He 手渡すd me a tract with the alarming 肩書を与える: TAKE HEED, FOR THE END DRAWETH NIGH. And with that walked away.
Though we weren't 石／投石するd anywhere by the particular Scots, we had 遭遇（する）d a 十分な number of difficulties before we landed in Edinburgh. For instance, when we arrived at Dundonald, outside Glasgow, to put on our show, we 設立する that the coach with all the 衣装s and the musicians' dress 控訴s and 器具s was 行方不明の. We 延期するd the show for an hour. When that passed and still no coach had arrived, Stanley, the ピアニスト, Clarence—who always carried his violin in his （競技場の）トラック一周 while traveling—and I started a sort of impromptu show of our own and kept things going until the 衣装s did arrive and the others were ready. Around 10:00 P.M. our real show opened. We rang 負かす／撃墜する at eleven forty-five, dog-tired, but knowing we hadn't failed the boys, and happy in their 賞賛. We were 招待するd to go to the mess for a drink, which we did and were glad of—no food though. Then we モーターd 支援する the thirty-five miles to Glasgow, only to find that the hotel had fed our suppers to some hungry sailors and had bedded 負かす／撃墜する a number of the jack-tars in our bedrooms. By 二塁打ing up, however, we managed to get some sleep.
When we 始める，決める out from London for the north, it was with the 限定された 約束 that, having played the （軍の）野営地，陣営s en 大勝する, our 部隊 would then be sent on to the Orkneys. As everyone knew, though the 検閲 jealously guarded news from that terrifically important 海軍の base, the (n)艦隊／(a)素早い put in and out of Scapa Flow. Since that 検閲 still 持つ／拘留するs, I am constrained to tell only 簡潔に the story of our 小旅行する of this 前進するd 地位，任命する.
We left our motorized 器具／備品 in Edinburgh to 飛行機で行く over the Highlands and the 狭くする but tempestuous Pentland Firth which divides the Orkneys from John o' Groats. The Firth is only six to eight miles across, but it has a bad 評判 for its dangerous 現在のs, and I was more than glad that we were to 飛行機で行く over it. The flight north from Edinburgh was wonderful, though we ran through 補欠／交替の／交替する 暴風雨s, 日光, and もやs. This, of course, was the country to which, in happier days, Philip and his friends went 定期的に every twelfth of August for the grouse 狙撃. Nothing short of a broken 支援する could have 原因（となる）d Philip not to keep his 年次の August 約束／交戦 with the Scotch grouse.
We were driven to our billets in Kirkwall, which is the largest town in the islands, just a mile or two from Scapa. The place had been built as a hotel for anglers and vacationists; then （機の）カム the war, and the 海軍 took it over for billets. I had my first bath in three days, then dropped into bed and slept like a child.
The place was like a 兵舎, and 十分な of WRENS, WAAFS, 兵士s, sailors, 海洋s, and their wives and children. At 6:00 A.M. the sergeant in 告発（する），告訴（する）／料金 tramped 負かす／撃墜する the 回廊（地帯） and banged on the door of every room with an アイロンをかける ladle, of all things, until the occupant replied, その為に giving 証拠 he or she was awake. I was up and out 早期に, relishing the きびきびした salt 微風.
We were 招待するd to lunch with 海軍大将 Sir Henry Moore 船内に the 旗艦 H.M.S. Duke of York. Afterward his 開始する，打ち上げる took us to our 永久の billets on the island of Flotta. Here E.N.S.A. had its own hut, just like an army Nissen hut, except it was made of 支持を得ようと努めるd. The eighteen members of our 部隊 （人が）群がるd the hut almost to bursting. The girls 株d three rooms, and the boys had one large one at the end of the hut, with me in a 選び出す／独身 in the middle. The nights were 冷淡な, with high 勝利，勝つd. We used to collect driftwood to 燃やす in the coke stove while we got ready for bed. All our 旅行s had to be made by "drifter." It was fun going out, but the return trips were uncomfortable, long, and 冷淡な.
It was amazing on this 孤立するd, 荒涼とした, treeless 暗礁, with its entanglements of barbed wire, to find a 罰金 theater—good 行う／開催する／段階, dressing rooms, and excellent acoustics. And of course the most appreciative audiences in the world. The men were either 駅／配置するd here for the duration and 調印（する）d in or they had come in from the sea, 退役軍人s of many 堅い 戦う／戦いs.
We 押すd off about 1:00 P.M. in a drifter for the garden 位置／汚点／見つけ出す of the Orkneys, which is a little island called South Ronaldsay. Its port has the lovely 指名する of St. Margaret's Hope. We went 船内に to a stiff 微風, a good swell, and a strong smell of frying fish. Mary Barrett すぐに nosed out the galley and saw to it that a half kipper was passed out to all of us. As we had an hour's trip ahead of us to St. Margaret's Hope, the smell of the 乗組員's mess and the 見本 we had of it were maddening. How do men live for days and days at sea without food and water? Then, as if in answer to my hunger pangs, a 長，率いる popped up the galley steps from below and a 発言する／表明する said: "Yer tea's ready."
We girls—Zoë, Joan, May, Mary, and I—went below and had the most wonderful meal with the 船長／主将 and his three mates. 広大な／多数の／重要な 襲う，襲って強奪するs of ship's tea, 抱擁する slices of bread thickly spread with butter and jam, and a dish of kippers cooked in butter! After we had eaten our fill, the men of our 部隊 were 招待するd 負かす／撃墜する to be fed.
The drifter's 乗組員 did this for us 任意に, and the only way we could show our 評価 was to see that they were all 招待するd to the show we put on that night. One of our most, appreciative 観察者／傍聴者s was the Bishop of Edinburgh, who was visiting the 旗艦 and sat in the 前線 列／漕ぐ／騒動 and laughed louder than any of the sailors, although I think he had his gentle 疑問s about the 長所s of "I Wanna Get Married."
This life is certainly one of ups and 負かす／撃墜するs—one day tea and kippers with the drifter's 乗組員, the next, dinner at Malsetta House with Sir Robert and Lady Harwood, which is the 政府 House of the Orkneys. The first intimation I had of 存在 introduced into this atmosphere of gold braid and good 産む／飼育するing was the message that Sir Robert and Lady Harwood would like to 会合，会う me, and please would I call at Malsetta House on my way to the show. I thought this a bit 半端物, as I had known Sir Robert when he was on the Exeter and before he was knighted for 沈むing the Graf Spee. However, the Malsetta House car met us at the pier at Hoy and drove Mary and me ten miles to be 迎える／歓迎するd by a house party of twelve people. Lady Harwood said: "Hello, my dear. Would you like to go straight to your room or will I just send your 捕らえる、獲得する up?"
I said that I was going to dress at the theater, at which Sir Robert 削減（する） in: "But you're dining and staying the night with us, as your shows are on this 味方する tomorrow."
I stood dumfounded in my ざん壕 coat and khaki uniform. Mary coughed. We were an hour's boat 旅行 away from （警察，軍隊などの）本部 and our 捕らえる、獲得するs.
"I have a lovely 解雇する／砲火／射撃 in your bedroom. We shall be so disappointed if you don't stay."
The thought of a bedroom with a 解雇する／砲火／射撃 in it, even just to look at, was bliss, so I 受託するd the 招待 to dinner. However, Mary and I used the Malsetta bathroom, sat by the 解雇する／砲火／射撃 in the bedroom, and then went downstairs.
We went in to dinner—all very grand, with menservants to wait on us, and we had delicious fresh-caught salmon. It was getting late, and I began to look questioningly at Mary. We had to 運動 ten miles to the show and I had to （不足などを）補う. My mind was wandering, and in my abstraction I 辞退するd the port. The steward filled my wineglass with water; then I realized too late we were about to toast the King!
I stood with the 指揮官 of the (n)艦隊／(a)素早い and drank the toast to His Majesty in water, and felt like some 哀れな 人物／姿／数字 in a Bateman 製図／抽選!
For 上向き of ten days we did the Orkneys, putting on shows 船内に ships like H.M.S. Dundas 城, which was a ghost ship of the good old days of 楽しみ 巡航するs. The Dundas 城 used to sail to Africa with tourists and passé actors making 別れの（言葉，会） 小旅行するs. She was about to be broken up for 捨てる in 1938 when the 海軍 took her over and remodeled her into the maid-of-all-work to the (n)艦隊／(a)素早い.
Her engineers 修理 the ships that put in for 修理s. Her dentist, Dr. 賭事, fills all the aching cavities that come his way. Officers を待つing leave, or returning from leave, are ４半期/4分の1d 船内に her until they can 再結合させる their own ships. She 扱うs all the mail for the (n)艦隊／(a)素早い in Scapa Flow. Her theater, 負かす／撃墜する in her bowels, far below sea level, has to be seen to be believed. You go 負かす／撃墜する a million stairs and suddenly come upon an auditorium with red plush tip-up seats, a real 行う／開催する／段階, and good dressing rooms. All these were part of the cinema which was the attraction of B deck when the 城 was a 楽しみ-巡航する ship.
On our last day at work in the Orkneys we left by drifter for the island of Shapinsay to do our last show for the 海軍. There were only about three hundred men and two officers in the （軍の）野営地，陣営, and most of them had been there without leave for a long time. Shapinsay is much too small and too remote—though terribly important in the chain of 弁護s—to be on the 名簿（に載せる）／表（にあげる） for E.N.S.A. shows to visit. Ours was the first 星／主役にする 部隊 to go there. All the 村人s and their children were 認める to the show.
When we left Shapinsay around five-thirty in the afternoon, we cajoled the 船長／主将 into giving us a long-way-一連の会議、交渉／完成する trip home to our billets in Kirkwall. 非，不，無 of us looked 今後 with any 切望 to another night on a NAAFI cot, such as we had been sleeping on in the 宿泊所s. The 勝つ／広く一帯に広がるing knobbiness of the thin mattresses made one feel one was curled up on a 解雇（する） of coals.
We had been 招待するd to spend our last evening in the sergeants' mess at Kirkwall, and we all looked 今後 to a rousing good time. On the way there I was asked to 減少（する） in to see the new Arts Club, which had been opened in the town. When we drove 一連の会議、交渉／完成する, there was a group of people waiting by the door. A 海軍の officer detached himself from the group to 迎える／歓迎する us and 護衛する us inside, where I 設立する myself suddenly standing beside a grand piano and heard the officer 発表する: "And now it gives me 広大な／多数の／重要な 楽しみ to 現在の 行方不明になる Gertrude Lawrence, the celebrated 行う／開催する／段階 and film 星／主役にする."
To my horror, I saw a room ばく然と filled with 年輩の women, young girls, and a few shy 海軍の officers. One very mannish-looking 女性（の） had a 審理，公聴会 装置 placed on the （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する before her, connected by a long cord to her ear which, 推定では, wired her for sound.
I stood there in the 中央 of this truly Noel Coward setting and said: "Thank you so much," and was about to sit 負かす／撃墜する when the 海軍 man whispered, "What shall I 発表する you are going to sing?"
I was 罠にかける. I had not 嫌疑者，容疑者／疑うd the 推論する／理由 of our visit to the Arts Club, and my ピアニスト had no music with him. However, he went to the piano and played a few chords and I sang "I Wanna Get Married." This drew repressed giggles from the girls and frozen silence from the older listeners. The 女性（の） who reminded me of a Helen Hokinson 製図／抽選, however, seemed delirious with joy. This led me to wonder if she was the only human 存在 in the club or if her ear gadget had not been tuned in and she was 単に trying to be polite, not having heard a naughty word.
After the song I sat 負かす／撃墜する, feeling that I was を待つing 宣告，判決. Then Stanley was 招待するd to play. He was very angry, but his humor rose above his wrath, so he played with a 広大な／多数の／重要な 取引，協定 of bravado and many sour 公式文書，認めるs.
After the tepid 賞賛, someone said: "Let's have some choruses." Stanley 強いるd again, and our audience sang them in a 精製するd, having-a-hell-of-a-time, let's-all-be-devils sort of way.
After this we left, but not until the three 海軍の officers had come up and わびるd because the club had no 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業. We said it was やめる all 権利 and that the club was charming and that we didn't drink anyway, so we left.
井戸／弁護士席, the sergeants' mess, when we arrived there, liberally made up for this 欠陥／不足. We had an impromptu show which ended in a supper of large plates of fresh 貝類と甲殻類 and beer.
When the barkeep showed 調印するs of 疲れた／うんざりしたing, I 申し込む／申し出d to take his place.
"This is a ticklish sort of 職業," he said, trying to put me off.
"Let me show you how 井戸／弁護士席 I can do it," I begged him.
He agreed to this, and let me draw a couple of 襲う，襲って強奪するs.
"I must sye, you do very 井戸／弁護士席 for a hamachoor."
"Amateur nothing, Sergeant! I was a barmaid myself once. Earned my keep at it, too, for several weeks. And built up custom too."
The barkeep gave me a look which could be 解釈する／通訳するd as "The hell you were!" But he said with an 成果／努力 toward politeness, "Maybe in a play, in the theayter."
"Not in a theater; at the Red Lion Hotel in Shrewsbury."
To him I was a 星／主役にする, and, like most simple folk, he probably thought I always had been.
It was やめる true, that bit about my having been a barmaid. It （機の）カム about in this way: One of the 小旅行するing companies I was playing in, before I had my chance in André Charlot's Revue, played Shrewsbury. Three of us girls put up at the Red Lion, which gave special 率s to theatricals. Shrewsbury is a busy 郡 town, and the Shropshire 農業者s who drove in on market day had a way of dropping into the Lion for a glass of Shrewsbury ale. They were not amiss to getting a glimpse of a pretty 直面する, a 集まり of curves, and a winning smile along with their drinks.
Our company 経営者／支配人 at the time was a little man with a strawberry nose and very 厚い レンズs. We all called him "Old Four 注目する，もくろむs."
Anything could happen in such tacky little shows in those days, but we were not 用意が出来ている for what was in 蓄える／店 for us this time. Saturday （機の）カム and we played the matinee and waited for the 経営者／支配人 to appear with the salaries. But "Old Four 注目する，もくろむs" had flown the 閉じ込める／刑務所 with the takings.
We three girls returned gloomily to the Red Lion and discussed what was to be done. As usual, we had very little money between us. I had not enough to 支払う／賃金 my week's 宿泊するing at the inn. As I thought of my wardrobe, which consisted 主として of 支え（る）s, I put far from me the idea that I could pawn any of it for 十分な money to take me 支援する to London to 追跡（する） a new 職業.
The other girls were more solvent than I. They were able to 支払う／賃金 what they 借りがあるd at the Lion. One of them had enough money to take her to London. The other, Myrtle, had a sister married to a stationer in Birmingham and 近づく enough to be a 避難 during this 緊急.
"Not that I shall be welcome," Myrtle said. "Her old man never did cotton to me. It was one of those marriages. Percy's family are 高度に respectable, I'd have you know, and what they think of theatricals isn't fit for any girl's ears."
"How are you going to explain to them when you arrive?" I 手配中の，お尋ね者 to know.
Myrtle gave me a wink over her plump, 明らかにする shoulder. "信用 Sis and me. We'll think of something to tell Percy. Later I'll get to London somehow."
As far as I could see, I would have to remain in Shrewsbury—alone and on my own. At least until something turned up for me somewhere. The Theatre 王室の in Shrewsbury was a place on the 正規の／正選手 大勝する of many of the companies which played the 州s and, not infrequently, as I knew, a company on 小旅行する counted on 選ぶing up someone to fill a minor part in each town they played. This 協定 was usually cheaper than carrying a 正規の／正選手 performer for the part, and it brought 商売／仕事, because all the girl's family and friends would come to see her. Perhaps some such 一打／打撃 of luck would come my way if I waited long enough. But, in the 一方／合間, there were my expenses at the inn. I was puzzling over a way of 会合 these when Myrtle turned around from her mirror.
"I don't like leaving you here, kiddo," she said.
"Oh, I'll be all 権利," I 急いでd to 保証する her. "I have a 計画（する）."
And I had. The idea had come to me as an inspiration. I 辞退するd to tell Myrtle, but my repeated 保証／確信 that I was not altogether without 資源s 元気づけるd her tremendously.
I went downstairs next morning and asked to see the proprietor of the Red Lion. I was under no necessity to explain to him what had happened to our company, for he knew. To him I 控訴，上告d with 武装解除するing candor. I was stony, and I was not 否定するing it. I 借りがあるd his inn in the 近隣 of twenty-seven shillings; but, I 急いでd to 保証する him, I would welcome the chance to 支払う／賃金 the indebtedness by working.
"What can you do?"
"I could work in the 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業."
His 注目する，もくろむ went over my 長，率いる in the direction of the tap-room where his 正規の／正選手 barmaid, a large, blowzy girl, 指名するd—ironically—Tina, was lazily polishing glasses. From Tina the landlord's 注目する，もくろむ （機の）カム 支援する to 残り／休憩（する） on me.
"I could do with another girl in the 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業," he said thoughtfully. "The only difficulty is..."
"I know," I said quickly. "Tina."
He nodded. "Tina's a good girl. She's been with me three years. She's a cousin of my wife's. Knows all the 安定した 顧客s and what each one of them likes. Can give 'em 支援する as good as they give her too."
"Suppose you leave Tina to me," I 示唆するd. "She'll understand I'm not here to take her 職業 away from her—only to help her through the busy season."
That bit about the busy season was carefully 工場／植物d. It was August, and the 年次の Shrewsbury Floral and Musical 祝日，祝う was scheduled for Wednesday and Thursday of the に引き続いて week.
In the end, the landlord took me on. He led me up to Tina and 発表するd with bluff good humor that, in 見解（をとる） of the warm 天候 and the 増加するd 顧客s which the 祝日，祝う was sure to bring, he had engaged me as her assistant. I ran upstairs and broke the news to the girls. They （機の）カム 負かす／撃墜する and drank a glass of port on the house. Then they left for their trains. I was now a barmaid.
At first Tina was inclined to be 怪しげな of me and my 意向s. It was a decided novelty for a chorus girl to turn barmaid, and Tina could not believe that I was doing this without ulterior 動機s. I made a clean breast to her of my 状況／情勢, and because she was kindhearted she laid aside her 初めの 疑惑s. Generously she lent me a dozen kid curlers and showed me how to put up my hair on them so I should have the mop of curls which used to be considered part of a barmaid's make-up.
When I entertained her with tales of my experiences and anecdotes of other actors and actresses—some of whom she had seen—she became my friend. She even 認可するd of my way of polishing the glasses and 向こうずねing the pewter beer taps. After two days she let me do all of it. In return, she taught me how to draw a 十分な, yet not 洪水ing, glass of beer. This, as the barkeep at the sergeants' mess at Kirkwall was to tell me many years later, is something no amateur can do. Thanks to Tina—and the busy season in Shrewsbury—I am a professional at it.
I was a success as a barmaid, if I do say it. The 正規の／正選手 顧客s—the 商業の 旅行者s, 農業者s, and tradesmen from the shops—seemed to welcome the novelty of a new barmaid who sang as she drew them a 減少（する） of what they fancied. 商売／仕事 at the Red Lion was きびきびした. What with my 給料 and tips I paid off my 負債 to the landlord and managed to 始める，決める aside something to stand me in good stead when my 適切な時期 （機の）カム. It （機の）カム, 最終的に, with a company which opened at the Shrewsbury Theatre in a 劇の play called The Rosary. The 管理／経営 手配中の，お尋ね者 a 地元の girl and, thanks to my success in the 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業 at the Lion, the 経営者／支配人 had not been in town an hour before he was told by someone to stop 一連の会議、交渉／完成する at our place, have a glass of dark and bitter, and look me over. I was engaged to dress as a 修道女 and sing the song "My Rosary" as a prologue to the play to give it "atmosphere"!
My return to the profession was celebrated in the tap-room of the Lion, and the 経営者／支配人 was congratulated on his choice. Though the 年次の 祝日，祝う was over, our 顧客s did not 落ちる off, for the simple 推論する／理由 that a number of 国民s and やめる a few of the masters and boys from Shrewsbury's celebrated public school （機の）カム there on the chance of 存在 served by the girl they had just seen in the play at the theater. This might have turned the tide of my fortunes in such a direction that I would have remained behind 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業s all my life, but fortunately for me the publicity worked 同様に in the opposite direction. People （機の）カム to the theater ーするために see the 修道女 who was barmaid at the Red Lion.
When the company left Shrewsbury for its next stand, I paid my 法案 at the Red Lion and returned to London, the Cats' Home, and the casting offices. It is a 事柄 of pride to me that the landlord 発言／述べるd on our parting, "Gertie, you can have a 職業 here in my 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業 any time."
I think everyone felt a little sad when it （機の）カム time to 飛行機で行く away from the Orkneys.
We arrived at Donnibristle in time for tea—three 計画（する）s 十分な—含むing trunks, 派手に宣伝するs, 二塁打 basses, and Zoë May was 脅すd during the flight, which we made in wonderful 天候, but everyone （機の）カム through without 事故 until just before 上陸, when Harry, the saxophone player, was suddenly sick from sheer 救済 that the flight was over.
We put on a show for the (n)艦隊／(a)素早い 空気／公表する Arm at seven-thirty, then caught the ten-thirty フェリー（で運ぶ） across the 前へ／外へ and slept that night at Hawes's Inn, under the 影をつくる／尾行する of the famous 橋（渡しをする） and the eagle 注目する，もくろむs of the M.P.s. As a 支配する, no one was 許すd to break a 旅行 at this point, either going in or out of Edinburgh, as one 試みる／企てる was made by the Germans to destroy the 橋（渡しをする）, and the area was under 激しい guard. Since we were traveling under 軍の orders, an exception was made for us.
Our next stop was in a small Cumberland village, and was occasioned by no いっそう少なく a 需要・要求する than our hunger for the fish and 半導体素子s we smelled frying in a little shop. Four of us sat on the running board of the トラックで運ぶ and ate that greatest of all English delicacies out of newspaper. It was the first time I had had that 扱う／治療する of my childhood in many years and I 設立する my appetite for it 衰えていない.
Mary told us a true story of a five-months-old baby who was brought into one of the London day nurseries. The family had not had a 減少（する） of milk for many weeks. Asked how they had managed to 料金d the baby, the mother replied: "We gave her a little bit of whatever we had."
What they had was principally fish and 半導体素子s, washed 負かす／撃墜する by strong tea. The fact that the baby had 生き残るd this diet would seem to 証明する that forty-eight million Britishers can't be wrong.
Our first 職業 in Manchester, at nine-thirty next morning, was to rehearse for a monster broadcast from Belle Vue, the amusement park. I worked all day, broke long enough to have my picture taken riding Lil, the elephant, and another in a hair-raising roundabout known as the Caterpillar. The last time I did that stunt was in 1937 with Douglas, now 中尉／大尉／警部補 指揮官, Fairbanks.
The （人が）群がる at the broadcast was enormous—eight thousand servicemen 現在の, and very thrilling.
Basil Dean （機の）カム 負かす／撃墜する from London for the show, 解任するing to me the fact that the first time I ever played in Manchester was under his direction. He introduced me with words that gave me a shock: "行方不明になる Gertrude Lawrence, who is now on her way to Normandy."
Basil had just returned from Bayeux, where he had been making 計画（する）s to send the first E.N.S.A. 部隊s into フラン.
This was my first 公式の／役人 notice that I was to be 許すd to go across to the 侵略 前線, for which we had seen so many men 始める，決める out. It was what I had hoped for, begged for, worked for—the 適切な時期 to entertain the fighting men at the actual 前線.
At that moment I was glad of every springless, lumpy （軍の）野営地，陣営 bed I had stretched my 疲れた／うんざりした bones upon. It had all been our basic training.
We 調印するd our papers before we left Manchester and received our orders to proceed to London for inoculations as soon as our 小旅行する ended—in いっそう少なく than a week.
During the next six days we literally raced across England, doing shows for the 海軍 and the 空気／公表する 軍隊 and the WAAFS. At St. Nathan's （軍の）野営地，陣営, 近づく Cardiff, twenty-four hundred airmen and WAAFS packed themselves into a theater only big enough to 持つ／拘留する fourteen hundred. The audience was, literally, two 深い. St. Nathan's, I was told, was the largest 空気／公表する-training （軍の）野営地，陣営 in the world, with a 職員／兵員 of forty thousand. Our 部隊 would have had to stay there a week and give two shows a day to entertain that audience.
We ran on south into the 侵略 area and all the bustle and 騒動 again. The sky above us was 十分な of 計画（する）s, 耐えるing other glider 計画（する）s with 空気／公表する-borne 軍隊／機動隊s, 牽引するd by the famous nylon-在庫／株ing line. The roads were jammed with トラックで運ぶs and 戦車／タンクs and 兵士s of all the services—literally millions of men and mountains of 弾薬／武器—all 長，率いるd one way-to フラン.
So we （機の）カム at last to Salisbury in the 影をつくる／尾行する of the famous cathedral, which was still 損なわれていない and strangely serene in the 戦争の atmosphere that filled the old town. We did a show for the Army at Lark Hill （軍の）野営地，陣営. Our last two shows in this area, under canvas at Bustard （軍の）野営地，陣営 and for the R.A.F. at Keevil, gave me a taste of what I was told I could 推定する／予想する across the Channel. Our 行う／開催する／段階 was improvised out of kitchen （米）棚上げする／（英）提議するs, and the lighting was done with あわてて rigged kerosene lamps. Afterward, in the mess where we were given supper, the ネズミs （機の）カム out and 注目する，もくろむd us hungrily as we gobbled our Spam and salad before they could get it away from us. At Keevil, though the theater was very much better and the mess had a 井戸／弁護士席-在庫／株d 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業, the mess （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する 群れているd with earwigs. In フラン, I was told, we would have dust and mosquitoes as 井戸／弁護士席 as all the forms of vermin known to man.
In Salisbury, Richard was able to join me for a few hours' leave. After all, he was then based only forty minutes away. We had so much to talk over, so many things to tell each other, as we strolled about the cathedral の近くに. It was my last chance to see him before going to Normandy.
From the window of one of the ATS billets sounded a concertina, evidently 存在 played by someone new to the art. "I'm dreaming of a white Christmas," wheezed the concertina. And four or five American G.I.s who were walking about, 見解（をとる）ing the cathedral, grinned and started to whistle the song to help the concertina player. An 年輩の clergyman in a violet cassock, passing along a path to choir practice, looked first 苦しめるd at this 侵略 of the sanctity of the cloisters, then smiled benignly.
A lot of things were changing. Much of the England I had known and loved and had belonged to was gone. I had thought so many times, in the course of those five thousand miles which had taken me from Portsmouth to John o' Groats and 支援する again. There was a house which once had been 地雷, a blackened 集まり of がれき with the wild grasses already （人命などを）奪う，主張するing it for a 廃虚. There were the towns I had known and played in when they were 栄えるing and 損なわれていない, now maimed and disfigured. There were friends one asked about only to be told 静かに, "Killed."
But all the changes were not sorrowful ones like these. Some, like the look on the priest's 直面する when he smiled at the G.I.s, 約束d 井戸／弁護士席 for the 未来.
I said a little of this to Richard, and he agreed with me. Then we went on to talk of some of the many things which meant so much to both of us. Like so many husbands and wives in these 戦時s, we had so little time. There was no knowing when or where—or even if—we would 会合，会う again.
After Richard left to return to 義務 and I packed up for the trip 支援する to London to get ready for my trip to Normandy, my mind was 十分な of the changes I could feel 同様に as see taking place on every 味方する. I remembered how, as a child, I had thought of the world as very stable. Even boringly so. All the adventures, so I thought, had been had by others long ago. The grown-up people I 観察するd seemed to live in a 削減（する）-and-乾燥した，日照りのd world. They were already settled in life. In my heart of hearts I dreaded the time when this would happen to me. Yet people used to talk about "settling 負かす／撃墜する" as though this were something every nice girl should wish to do.
井戸／弁護士席, perhaps I'm not a nice girl. One 推論する／理由 why I have always loved the theater and why I'm still 行う／開催する／段階 struck is that this sort of life 申し込む／申し出s variety, constant change, even dangerous and thrilling "ups" and "負かす／撃墜するs."
At heart I have always been an adventurer. The Danish 緊張する in my 血 makes me restless. I am a 探検者, not a 支えるもの／所有者. I am filled with 緊急の curiosity about what may 嘘（をつく） just around the corner.
During my illness in the hospital in Toronto and then throughout my 長引かせるd convalescence, when it was bliss just to be alive with Philip in the 日光, いつかs, even in the 中央 of my happiness, a 冷気／寒がらせるing thought would strike me. Suppose this is the 最高潮. The ultimate high moment. This is perfection. What more can life give me?
And even in the 日光 I would shiver わずかに.
Philip was not given to introspection. He believed in taking life and people as he 設立する them. And he 設立する them good and fair to see. I never felt that he understood me 特に. Maybe I was too young to be very 納得させるing. He had 確かな ideas about me which, put together, composed a personality, and he was in love with that. We never talked about our feelings. If I ever felt moved to tell him how I felt about life, the impulse withered すぐに when I thought how Philip, with his social background, would receive such 発覚s. I knew it would have embarrassed him.
We were having lunch in the dark and dreary dining room of one of Cherbourg's small hotels while waiting for word that the Aquitania was coming into port. Our holiday was over. I was both sad and glad—sad because Philip and I had had such a happy time together. It could never be やめる the same again. And I was glad, too, as Philip said, "Because you are going 支援する to your 職業, Dormouse. I believe the theater means more to you than I do."
"Really?"
I said it, mimicking his accent, to make him smile. And he did. But inwardly I was wondering—as I did at times—if Philip was 権利 about this. Perhaps he did know me better than I then knew myself.
The 人気 of Charlot's Revue in America 増加するd the excitement and the warmth of our 歓迎会 when we 再開するd in London in the 早期に spring of 1925. There was so 広大な／多数の／重要な a 需要・要求する for seats for the première that Charlot 可決する・採択するd the unique and daring 計画（する） of giving two 業績／成果s—one at 8:00 P.M., the other at midnight.
Never was such an audience 組み立てる／集結するd in the theater as at that second 業績／成果. Celebrities of society and 行う／開催する／段階 （人が）群がるd the building from 立ち往生させる and dress circle to the boxes, and even the gallery and 炭坑，オーケストラ席.
It was the same show in general that we had played in New York, and many of the numbers had been seen many times in London, but it seemed as though everybody 手配中の，お尋ね者 to see the familiar 行為／法令／行動するs all over again.
Perhaps there was some curiosity as to whether playing to American audiences for so long a run had changed Bea Lillie's or my style. Bea was very much in the news because her husband, Bobby Peel, whom she had married in 1922, had just 後継するd to the baronetcy. As Lady Peel, Bea was an even greater 攻撃する，衝突する than ever 簡単に because she remained the same unspoiled Bea Lillie.
The Guv'nor, as we used to call Charlot, was always 警告 us that no artist can afford to 残り／休憩（する） on his laurels until he is dead. He kept reminding us that he had not brought the company 支援する to London 単に to ride along 無期限に／不明確に on the successes it had piled up in New York. He was 決定するd to make the return of his revue the high 位置／汚点／見つけ出す of the season.
Bea and I 注入するd into the Revue our 共同の impressions of the typical "sister 行為／法令／行動する" which we had seen in America. This 含むd a burlesque by Bea of Fanny Brice, and I did an imitation of Sophie Tucker, who was then enormously popular in London. For this 行為／法令／行動する, Bea and I dressed alike, we played ukuleles, and of course we did の近くに harmony. We were known as the Sisters Apple—Seedy and Cora.
One June night that season the after-theater （人が）群がるs passing along Regent Street noticed a large car stop in 前線 of a "His Master's 発言する／表明する" gramophone shop. The driver 現れるd from the car. After entering the shop, he returned with a porter in a green felt apron. The two men approached the car and the passers-by stopped and 星／主役にするd in horrified amazement to see the porter reach into the 支援する seat of the car and, after a かなりの struggle, bring out the 団体／死体 of a woman whose quaint crooked smile advertised her as 行方不明になる Beatrice Lillie of Charlot's Revue! As her gold-覆う？ feet hung limp at one end and her 武器 were outstretched at the other, she did not seem in any 条件 to resist her captor. Her smile remained unperturbed and 甘い as it 直面するd the public over his brawny shoulder. He gently but hurriedly carried her into the shop. The （人が）群がる 増加するd as word ran up and 負かす／撃墜する the street that some queer happenings were going on. Once more the porter 現れるd. Again he dived into the car and （機の）カム out with still another woman thrown carelessly across his shoulder. Someone said, "My God, it looks like Gertrude Lawrence!" The woman's 脚s kicked and her 手渡すs （警官の）巡回区域，受持ち区域 a helpless tattoo on his 支援する, but the porter's powerful 武器 were 倍のd tight across her 残余. So finally he carried the two 人物／姿／数字s in and they stood 味方する by 味方する in all their gold-sequined glory as an 宣伝 for gramophone 記録，記録的な／記録するs.
"Blimey," someone in the （人が）群がる said. "They're 模造のs!"
"Not a bit of it. It's them."
The （人が）群がる argued and 増加するd. Charlot had learned the 力／強力にする of advertising methods in the U.S.A.
Charlot's Revue ran for many months and then の近くにd. Several months later Charlot had an 申し込む／申し出 to 準備する another revue for New York, so he gathered his 初めの company around him—Jack, Bea, and me.
Again we 始める，決める sail for America—on the Caronia. Bea was …を伴ってd by her husband, Bobby Peel, who was すぐに surrounded by the 圧力（をかける） and was hard put to explain: first, that he was not a member of the company; second, that he was not connected with the London police 軍隊—the "Peelers," as they are 愛称d for Bobby's grandfather, who 組織するd them; third, that he was no relation to "Do Ye Ken John Peel?"
When we opened in New York, Noel Coward was playing there in The Vortex. Our first night was very heartwarming—all the （人が）群がる turned up and Uncle Aleck Woollcott wrote in his column the next day, "It was not a 業績／成果—it was a 再会."
We had a good show. Bea sang "There's Life in the Old Girl Yet." Gertrude Ederle had just swum the Channel, and Bea did a burlesque of that muscular lady which was hilarious. We did our "Fallen Babies" song dressed as one-year-olds, in 抱擁する baby carriages—ending up with getting tipsy from the gin in the feeding 瓶／封じ込めるs belonging to our absent nursemaids. I sang "Carrie Was a Careful Girl" and "Parisienne Pierrot," both written by Noel. Jack, as always, was excellent, but for some 推論する／理由 the gilt was 行方不明の from the gingerbread. We ran only six months in New York and after a short 小旅行する we arrived in Hollywood. For three weeks the town was ours.
On the の近くにing night we 徐々に noticed that all the Hollywood male 星／主役にするs in the orchestra seats were leaving before the finale. This worried us terribly; we couldn't understand such 行為! 井戸／弁護士席, Jack went on in his 十分な Highland 衣装 and sang the 開始 of the last song; I followed dressed as Flora MacDonald; and then （機の）カム Bea as Bonnie Prince Charlie. By this time there wasn't a 選び出す／独身 Hollywood male 星／主役にする left out 前線. We all sang bravely and laughed gaily, trying to carry off our 狼狽, when suddenly one by one の上に the 行う／開催する／段階 （機の）カム the 行方不明の males.
They all had their trousers rolled up to their 膝s; Valentino had on a Scotch headdress borrowed from the chorus girls; Charlie Chaplin had his dinner coat tied 一連の会議、交渉／完成する his waist like a kilt; Richard Barthelmess had a tam o' shanter on; the Marx Brothers wore red 耐えるd; Jack Gilbert carried a ladder, for what 推論する／理由 no one knew. They took over the whole finale with us; they made speeches; and Chaplin, who at that time was 辞退するing to make "talkies," made his speech in dumb show. Oh, what a night!
Bea stayed on in Hollywood for a while; she had 調印するd on to appear in New York in September in a musical farce which Jerome Kern wrote for her. I, too, had made my 決定／判定勝ち（する） to leave Charlot's 管理／経営 and 受託する a New York 契約. That was to be Oh, Kay! produced by Alex Aarons and Vinton Freedley. George Gershwin was 令状ing the music 特に for me; and his brother, Ira, the lyrics. The 調書をとる／予約する was by P. G. Wodehouse and Guy Bolton. Rehearsals were to begin in New York 早期に in October, so I had time for only a 簡潔な／要約する holiday in England.
I 原因（となる）d some びっくり仰天 when the 圧力（をかける） photographers caught me going 船内に the Mauretania on a blistering August day with 明らかにする 脚s. I had 実験d going stockingless in California and 設立する it comfortable and economical.
As soon as it was 報告（する）／憶測d that Gertrude Lawrence was going about barelegged, the papers began to interview fashion 専門家s and other actresses to get their opinion of the fad I had started. Marilyn Miller, when interviewed, 表明するd ladylike 不賛成 of the 革新, and 発表するd that she had brought 支援する from Paris two hundred pairs of silk stockings which she had every 意向 of wearing. 行方不明になる Carmel Snow, fashion editor of Vogue, was 引用するd as exclaiming with horror: "The idea is disgusting. It will never be done by nice people."
Pam （機の）カム 支援する with me when I returned to New York from England. My little daughter was a surprise to the American 圧力（をかける）, as I had never 許すd her to be publicized or photographed for the illustrated papers. I 手配中の，お尋ね者 to keep Pam's life simple and 避難所d, with no サーチライトs turned on her. I 手配中の，お尋ね者 her to grow up a normal, wholesome little girl and without 接触する with the theater. If she 手配中の，お尋ね者 to go on the 行う／開催する／段階 later on, and showed an aptitude for it, that would be time enough to introduce her to the world in which I spent so much of my life.
Oh, Kay! opened in November and was a tremendous success. Gershwin's 得点する／非難する／２０ was Gershwin at his sprightliest. The piece had lots of humor and that indefinable something which can only be 述べるd as spirit. Oscar Shaw played the lead, and 勝利者 Moore 供給するd most of the uproarious comedy.
It was that winter, my third in New York and during the run of Oh, Kay! that I met Bert Taylor, and すぐに my life changed. This tall, dark-haired, 素晴らしい-looking American was like someone one only reads about. With a snap of his fingers, a ちらりと見ること, a 静かな word, he had the 力／強力にする to bring about 奇蹟s. Bert had been born with a gold spoon in his mouth. His father was 大統領，／社長 of the New York 在庫／株 交流, and Bert had rolled up an enormous fortune of his own during those years when 塀で囲む Street was 持つ／拘留するing carnival.
Bert Taylor figuratively knocked me off my feet. From the moment of his 入ること／参加（者） into my life I began to live in a storybook world. While New York streets were glazed with ice and the sky sent 負かす／撃墜する にわか雨s of sleet, my apartment was abloom with spring and the fragrance of American beauties.
A 銀行業者 in Bert Taylor's position could, and not infrequently did, make a 利益（をあげる） of fifty thousand dollars in a day's 貿易（する）ing on the 在庫／株 交流; and, exhilarated by this 業績／成就, on his way uptown to his club he would 減少（する） in at Cartier's and spend a part of the day's 捕らえる、獲得する on a gorgeous bauble to please the lady of his heart.
Is it any wonder that Bert Taylor, who moved habitually in this fantastically luxurious world, should have swept me off my feet? Philip and I were extraordinarily companionable. His devotion and attention to me had brought me 広大な／多数の／重要な happiness. But from the start of our friendship both of us had known, and had 認める 率直に, that we had no 未来 together. Circumstances to which we both had to 服従させる／提出する kept us apart. For several years I was content with half a loaf, but, as 必然的に happens, the 失望 最終的に bred a restlessness. That, I really believe, was one 推論する／理由 why I 手配中の，お尋ね者 to stay on in America; and why I did stay on. It was no longer happiness enough just to be with Philip knowing that we could never marry and have a life together. I carried 支援する with me to America a loneliness. Undoubtedly this made me even more susceptible than I would さもなければ have been to Bert's 広大な／多数の／重要な charm and to the attention he paid me.
I wrote Philip that I was seeing a lot of this young American. Philip and I had always been honest with each other. We were really and truly friends. Sooner or later he would have heard about Bert Taylor and me anyway. There were Americans 絶えず going over to London and to the Riviera and to St. Moritz for the winter sports, and many of Philip's friends （機の）カム to New York. Bert's sister, the Countess de Frasso, was a 井戸／弁護士席-known 人物／姿／数字 in the international 始める，決める whose members floated from Santa Barbara to CÃ&激烈な／緊急の;te d'Azur, from New York to the Lido, and from Salzburg to Palm Beach.
When it was evident that Oh, Kay! was 運命にあるd to stay on Broadway for many months, Philip cabled me that he was coming over to New York for a visit. And he did. In New York that winter for the first time he asked me to marry him. If he had only done so two years before I am sure I would have said "yes," and would have すぐに gone about the 商売／仕事 of getting a 離婚 from Frank.
Oh, I did not 非難する him. His career was as important as 地雷, and it would have been 難破させるd had he married a 離婚d woman. Though I was his wife, he could not have brought me to 法廷，裁判所, since etiquette forbade this. He could not have entered the 王室の enclosure at Ascot—something which may seem petty to Americans but which is 極端に important to English people of Philip's position, not 単に for what it is, but for what it 代表するs.
If I had been only an actress, we might have 打ち勝つ some of the 対立, 特に if I had abandoned my career and retired to Philip's house in the country. But I was not 用意が出来ている to do this—not now. I belonged to the theater. My life, since I was ten, had been lived in it. The public had been 肉親，親類d to me and I 借りがあるd them 忠義 in return. Philip's income was not 十分な to 支払う／賃金 the 激しい expenses of his clubs, his uniforms, and all the 義務s connected with his career in 法廷，裁判所 circles and to support me and a growing daughter.
No, from whatever angle you considered it, marriage with Philip Astley was impossible.
So I said, "No, darling," when Philip asked me to marry him. Philip took the next boat 支援する to England, and I went on with my 職業.
I sent for Mother. She arrived after "a beastly crossing, the worst in forty years. Even the captain was sick."
I had a beautiful apartment on Park Avenue with everything to give Mother a taste of American 慰安 and 高級な. But she 辞退するd to 認可する of any of it. She complained that Pam had become too American.
From the beginning the idea was a mistake. Mother liked the apartment but it was too high up—it 脅すd her. She liked Bert, but she kept talking about Philip; she hated the 冷淡な 天候, but she couldn't stand the steam heat. She liked her new 着せる／賦与するs, but she couldn't understand Americans, and she never went out because the traffic all went the wrong way!
However, after a while she got more settled. Then she 行方不明になるd and worried about Dad. So when the good 天候 （機の）カム, she went 支援する to England. We hadn't discussed anything!
Once 支援する home, people wrote me that she never stopped comparing the living 条件s of London with New York; and the moment anything went wrong she would say, "Of course over in America everything is so different, and the central heating is marvelous!"
That summer I played Oh, Kay! in London and continued the fantastic 存在 I had entered upon in New York. Several Indian princes from Hyderabad with their 側近s were at the Savoy and （機の）カム to see our play. They adored it. The Gershwin 得点する／非難する／２０ and the English company were excellent. The princes proceeded to show their enthusiasm by taking a box for the season. Occasionally the box would be 占領するd by several ladies in Indian dress, with their caste 示すs on their foreheads, precious 石／投石するs on the 味方するs of their nostrils, and beautiful long saris draped over their 長，率いるs, swinging gracefully from their bejeweled shoulder pins.
The youngest prince took a fancy to me. We called him "Baby" because his own 指名するs were so many and so difficult to remember. Baby was enraptured by every sort of mechanical gadget and 現在のd me with a cigarette はしけ 形態／調整d like an airplane, and a miniature 大砲 which 解雇する／砲火／射撃d a lighted cigar. He bought dozens of such things to take home with him to adorn the palace at Hyderabad, where he 招待するd me to visit him. He 現在のd me with a very large photograph of himself on a very small polo pony. Before going 支援する to India the princes gave a 祝宴 at the Savoy. It was all very sumptuous, and at every lady's place was a small gold kidskin 捕らえる、獲得する.
I 選ぶd up 地雷. My fingers told me that inside were several small, 一連の会議、交渉／完成する hard 反対するs. "Ah!" I thought. "This is it! Nothing いっそう少なく than emeralds. Or pigeon-血 rubies." I 発射 Baby a 尋問 ちらりと見ること. He was beaming, 確信して of the 広大な／多数の／重要な 楽しみ he was giving me.
"It is something you ladies like very much," he said. "I hope you like—"
I pulled the drawstring. Out into my expectant palm 宙返り／暴落するd a handful of the betel nuts Indian women chew to blacken their teeth and gums.
I then and there decided not to visit Hyderabad.
George Gershwin was in London for the 開始 of Oh, Kay! and was lionized by English society. He gave concerts, he raised money for charities, he visited every famous "stately home of England," yet he remained the same serious, hard-working young man. He bought 控訴s in Savile 列／漕ぐ／騒動 and took me along to the fittings and to select his shirts and 関係 at Hawes and Curtis's, and hats at Scott's. But he never lost his 長，率いる size.
His one 利益／興味 in life was his music. Before he returned to New York he visited フラン and wrote his famous "American in Paris" concerto.
I had 賃貸し（する）d a flat in Portland Place from the Marquis de Casa Maury and ーするつもりであるd to make it my 永久の home. Pam entered school at Roedean in Sussex. The flat was beautiful and I loved it. Sybil Colfax redecorated it for me. I had one of the first rooms in London to be done in mirrors, and a white 製図／抽選 room with silver sequin curtains. I had 徐々に collected some 罰金 old Bristol glass and some pictures, 含むing a Gauguin. Also many photographs and bibelots. の中で these was a charcoal 製図／抽選 of an animal which was ーするつもりであるd to be a pig, though it looked わずかに like a rhino, and from another angle like a badger. It might have passed for one of Thurber's 創造s, but it was the work of the Prince of むちの跡s, who drew it blindfolded, as a stunt at a charity bazaar, and 現在のd it to me.
I didn't buy a Bentley car. I had one built. I took the Bentley to America with me when I returned late in the summer, on the same boat with George and Ira Gershwin, to start rehearsals for their new musical, Treasure Girl. I also took the very smallest baby Austin I could buy. I remember 運動ing the Austin up Fifth Avenue one day and 存在 stopped by a red light. The 警官，（賞などを）獲得する left his 地位，任命する in the 中心 of traffic to come over and lean his 肘s on the radiator.
"Say, lady," he 発言／述べるd confidentially, "what do you do with it at night? Keep it under the bed?"
Clifton Webb and Walter Catlett played in Treasure Girl with me, but the show was not the success Oh, Kay! had been. I had one song which went over big, "Where's the Boy?"
All that winter and through the summer after Treasure Girl の近くにd and I stayed on in New York to make a picture at 最高位の's Long Island studios, I continued to see a 広大な／多数の／重要な 取引，協定 of Bert Taylor. Before coming to America, I had 適用するd for my 離婚, and the 法廷，裁判所 had 認めるd it, though under the British 法律 the 法令 did not become 絶対の until six months had passed. Bert and I were engaged. He had come to London to see me while I was playing in Oh, Kay!, had 提案するd, and I had 受託するd him.
I was 深く，強烈に happy; everything seemed to be coming my way. I was riding on the crest of the wave.
Gilbert Miller had 調印するd me to co-星／主役にする in Candle-Light with Leslie Howard and Reginald Owen. We were to open at the Empire Theatre in New York in the autumn of 1929. The play was a Viennese comedy by Siegfried Geyer, and had been adapted by P. G. Wodehouse, who had done so much toward the success of Oh, Kay! Candle-Light had been produced in London with Yvonne Arnaud in the 主要な 役割. It was one of the first of many plays—悲劇の and comic—written around the romantic 人物／姿／数字 of the Austrian Archduke Rudolf. Everyone 予報するd it would be a 抱擁する success on Broadway.
Candle-Light 示すd my first 外見 in America in a 合法的 play, and I was both excited and terrified. On the first night I had a cable from Noel, who was, as usual, going around the world on a tramp steamer.
LEGITIMATE AT LAST, DARLING. WON'T MOTHER BE PLEASED?
My pride knew no bounds when Gilbert Miller hung my portrait in the Empire Theatre with those of Doris Keane, Helen Hayes, and Ina Claire.
No one 明らかに, not even Bert, had any inkling that the autumn of 1929 was to be the end of an 時代.
I began to get the idea that money flowed in without 制限s or with very little 成果／努力 on my part. When I remembered how hard I had worked to earn fifteen shillings a week just ten years 支援する, it seemed incredible that I should be 収入 thirty-five hundred dollars a week in the theater. Not to について言及する my paper 利益（をあげる）s in the market. Of course I had no idea of it at the time, but I was to be one of the 犠牲者s of the にわか景気 years. It was to be a long, hard time before I was to acquire a 現実主義の 態度 toward money.
いつかs, when I had 賭事d 首尾よく in the, Street, I would remember poor Dad and his pathetic, ever-希望に満ちた 成果／努力s to 支援する a 勝利者. He was still playing the horses. Mother shook her 長，率いる over it, but whenever I was in England Dad and I would get together. He would confide to me his choice for the next Derby or the Manchester 障害（者）, and 証明する to me that his horse was sure to 勝利，勝つ. We were partners. He still considered Mother the most remarkable woman in the world. He would tell me so and would impress the same on Pamela:
"Your grandmother's a 罰金 woman. And don't you go forgetting it, my girl!"
We opened in Candle-Light on the last night of September. Leslie Howard was excellent as Joseph. I shall never forget his way of replying to my question to the supposed archduke: "Do you, Prince Rudolf, have many mistresses?"
"Ah, Baroness, they do pile up."
In the supper scene Leslie and I were supposed to drink rather 自由に of the ワイン 注ぐd for us by the real archduke in the livery of a servant. によれば theatrical custom this was really weak, 冷淡な tea and 極端に 汚い. It isn't 平易な to appear to enjoy drinking the 肉親，親類d of concoction the 所有物／資産／財産 man 供給（する）s for a rare vintage. One night I saw to it that the contents of the decanter were emptied and the 瓶／封じ込める refilled with some excellent 乾燥した，日照りの sherry.
After his first drink, Leslie threw me a look of delighted surprise. His 事実上の／代理 took on 追加するd richness and flavor. And he 投げ上げる／ボディチェックするd off his ワイン instead of toying with his glass as he usually did.
As for myself, I felt that I was giving the best 業績／成果 I had ever given. I began to enjoy the supper scene. The archduke had to fill and refill our glasses. There was more realism than 事実上の／代理 in the の近くに of the scene in which Leslie and I became わずかに spiffy.
必然的に Candle-Light felt the 衝撃 of the 衝突，墜落 that 粉々にするd the 泡 of 繁栄 which Americans—and New Yorkers 特に—had been playing with. But the play continued to run with more than fair success. Perhaps people 手配中の，お尋ね者 amusement that 申し込む／申し出d them an escape from their 財政上の worries. They still did not want to 直面する the grim reality.
Bert was up to his ears in worries and 責任／義務s. In the circumstances it seemed impractical for us to marry. At least Bert said it was. I was 解放する／自由な to marry him and I 手配中の，お尋ね者 to, just to 証明する that I loved him and not his money.
But he said, "No, Peaches. I must fight this thing alone. I can't afford to marry now."
He had called me "Peaches" since soon after we met, which was at a time when the romance of a middle-老年の gentleman 指名するd Daddy Browning and an outsize young girl called Peaches 人物／姿／数字d in the news. Bert was amused by the contrast my わずかな／ほっそりした 人物／姿／数字 現在のd to the plump Peaches', and he enjoyed my fury whenever he called me the absurd 指名する.
But now I did not retort, "Don't call me that." I 抗議するd I was willing to go on working to help things along financially. That only 傷つける his pride more 深く，強烈に. We were at a 行き詰まる.
When Candle-Light の近くにd I went into Lew Leslie's International Revue, which had lyrics and music by Dorothy Fields and Jimmy McHugh. The cast 含むd Harry Richman, Jack Pearl, and Anton Dolin, and, as the 肩書を与える 暗示するs, many 大陸の and foreign performers. They all dropped out, however, after a few weeks, and only Jack, Pat Dolin, Harry, and I remained. You can imagine the sort of life those three madmen led me backstage.
I had two excellent numbers in the revue, "正確に／まさに Like You," and "On the Sunny 味方する of the Street," that I sang with Harry Richman. But though a lot of money had been spent on the show it did only fair 商売／仕事. We の近くにd in May. André Charlot had 申し込む／申し出d me a 契約 to 星／主役にする in a new revue he was 行う／開催する／段階ing. The 申し込む／申し出 tempted me; I was fond of the Guv'nor and 借りがあるd him a 広大な／多数の／重要な 取引，協定 of my success.
It was always 奮起させるing to work under the direction of this man of whom Sir James Barrie once said: "There goes the whole theatrical profession in a nutshell."
I 調印するd the 契約 Charlot 申し込む／申し出d me. My 計画（する）s for the next season seemed 始める，決める. Then two men who had 人物／姿／数字d prominently in childhood years in the theater （機の）カム 支援する into my life.
The two men were Charles B. Cochran and Noel Coward. They had a play which Noel had written. It was called 私的な Lives.
Noel had written it in Burma or Peiping or somewhere in the course of his travels in the Far East. But there was nothing oriental about 私的な Lives. It was modern, British, and suavely sophisticated.
When Noel's 経営者／支配人, Jack Wilson, brought me the script to read I fell in love with it. I was 決定するd that I—and only I—should play Amanda, whose "heart was jagged with sophistication." Noel was to play the male lead, of course.
Noel wrote 私的な Lives 特に for me. It was his fulfillment of a 約束 he had made to me and to himself when Bitter 甘い was produced and I was unable to play it because of my 契約 for Candle-Light. The part was given to Peggy 支持を得ようと努めるd instead of to me, and Noel had said:
"Never mind, darling. I'll 令状 another play, 特に for us, that will be even better."
Now he had done it. But again I was under 契約 and did not know whether I could get out of my 協定 with Charlot.
I dashed off a cable to Noel to tell him how thrilled I was about the new play. I am usually 無謀な about cables and send terribly long, expensive ones. But for once I was having an economical streak, so I worded the message 簡潔に:
PLAY DELIGHTFUL STOP NOTHING WRONG THAT CAN'T BE FIXED
What I meant was that the only hindrance was my 契約 with André Charlot and that I was trying to get 解放する／自由な of it, which I finally 後継するd in doing. But Noel took it to mean that his pet play needed 改正s. He was furious. The sputter of his wrath lighted up the 太平洋の as he 旅行d, and he scorched the cable wires with scathing comments on my ability as critic and 脚本家.
We were 権利 支援する at 行方不明になる Conti's squabbling over who should ride the bicycle and who should play the phonograph.
He was still indignant when he caught up with me at Captain Molyneux's 郊外住宅 at Cap d'Ail 近づく Monte Carlo, which I and my friend Helen 負かす／撃墜するs had rented for the summer. Noel never has 完全に forgiven me for that cable, and I don't think he has ever really believed even to this day that I was not making an 逆の comment on his play.
We went over the play and rehearsed our scenes at the 郊外住宅. Every evening we arranged and 配列し直すd the furniture in the 製図／抽選 room for a rehearsal. My other guests—の中で them G. B. 厳しい and William Powell—wandered in and out, amused themselves as they wished, and looked on Noel and me as on two やめる pleasant but やめる mad creatures.
Noel, Charles Cochran, and I decided to go into 共同 on the play, so when we opened at the 不死鳥／絶品 Theatre it was:
Noel had imbued me with the character of Amanda. In the cast with us were Everley Gregg, Laurence Olivier, and Adrianne Allen (then Mrs. Raymond Massey), and on the first night Noel gave me a 特に bound and 初期のd 始める，決める of all his plays, 含むing 私的な Lives, which bore the dedication, "For Gertie, with my undying 感謝 for her exquisite, polished, and 極度の慎重さを要する 業績／成果 of Amanda. Noel, 1930."
Everyone remembers the success of Noel's 私的な Lives, but we had our baby 苦痛s even with that for a 簡潔な／要約する moment. We have a very strict 検閲 guiding the 運命 of all plays 現在のd in England, and 私的な Lives had to pass the Lord Chamberlain's 批判的な 注目する，もくろむ. So in 予定 course the play was sent to Lord Cromer at St. James's Palace, and it （機の）カム 支援する with some 批評 in regard to the scene on the sofa!
Of course without that scene 私的な Lives would have been like beef without 情熱. We were all suddenly cast into the depths of despair. So Noel betook himself to Lord Cromer with 許可 to read the play.
Lord Cromer 証明するd himself to be a man of 広大な／多数の／重要な judgment in regard to what can be 配達するd to the public and in taking into consideration the manner in which the fare is served to them. So having enjoyed his afternoon with Noel and the delicate and charming 治療 of the play, he gave us the green light, and not a word of Noel's script was censored.
So we opened in Edinburgh for the tryout, and Charles Cochran wrote me
...If there is another actress on the English 行う／開催する／段階 who could give the 業績／成果 you did on Monday night in Edinburgh, l don't know her. I am proud. I am happy—and I am 感謝する.
With affectionate regards, believe me, my 奇蹟 Child,
Yours very 心から,
CHARLES B. COCHRAN
Dear Charles Cochran. What a long time it was since I had been one of his children in The 奇蹟!
When we opened in London three weeks later, at the brand-new 不死鳥／絶品 Theatre in Charing Cross Road, 私的な Lives was already a 抱擁する success. The 圧力（をかける） made much of Noel. Lines from the play were 引用するd by smart people. When I, as Amanda, 観察するd of myself: "I don't think I'm 特に コンビナート／複合体, but I know I'm unreliable," hundreds of women snatched the line as referring to themselves.
I also 蓄える／店d up 未来 trouble for myself. Ever since I played 私的な Lives people have been 混乱させるing me with the ヘロイン of Noel's play. They think I must be brittle, irresponsible, and have the emotional 安定 of a shuttlecock.
私的な Lives ran three months in London, even though it could have run much longer. Noel does not like long runs. We sailed on New Year's Eve to open at the Times Square Theatre in New York 早期に in January 1931.
My 着せる／賦与するs in the play were all made for me by Molyneux. He made me beautiful things, and Amanda did 司法（官） to them.
When we （機の）カム to New York I brought along a 十分な number of dresses for use in the play to last six weeks. At the end of that period Molyneux sent me an 完全に new 始める，決める which I wore during the next six weeks. In this way my 着せる／賦与するs were always fresh. And even though they were copied, we never changed their design. They were part and 小包 of Amanda.
One of my 所有物／資産／財産s was an extra-long cigarette 支えるもの／所有者, and this Edgar Wallace 供給（する）d. He kept me in 支えるもの／所有者s, all 示すd E.W., for the run of the play.
I had 推定する／予想するd Bert would 会合，会う me when we ドッキングする／減らす／ドックに入れるd. But he did not. A radiogram to the ship told me he was at Palm Beach. In a few days he returned. When he did, I 設立する him strangely different from the Bert who had seen me off to England the previous spring. He was distrait. He 認める he was terribly worried about the 財政上の 状況／情勢, which had grown worse instead of better. America was tobogganing into a 不景気, and no one, 明らかに, knew how to stop it. Like everyone else, I had lost my paper 利益（をあげる）s and a lot more. But I still had my work. 私的な Lives was repeating the success it had had in London.
One day I was lunching with Bert and some friends on Long Island. When we left the （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する I went into the 砕く room. I was seated in 前線 of the mirror, putting on my lipstick, when I became aware of women's 発言する／表明するs in the 隣接するing room.
"Did you see? That was Gertrude Lawrence."
"Really?"
"Yes, she's 支援する. She's with Bert Taylor."
There was a little ripple of laughter.
"I wonder what the other one will do, now that Gertrude's 支援する."
"It will be 利益／興味ing to see..."
The 発言する／表明するs floated off. A door slammed. Silence.
I sat and 星／主役にするd at my reflection, which 星／主役にするd 支援する at me. Who was this "other one"? Was she the 推論する／理由 for the change I had 設立する in Bert? I had to know.
I waited until I could stroll out nonchalantly and join Bert outside. We got into the car and 長，率いるd for New York. I made conversation—gay, inconsequential. All the time I wondered how to introduce the 支配する which lay 激しい on my heart.
We were nearly at our 目的地 when Bert said something about the many changes which were taking place in America 予定 to the 財政上の 不景気. This gave me an 開始. I asked him 直接／まっすぐに if his feeling for me had not changed. "I feel that it has, Bert."
He did not reply at once. His silence told me more than words could have told. So I went on 猛烈に:
"Perhaps there is someone else now?"
"井戸／弁護士席...I せねばならない have told you, darling. There is a girl I've been seeing a lot of..."
"I know," I said きっぱりと.
He went on then to tell me about her. A pang 発射 through me when he said: "I noticed her first because, in a way, she reminded me of you."
"Have you known her long?"
"No. Only やめる recently. You were away, Peaches. You were gone so long. I 行方不明になるd you."
That brought another pang. And the memory of Philip. Philip had waited too long, and had lost me. Now I had stayed away too long and had lost Bert. I thought: people 令状 plays about things like this. Poets 令状 poems about it. And it's true. It really happens. If I had not stayed on in London to play 私的な Lives, if I had come 支援する to America in the 落ちる, Bert would not have 設立する this girl whose first charm for him was that she made him think of me.
"You don't know how it is, Gertrude. When I come uptown in the afternoon, I'm tired. I want to relax, have dinner, play a little 橋（渡しをする） or something, and then get to bed at a decent hour. I don't want to sit around alone all evening until your show is over to take you out to supper, and then sit up half the night. I have to be downtown 早期に in the morning. I know it's too much to ask you to give up the theater for me," he ended.
Many women, I know, would have answered that wistful half question 異なって from the way I had to answer it. Between a young, handsome, charming millionaire and a career in the theater they would have 設立する nothing to choose. In a sense, my own choice was made for me. It was made by that something in my 血 which had made me spend two precious shillings to have cards printed:
which had 圧力（をかける）d me to run away from home to 捜し出す my fortune with my father. That same 説得力のある 軍隊 had given me 決意 to stick it out with him through the 苦しめるing ups and 負かす／撃墜するs.
Give up the theater? I couldn't. The theater was my world. I belonged to it. To ask me to abandon it was like asking a musician never to touch a piano or a violin again. Everything that has value has its price. Nothing 価値（がある） having is ever 手渡すd to you gratis. A career in the theater is no exception to this hard-and-急速な／放蕩な 支配する.
The price of my career, I thought 激しく in the moment before I gave Bert his answer, has always been my personal happiness. Would this always be true? Would there never come a time when I could have a career and a happy marriage—as other women I knew?
"I 申し込む／申し出d to give it up once before, Bert, and you 辞退するd. Now I just can't. Not even for you. Also you aren't in love with me any more, are you?"
"I don't know," he said. "But I'm terribly fond of you, Peaches. I always shall be."
"I understand," I said. "It's for you to make the 決定／判定勝ち（する）. You know now how I feel about you."
We left it like that. But it was the end, and I knew it. Sooner or later—and I 嫌疑者，容疑者／疑うd it would be sooner—the news that Bert Taylor and Gertrude Lawrence were "no longer that way about each other" would be a pointed paragraph for the gossip writers. If those two women I had overheard knew that Bert was 利益／興味d in another girl, then others knew it. Or soon would. New York, like London, is in many 尊敬（する）・点s a small town.
I told no one except Helen 負かす／撃墜するs, who often traveled with me and, out of friendship, 行為／法令／行動するd as my 長官. No one ever had a more loyal friend, and I knew I could count on her discretion. Noel was wonderfully understanding. He asked me lots of questions and gave me lots of good advice. One evening he said to me suddenly out of the blue, "I want to talk to you," and he followed me into my dressing room.
"You think your heart is broken. But it isn't. It's only your pride that is 傷つける."
I did not answer. My 神経s were unsteady, and at this 調印する of friendship I felt the 涙／ほころびs rise. I must not cry. Not over a man who had decided he did not want me. Yes, my pride was 傷つける. And I had woven dreams around Bert, dreams of a life together which Pam and his boy and girl could 株. At least one part of me had 手配中の，お尋ね者 this from the earliest days. But there was another 味方する to my nature which would not be 否定するd—the 味方する that was 満足させるd only by the theater and which could not give this up.
Philip had not understood this about me. Nor had Bert. Both had 申し込む／申し出d me 安全, and Bert 広大な／多数の／重要な wealth with the 安全. But in each 事例／患者 at the price of my career.
I tried to get 持つ／拘留する of myself, to 安定した my 神経s. But I had lost 負わせる and I could not sleep. I jumped when anyone spoke to me. One day I went to the doctor about my throat. He took one look at me and made his 決定／判定勝ち（する）. I was put to bed in a 私的な hospital. Noel was sent for and told I was too ill to go on that night. I would have to have at least a fortnight's 残り／休憩（する）.
Noel did a wonderful thing. He 辞退するd to play 私的な Lives with anyone else as Amanda. Instead, he took the 前例のない step of の近くにing the show for two weeks. He and the others of the company ran 負かす／撃墜する to Nassau for a holiday, and I meekly obeyed the doctor's orders.
When Noel （機の）カム 支援する he popped in to see me. I crowed at him:
"Look at me—I've 伸び（る）d ten 続けざまに猛撃するs. I feel fit as a fiddle."
"You and your ten 続けざまに猛撃するs," he snorted. "Look at me, my girl. Look at that tan." He pulled open his shirt to show me what the Nassau sun had done for his midriff. Then we （機の）カム 支援する to 私的な Lives. We agreed to 再開する on the Monday after 復活祭.
Everyone said it 簡単に could not be done. You couldn't 再開する a popular play after a fortnight, and make it a success again. But we did. The last two months of the run of 私的な Lives were even more successful than the play had been at first. When Noel and I left the play 早期に in June, my part was taken by Madge Kennedy and Noel's by Otto Kruger, and 私的な Lives continued its run on 小旅行する.
I was eager to go home. On the crossing I kept 説 to myself: "I'm going home. Home. This time I shall stay." I had cabled my friends, 含むing Philip, that I was coming, and their welcomes made me feel glad. Philip cabled he would 会合，会う me at Southampton. I looked 今後 to seeing him again. When I had played 私的な Lives in London I had seen him several times.
On the day before we were to get in I had a radiogram from him 説 he could not 会合，会う me, as he had to go to the country, but would see me soon in London. I was disappointed, but could understand. Philip's father had died and he had more 責任／義務s now than 以前は.
Mother was at the ドッキングする／減らす／ドックに入れる to 会合，会う me. She had brought Pam. We took the boat train up to London and I went to the Savoy. In those familiar surroundings I began to feel really at home.
The Savoy has always been a happy place for me. It was the first of London's big hotels I ever went into. I'll never forget, I ate my first oyster there. 物陰／風下 White and Clay Smith had taken me there to lunch to celebrate my 契約 with André Charlot. They ordered oysters, which I had never eaten. I looked a bit fearfully at the things lying in their 爆撃するs. I'd often heard it said: "You have to watch out for oysters."
Clay whispered to me: "They're alive. Or they're supposed to be."
I whispered 支援する: "What happens if they aren't?"
"If you eat one you get ptomaine."
"Oh." I laid 負かす／撃墜する my oyster fork. I was taking no 危険s about getting sick and losing that 契約.
"Squirt a bit of lemon on them," Clay advised confidentially. "And watch. If the oyster squirms, that shows he's alive and you can eat him."
I squirted the lemon painstakingly on each of the creatures and scrutinized its reactions. Not a 選び出す／独身 oyster shuddered in its 爆撃する. All dead, I thought. Lor', suppose I'd eaten one. I watched 物陰／風下 and Clay putting theirs away with no regard for the oysters' activity. All the 残り／休憩（する） of the day I 推定する／予想するd one or both of my new friends to die of ptomaine. When nothing happened my cockney 疑惑s were roused and I asked someone else about oysters and their habits.
I put it 負かす／撃墜する to 支払う／賃金 Clay 支援する for pulling my 脚.
The six months I had spent in America seemed no more than six days. Each time the telephone rang, I thought it would be Philip, but it was not. On impulse I rang his house in Herefordshire, only to be told he was in London.
What did that mean?
He said he would be in the country and couldn't 会合，会う the boat.
I called his town house. Presently I heard his 発言する／表明する.
"Philip darling, is someone with you?"
"Yes."
"That means you can't talk 自由に now?"
"Yes. That's it."
"Very 井戸／弁護士席. I understand. But I want you to know I'm at the Savoy."
"I'll come and take you out to dinner," he said. "It will be late. After eight-thirty."
"I'll wait," I 約束d.
When Philip arrived he brought me orchids. He gave them to me with the formal 儀礼 which was one of the things about him I always loved. He had a wonderful way at times of making even やめる a small thing seem like an occasion. He kissed me and said how glad he was to see me. Then, as I opened the florist's box and took out the flowers, he stood by the mantel, looking not at me, but at the hearth, 明らかに engrossed in his own thoughts.
"Where would you like to dine?" he asked presently.
"What about downstairs?"
"No, no. The Ritz. It's quieter there."
We had dinner. He asked me about New York, and how the play had gone. I told him about Bert, and that we were no longer engaged. He said he was sorry and hoped I wasn't too unhappy about it. Then he asked about my 計画（する）s for next season. We were like two people who had just been introduced. We were like strangers. There was something on his mind which he did not know how to tell me. I could see that.
When it got to be about eleven, Philip said 突然の: "I've got to be 押し進めるing off, Dormouse. I have to 会合，会う someone."
"会合 someone?" I 問い合わせd. "Where?"
"Yes. At a theater."
"Oh."
Philip said slowly, "Madeleine Carroll. She's in a play at the 不死鳥／絶品 with Marie Tempest. I 約束d to stop for her and take her to a party."
"Oh."
It must have been my トン, for he said, as though he 設立する it hard to get the words out: "I've asked her to marry me. We 発表するd our 約束／交戦 day before yesterday."
The day before yesterday! While I was still at sea. What a home-coming.
There was something more I had to know. I asked him how long he had been in love with Madeleine. He said, just a little while.
"Perhaps if you had come 支援する sooner, Dormouse. You were away so long."
That was what Bert had said. And now Philip. Would I always be too late for happiness? I thought 猛烈に.
In the course of the next few weeks I learned that though your chosen work may cost you ひどく it 慰安s you in times of 強調する／ストレス. Above all, if you are a woman and therefore apt to be emotional and personal, it 強要するs you to be impersonal. It pulls you up by the bootstraps out of the bog of self-pity.
That is your reward.
And the reward is 価値（がある） the price you 支払う／賃金 for it. No 事柄 how 広大な／多数の／重要な. I 設立する it so.
I held to my 意向 to remain in England for a number of years, and turned 負かす／撃墜する several American 申し込む／申し出s. I felt I must re-identify myself with my own people and with the British theater.
I was working at 最高の，を越す 速度(を上げる）, and work was good. I played in Take Two from One, which had been translated from the Spanish of 市場Ãnez Sierra. The play was only fair, and the audience did not like me in a 役割 which was so foreign to the parts I had played.
I had better luck with Can the ヒョウ...? with Ian Hunter, at the Theatre 王室の in the Haymarket that winter. I was the ヒョウ of the 肩書を与える, an irresponsible, untidy, but fascinating lady whose husband tried, unsuccessfully, to 改革（する） her. The play, by Ronald ジーンズs, got good notices.
In that 役割 I innovated a new fashion—an 利益／興味ing white lock swept away from the forehead. It caught on すぐに. Women began flocking to the hairdresser's for a "Riviera bleach." If I couldn't change my 位置／汚点／見つけ出すs, I could make the other girls wear my （土地などの）細長い一片.
I spent several weeks lazing in the hot 日光 at the Monte Carlo Beach Hotel reading John 先頭 Druten's new play. John called it Behold We Live, from the 詩（を作る） in St. Paul's epistle, "as dying, and, behold, we live." Gilbert Miller had arranged to produce it at the St. James's Theatre in August, with Sir Gerald du Maurier, Dame May Whitty, and me. Auriol 物陰／風下 was to direct it.
The play 広げるd the story of Sarah, a young lady with a past, who had 試みる／企てるd to commit 自殺. Her 事例／患者 was turned over to an 著名な K.C., who fell in love with her. His arguments made Sarah see that 自殺 is 臆病な／卑劣な; that it is a bigger thing to live than to 訴える手段／行楽地 to 小火器.
Marriage between Sarah and the K.C. was impossible, as he was already married. She became his mistress—a 関係 which the man's mother understood and forgave. However, their happiness was 爆破d by the K.C.'s sudden illness. He was 軍隊d to を受ける an 操作／手術, and died as a result. Sarah, unable to be with him at the last, was left alone to be 慰安d by, and to 慰安, his mother.
It was a sad play, of course, but 深く，強烈に moving and uplifting. Sir Gerald played the K.C. magnificently. The critics commented approvingly on my "抑制," which pleased me no end. Those same gentlemen of the 圧力（をかける） had written 以前 of my need to develop that 質.
At the première Lady du Maurier and two of her daughters, Daphne and Angela, were in the 行う／開催する／段階 box, and （機の）カム backstage to congratulate us all. But that was the only time Lady du Maurier （機の）カム to the play, which was strange, because she loved the theater. I often wondered about it. A few years later, when Sir Gerald died, I learned the 推論する／理由. Sir Gerald 苦しむd from the same incurable 病気 as the K.C. in our play. I do not think he knew this, but Lady du Maurier either knew it or 嫌疑者，容疑者／疑うd the truth. 自然に, she could not go to Behold We Live night after night to watch her husband portray his own 運命.
I felt that with Behold We Live I had reached a high 位置／汚点／見つけ出す in my career. I, who had begun in light musical comedy and revues, was now starring as a 劇の actress in a serious 役割 with other truly 広大な／多数の／重要な actors. I stopped in at Cartier's one day and ordered a pin for Auriol, to whom I was immensely 感謝する. I had it engraved with her 指名する and "Behold We Live," and my 初期のs. She wore it almost 絶えず until her death. In her will she bequeathed it 支援する to me.
This Inconstancy, with Nigel Bruce and Leslie Banks, followed Behold We Live, at Wyndham's Theatre. When I went into my dressing room I experienced one of the high moments in my life. My 指名する was on the door in gold letters, 追加するd to a long 名簿（に載せる）／表（にあげる） of very famous 星／主役にするs who had been there in the past. Ellen Terry's 指名する was there. And Marie Tempest's. And Irene Vanbrugh's.
While I was playing in This Inconstancy something happened which seemed unimportant at the time—just one of those things which happen every day, which are pleasant, but not momentous. One evening some friends （機の）カム backstage to see me and brought with them a very tall, 静かな young American whom they introduced as Richard Aldrich. Little did I know that he was to enter my life later on.
I was working terribly hard. I needed to. For one thing, I was in 負債. I had never 回復するd from the bad habit of spending lavishly. I know I am foolish about money. Some women are. I do not have a true sense of its value. Either I value it too much, so that I am 現実に stingy about a few funny things, or I spend a 広大な／多数の／重要な 取引，協定 too much.
I was 圧力（をかける）d by creditors in England and in America. I was worried. I did all the work I could, 含むing a film No Funny 商売／仕事, which I made with Owen Nares. I went into 商売／仕事 with two friends, Lady Diana Manners and Felicity Tree (Mrs. Cory Wright), and we opened a flower shop in Berkeley Square.
When I was a child the family used to discuss possible 占領／職業s for me. One of these was to be a young lady in a flower shop. This seemed to Mother a genteel vocation. And one which might lead to something. She reminded me that Cousin Ruby had risen from 存在 a model at Harrod's to 存在 a model for Raffel Kirchner. Cousin Ruby, through Kirchner's famous 製図／抽選s, was the 主要な pin-up girl of World War I. Her pretty 直面する smiled at Tommies from the 塀で囲むs of dugouts and ざん壕s. From there to the Gaiety Theatre and marriage to Sir Henry Grayson's son had been but a few 平易な steps.
"Why can't you be like your Cousin Ruby?"
Our flower shop was lovely with flower frescoes on the 塀で囲むs by Oliver Messel, the clever 行う／開催する／段階 designer, and gay （土地などの）細長い一片d awnings. And it was popular. But it was also a lot of work, and I was busy with many things. I don't think it made me any money, though it was fun while it lasted. We called it "Fresh Flowers, 限られた／立憲的な," and our friends called it "Faded Flowers, 会社にする／組み込むd."
Another way I took to 増加する my 収入s was to 令状 some articles for the Daily Mirror. The paper said women readers would like to know my 見解（をとる）s on all sorts of things, so I gave them, 自由に. One day a feature writer discovered Pam at Roedean and asked her to give an interview on her mother. Pam was no more 気が進まない to do this than any normal schoolgirl would be. She gave the 新聞記者／雑誌記者 a good story—about how her mother really disliked her work and would prefer to stay at home and live a 静かな, retired life away from the 行う／開催する／段階, of which she was tired.
The paper printed it. It was rather awful. It took some living 負かす／撃墜する and it took some explaining to make my daughter realize that publicity can be a two-辛勝する／優位d sword and needs careful 扱うing.
一方／合間 the 法案s and the dunning letters 機動力のある. I had put some of my 事件／事情／状勢s into the 手渡すs of Fanny Holtzmann, the lawyer in New York to whom Noel Coward and Clifton Webb had recommended me. Fanny understood the theater and its people. She had helped me out of some difficulties when I was playing 私的な Lives in New York. But now she was in America. I thought, she'll be coming to London soon. She comes over often. I'll get 持つ／拘留する of her then and get her to help me out of the muddle of my 税金 複雑化s and 法案s.
That autumn Charles Cochran put on a play called Nymph Errant which was made from the novel of the same 指名する by James Laver. It was the story of an English schoolgirl on her way home from school in Switzerland who met a Frenchman and 始める，決める out with him on a 一連の adventures. These carried her 最終的に into the most fantastic places. Incredibly, she （機の）カム 支援する at the end still wide-注目する，もくろむd, and やめる unaware of what she had seen and escaped from. One of the amazing things about this story was that it was the work of a 静かな, middle-老年の scholar, who was 長，率いる curator at the Victoria and Albert Museum.
I adored Nymph Errant. It has remained one of my favorite plays. Cole Porter wrote the music for it and Agnes de Mille arranged the ballets. I 手配中の，お尋ね者 to play it in America, and we would have done so but for the problem of 財政／金融ing such an (a)手の込んだ／(v)詳述する 生産／産物 at a time when America was still in the throes of the 不景気.
Nymph Errant was a tremendous success in London. Nonetheless, I was worried. Not over the play or my 未来, but about my 財政上の 事件／事情／状勢s; it seemed that the more money I made, the more I spent. I didn't seem able to get ahead, and my 事件／事情／状勢s were in a bewildering 絡まる.
Then the ax fell. The British 政府 （機の）カム 負かす／撃墜する on me for 未払いの 所得税s on my American 収入s dating from some years 支援する. As a British 支配する and 居住（者） I had not known that I was liable to 課税 in both countries.
The news of my 税金 problems which appeared in the 圧力（をかける） opened the 注目する，もくろむs of my creditors. All at once they descended on me. The straw that broke the camel's 支援する was a laundry 法案 for fifty 続けざまに猛撃するs. I could not 支払う／賃金 it, and as a consequence I was 軍隊d into 破産.
I understand that the British 法律 which covers 破産s is much more 厳しい than the 法律 in America. I only know it was exceedingly 厳しい with me. When I （機の）カム out of Carey Street 法廷，裁判所 I had nothing, literally, but the 着せる／賦与するs I stood in. Nothing else. My cars, my apartment, my jewels, even most of my 着せる／賦与するs had been 掴むd.
Fortunately the 災害 did not 影響する／感情 Pam. Thanks to that 信用 基金 I had 設立するd for her long before. I never 中止するd to be glad of that.
There （機の）カム a day when Dorothy, my faithful maid, Mack, my dog, and I stood on the pavement outside the house in Portland Place. We had literally not a roof to はう under. No money and no credit. This was all the more 驚くべき／特命の／臨時の because I was appearing in a successful play—and on the surface was a successful actress.
法案 Linnett and 法案 O'Bryen, who were my 経営者／支配人s, （機の）カム to our 救助（する）. 法案 Linnett 申し込む／申し出d me his flat in the Albany while he went to stay with 法案 O'Bryen. It was a warm, friendly, encouraging gesture, and I shall never forget them for it.
It was up to me to start all over again, this time with a 負担 of 負債s to 支払う／賃金 off.
I did 支払う／賃金 them off, all of them. It took me two years. I could have borrowed from friends, even from Noel, but something held me 支援する. It was not just pride. It was a sincere 願望（する） to 軍隊 myself to を受ける the discipline which could be learned only by 厳しい self-否定.
With the play still running, I started a film, which meant that at five-thirty every morning I was up and caught the workman's tram to Denham to 行為／法令／行動する in Rembrandt with Charles Laughton. After working all day at the studio I hurried 支援する to the theater to go on in Tonight at 8.30. When the film was 完全にするd, I 受託するd an 約束／交戦 at the Cafê de Paris, where I sang nightly after the theater.
Two years of work at that pace, and I was 解放する／自由な of 負債.
Noel brought Tonight at 8.30 to New York. すぐに I landed in New York, I 設立する myself 直面するd by a new array of 負債s. It seems that under the British 法律 I could be （疑いを）晴らすd of 破産 in that country while my 負債s in America remained 未払いの. I had not known this. I thought I was done with it all, but I was not. I had to go through it all again—the unpleasant publicity, the 調査するing into my 事件／事情／状勢s, the 法廷，裁判所 訴訟／進行s. Again I turned to Fanny Holtzmann, but she was in Hollywood. Her brother David took over my 事件／事情／状勢s until she returned.
Between us we worked out an 協定 which left me 解放する／自由な to do my own work, to finish the run of Tonight at 8:30, and then to go into Rachel Crothers' play Susan and God, while my 財政上の and 合法的な problems were taken over by the Holtzmann office.
Noel read the play and 発言／述べるd: "The only good thing about it is the 肩書を与える." But I had been impressed by it when Rachel Crothers first read it to me. We talked it over. She agreed that several scenes had to be rewritten, and while she was doing this I ran home to England for the 載冠（式）／即位（式）. I went with a 平和的な mind. I was really 解放する／自由な of 負債 at last, on both 味方するs of the 大西洋. My 事件／事情／状勢s were in order.
I thought, that summer, holidaying in England: I'm a very lucky woman.
I have Pam. I have my work. I have friends, hopes for the 未来. I have lived a 十分な, busy, active, and on the whole happy life.
I shall always be glad I saw London during the 載冠（式）／即位（式） summer. It was wonderful—a last burst of splendor before the 嵐／襲撃する burst.
I （機の）カム 支援する to America to open in Susan and God, which played 首尾よく on Broadway for two seasons. After its run, in 1939, I remember Samson Raphaelson trying to read me the script of his play Skylark while the 無線で通信する in my living room gave 前へ／外へ the news of Munich. My heart was 十分な of forebodings.
It was not long before those forebodings were 正当化するd. While I played in Skylark my country was 急落（する），激減（する）d into war.
It made me restless and uneasy.
I was asked to play at the summer theater at Dennis on Cape Cod. The 申し込む／申し出 sounded delightful and I said I would go. I remember my trip by train. There was something exciting about it. I knew suddenly that I was 乗る，着手するing upon an adventure.
John Golden had recommended my going to play Skylark on the Cape. True to form and his love of showmanship he sent a fantastic story ahead of me, about the 肉親，親類d of woman I was. It gave the impression that I was an exotic creature who drank only シャンペン酒, 需要・要求するd 特に heated cars, and 辞退するd to sleep in any but her own extra-罰金 sheets.
I have since been told that when Richard Aldrich, who was the 生産者 for the Cape Playhouse, read this he exclaimed: "Oh, nuts."
I have never 非難するd him.
I got off the Cape Codder about half-past ten in the pitch dark. The man who led me to a car was 曖昧な when I asked about my luggage and not very enthusiastic. This was the same Richard Aldrich whom I had met in London several years before. Though he was passably polite, I got the impression he was not overimpressed by me.
He told me he was 運動ing me to the cottage which was to be 地雷 for my stay. I could not see it, for there were no lights in the windows when we drove up. I began to feel that Cape Cod was a very standoffish place.
Mr. Aldrich guided me up the path-and into the door.
"Wait there and I'll switch on the lights."
I waited. The lights （機の）カム on, and before my 注目する，もくろむs grew used to them, people suddenly began popping out from under the （米）棚上げする／（英）提議するs, out of doors, from everywhere. 発言する／表明するs cried welcomes and "Surprise! Surprise!" It was a party to welcome me, and the leader of it was Jules Glaenzer, who had been my friend since my first winter in America. の中で the guests were all the members of the Playhouse cast and Radie Harris, who was covering the 開始 for her 無線で通信する program and her column in Variety.
I played at Dennis through that summer season. That winter, when I went about town, I had a new beau—Richard Aldrich. And a new happiness in my heart.
Richard and I took our time. We both 手配中の，お尋ね者 to be very, very sure. I had made one mistake in marriage. I did not want to make another. It was curious about Richard—it was as though he 連合させるd in one person the different things I had 設立する and admired in Philip Astley and in Bert Taylor. He was Boston and Harvard, and had been a 銀行業者, but above all he loved the theater. He was the first man in my life who understood what my career in the theater meant to me—the first man who really understood me.
And so we were married. On the Fourth of July 1940. We chose this date because it had special significance for both of us. For Richard it was his country's birthday and for me it was my own.
For years I had said to myself: when I marry it is going to be a country wedding. I pictured myself 存在 married in the evening in 黒人／ボイコット lace and by candlelight.
We were married in the evening on the Cape. But in the 注ぐing rain—Richard in white flannels and I in a gray sports 控訴. We ran through the sopping grass 負かす／撃墜する to his cottage and were married there, with two friends and my maid Dorothy as 証言，証人／目撃するs.
Then, 手渡す in 手渡す, under one umbrella, we ran 支援する up the path to the house of the Fran Harts, where friends were gathered to 迎える／歓迎する us.
So we were married....
"And we will live happily ever after," I said to Richard.
"If the war does not separate us."
"I know." My fingers 強化するd around his. The war was getting closer to America every week. At all times the thought of what was happening to London every night kept me grim company. "But if it comes, we'll take it together."
The next day I received a 電報電信 from Noel Coward which said:
[Noel Coward's short poem of congratulation has been omitted from this ebook for 推論する／理由s of copyright.]
To which I replied:
Dear Mr. C.,
You know me.
My parts I overact 'em.
As for the flowers,
I've searched for hours.
Dorothy must have packed 'em.
After we returned to New York I had to go into rehearsals for Lady in the Dark. に引き続いて this I went to Boston for the tryout. Richard was busy with his own 生産／産物s. After Lady in the Dark had been 首尾よく 開始する，打ち上げるd in New York, Richard and I moved into our new apartment and looked 今後 to our life together.
Then （機の）カム Pearl Harbor, and Richard, like millions of other husbands, volunteered to serve his country. He joined the 海軍 and went to war. I began to dream and 計画（する） how to get to the 前線 too.
Thursday, August 19, 1944. We are off at last. I am 令状ing this by the 道端, where our 軍用車隊 has 停止（させる）d by a （疑いを）晴らすing （軍の）野営地，陣営 for the night. We are parked like all the 侵略 軍用車隊s we saw last June. We are over fifty トラックで運ぶs, jeeps, et cetera, and one hundred and ten artistes—the largest E.N.S.A. outfit to sail for Normandy.
We 含む Diana Wynyard, Jessie Matthews, Bobbie Andrews, Margaret Rutherford, Ivor Novello, and many others whose 指名するs I don't know yet, but who all seem in 広大な／多数の／重要な form. Each 部隊 or company has its own 先頭, which 含むs beds and cook's galley. Part of my old 部隊 is with me and we are 目だつ for the three fattest people in the 軍用車隊: Leslie, our ピアニスト, two hundred and fifty 続けざまに猛撃するs; Joe, the drummer, at almost that; and Zoë who 重さを計るs in at just under two hundred and has comfortably given up worrying about it. These three, 加える Zoë's husband, Basil, Clarence, the violinist, and I 株 one sleeping coach. The four men are in the tail end in bunks, then comes the lavatory; and the 前線 部分 and the galley are 占領するd by Zoë and me, with beds slung over the dining （米）棚上げする／（英）提議する like uppers in a Pullman. The officer and the corporal driver are sleeping in the （軍の）野営地，陣営 by the 味方する of the road. But it's pretty の近くに ４半期/4分の1s, and there are a lot of advantages in 存在 slender. Mary Barrett cried this morning when we left E.N.S.A. （警察，軍隊などの）本部 at Hindhead. We all wished she could have come with us, but 今後 we are on our own. We are now really and truly in the Army and 支配する to rigid Army 支配するs. Our 護衛するing officer's 指名する is Stokes, so of course he is now known as "Pogis."
I have just been up the road and vamped some cup hooks out of the 地元の 建設業者 so we can hang things up in our sleeper.
I have made up Zoë's bunk and my own, swept the 床に打ち倒す, and put everything I shall need under my pillow, as it will be dark when we are called, and no lights must be shown here or at the ドッキングする／減らす／ドックに入れる. I must remember not to sit bolt upright suddenly in my bunk. The 通関手続き／一掃 is 正確に／まさに two feet.
We were called at 3: 30 A.M., rose, dressed in the dark, and went to mess at the （軍の）野営地，陣営, carrying our own mess 道具s and つまずくing the half-mile 負かす／撃墜する the road by torchlight.
Three E.N.S.A. 部隊s left for the port of embarkation around 4: 30 A.M. We returned to the 軍用車隊 until nine-thirty. When we got going, everybody was excited. We rolled into Portsmouth at ten o'clock; our パスポートs were 診察するd and we were 問題／発行するd "Geneva Cards," in which we are 率d as 中尉／大尉／警部補s in the British Army. This in 事例／患者 we are taken 囚人s. Before 乗る，着手するing on our LST, she filled up with 戦車／タンクs and our own 器具／備品, and we had the 疑わしい 楽しみ of seeing several hundred German 囚人s come 岸に. 疑わしい, because they were a sorry, disillusioned-looking lot. の中で them was a small boy, nine years old, in German uniform, said to be the son of a 徴集兵d ロシアの, who had 辞退するd to work for the enemy without his boy. The mother had been killed. The British 当局 were 存在 肉親，親類d to him, and he seemed very able to take care of himself, although he could not speak English or German, but kept 説 "Merci."
We are now 現実に "away" on our trip to フラン. It is a beautiful day, the crossing should be a good one, and it is good to get out of the coaches. We have had "召集（する）," "Mae West" 演習, and are now in the wardroom having tea while we （疑いを）晴らす the port—this for 安全 推論する／理由s. The crossing is 予定 to take about eighteen hours. So we sleep 船内に, and are scheduled to arrive in Normandy "いつか Saturday."
A good night and a good breakfast at 7:00 A.M.
We have been joined by an enormous 軍用車隊 and by 地雷 掃海艇s, as we are now in the "地雷 path." The beaches are almost in sight.
I have been helping the 海軍 Red Cross to peel potatoes. They tell me that once on the other 味方する these LSTs become hospital ships and are used to 避難させる our own and German 負傷させるd 囚人s. Most of the 逮捕（する）d German officers are very arrogant and 辞退する 医療の 治療, 注射s, and even food, for 恐れる of 存在 毒（薬）d. They have been taught to believe this. One 負傷させるd German aviator spat at our 医療の officers and kept asking, "How far England?" He was in 広大な／多数の／重要な need of attention in general but 辞退するd to be 扱う／治療するd. Finally one of the 医療の corpsmen said, "Now look 'ere, if you don't be'ave yerself, we'll send the lot of ye to London where the 飛行機で行くing 爆弾s are!" That did it! The sick bay is always 負かす／撃墜する in the 戦車／タンク deck in a 変えるd LST. They said you could hear that German's 叫び声をあげる 権利 up to the captain's 橋（渡しをする）. Another member of the master race 手配中の，お尋ね者 to know how far the Germans had 前進するd into Sussex.
Our LST （機の）カム across like a bird, and we dropped 錨，総合司会者 at twelve-thirty yesterday, nineteenth, at Corselles, which was one of our first beachheads on D-Day. It all looked very 静かな and far from warlike except for hundreds of ships of all sizes and 形態／調整s doing every 肉親，親類d of different 職業 and the dreadful shambles made by the 破壊 of the German beach 要塞s. We were a 戦車／タンク 運送／保菌者, so we had to 荷を降ろす by 開始 the bulkheads, letting 負かす／撃墜する the ramp, et cetera. It's 脅すing at first to see the 乗組員 deliberately open the entire 屈服する of the ship; one is sure the sea will 急ぐ in and 沈む the clumsy, ひどく laden （手先の）技術. We had to stand by until the tide was low enough for the 戦車／タンクs to take to the sands.
Some of the 乗組員 went over the 味方する for a swim, and I 手配中の，お尋ね者 to. Perhaps I looked wistful, because the sailors 船内に the U.S.LCT (6) 767, which was standing by, called across the water:
"Say, sister, why don't you go in?"
"I would," I called 支援する, "if I had some trunks."
"We'll 直す／買収する，八百長をする you up. Wait a sec."
Several pairs of 手渡すs were laid on a 抱擁する sailor. He was 押し進めるd, protestingly, behind a group which 保護物，者d him, and his yowls told that his capacious trunks had been pulled from him. The trunks, decidedly outsize, were 投げ上げる／ボディチェックするd over to our deck.
The Yanks had dared me to come on in.
There was nothing for it but to find a secluded corner where I could slip out of my uniform and into the trunks. They hung limply around me fore and aft. Zoë 供給（する）d a bra—one of her own and on the same 規模 as the trunks. I was 安全に pinned into it, a cap was produced from somewhere, and to the delighted shrieks of our E.N.S.A. members I was 押し進めるd 今後 to the rail.
With 元気づけるs from the Yanks I dived off the ramp and swam 岸に to 始める，決める foot on French 国／地域 for the first time since 1937. It was glorious.
I must stop here to tell the sequel to my swimming 岸に on the Normandy beachhead. An account of it appeared in Life magazine. すぐに afterward the editors received a letter from Ensign J. W. Wray of the U.S.LCT (6) 767 of which the final paragraph read:
"The trunks which she borrowed from my 210-続けざまに猛撃する Mo.M.M. were most becomingly draped. We hope 行方不明になる Lawrence did not jettison the trunks during her 小旅行する of フラン, as we would like to have them 支援する to 一時停止する from the yardarm in memoriam."
The trunks were jettisoned, of course. Instead, I sent off to the 乗組員 of U.S.LCT (6) 767 a pair of my own pink silk lace-trimmed panties with the message:
Keep 'em 飛行機で行くing until I can fill 'em.
As we beached we heard the news that the British had made another 前進する, which brought them to within three miles of Paris.
"Ssh!" said Bobbie Andrews. "I think I can hear Alice Delysia singing the 'Marseillaise' even from here."
Alice had gone across for E.N.S.A. a week ahead of us, and much had been made in the 圧力（をかける） about her 選ぶing up a handful of French 国／地域 and 説: "I shall not go 支援する until I have thrown this over the Arc de Triomphe."
She has a 罰金 記録，記録的な／記録する for her work with E.N.S.A. and, 存在 French, she was 自然に longing to get to Paris. We drove in 軍用車隊 from the beach to Masefield, which is a （疑いを）晴らすing 倉庫・駅. There we met 陸軍大佐 Haggarth, our C.O., and were sent on to St. Aubin for four days. Ivor and the others have gone south to Bayeux. But we feel very superior because we're going "up the line."
On arriving at the village "estaminet," where our 部隊 is in billet, two of my 捕らえる、獲得するs were 行方不明の. I モーターd 支援する to Bayeux, hoping to retrieve them before the 軍用車隊 分裂（する） up. I went in a tiny jeep-sort of car known as a "Tilly" over twenty-two miles of 侵略-made 噴火口，クレーターs filled with oily mud. Captain Stokes Roberts drove, and we finally got there just as the 軍用車隊 was pulling out for somewhere else. No 停止（させる）ing is 許すd on the roads, which are packed with stuff coming to and from the 前線 line and the beaches. So we tacked の上に the end of the 軍用車隊. After about three miles the line slowed 負かす／撃墜する a bit and I jumped out of our Tilly and made a dash in search of the coach in which I had slept on the way from Hindhead. I 緊急発進するd 船内に, flung open the cupboard, and there were my 捕らえる、獲得するs! I grabbed them, jumped off, and waited for my chance to dash 支援する along the line. Then Captain Stokes Roberts reached out and yanked me and my baggage 船内に. We pulled out of the 軍用車隊 and returned—this time in pitch 不明瞭—to St. Aubin.
That 旅行 was terrific. 追跡者 弾丸s filled the sky. We met 軍用車隊s coming from the beaches—all 肉親，親類d of mysterious guns, cranes, 蓄える／店s, vanloads of German 囚人s, and miles of Red Cross cars creeping along slowly in the dark so as not to 揺さぶる the 負傷させるd on the bad roads. We got 支援する to the billet by midnight. No food, no light, and no water. But I had the 捕らえる、獲得するs, and a little brandy in a flask, and oh! boy, it was a lifesaver!
When I started to pin up my hair for the next day's show, I dropped a bobby pin. It sounds like a small thing, but in these circumstances they are as priceless as pearls. So I got out my flashlight, and there in its beam was my bobby pin and the sabot from a doll's foot—I shall keep it always for luck. I wonder what became of the child whose toy it was. But one learns not to ask questions.
We have been here at St. Aubin since we arrived in フラン, but we are doing two shows a day about eight キロs along the coast at Lion-sur-Mer. The place was 占領するd only a week ago and is a 完全にする mess of 地雷 噴火口，クレーターs, barbed wire, 爆弾d and 爆撃するd houses, and each day the sea brings in its dead.
Our theater was once the Casino-sur-Mer, very gay and chocolate-boxy, but now it is all Mer and no Casino. The building is 十分な of 穴を開けるs; no windows, no roof, no doors, and yet, somehow or other, we manage to put on a show. The men come in in hundreds. We are the first 芸能人s they've seen since D-Day.
This new life is going to be very strenuous. The food, when fresh, is often flyblown, and the canned food is always the same old Spam or いじめ（る） beef à la something. Everyone has a touch of dysentery—very painful and most inconvenient. How I would love to 嘘（をつく） 負かす／撃墜する in a dark, 静かな room somewhere with a hot-water 瓶／封じ込める. I clean my own shoes, bring up my own water for my bath, and do my own laundry, when there is water. I never seem to やめる catch up with myself or get any 残り／休憩（する）. But this is war as it really is, and I feel good and glad to be here.
The 態度 of these Norman French is a little puzzling at times, but やめる 理解できる in a way. At first these people (those who did not 死なせる／死ぬ in the 砲撃) were not at all sure that we could 解放する them from the enemy. They felt that our 上陸s would not be 永久の, and that all this 殺人，大当り, loss of homes, and general 大混乱 would be in vain; that the Germans would 押し進める us 支援する again. Now that they know they are really 解放する／自由な, they are more friendly to us. But even my Madame ツバメ said at déjeuner yesterday, "Mademoiselle, there were only forty Germans here in St. Aubin. All this 破壊 was not necessary." She was not a collaborationist—she has been 避難させるd from three different homes, but this was what she had been told, and she believed it.
明白に, her informants were lying. I have been along the beaches and have seen the German 弁護s—the 地雷s, the guns, and the famous West 塀で囲む. It took thousands of Germans to man all these. I have also seen our ships lying on the beaches with their 味方するs blown out and their 支援するs broken. And piles of knocked-out 戦車／タンクs whose occupants never even landed. The Norman Mesdames ツバメ are 単に repeating, parrot-like, what the enemy told them. It is very dangerous around here; several people were killed yesterday when a 地雷 was washed up on the shore. Nobody 運動s or walks anywhere unless in another's 跡をつけるs.
I hope to go to Caen on Sunday. In 準備 I shall wash my hair at the officers' mess 部隊 at Lion-sur-Mer today. They have electricity there, so I can get it 乾燥した，日照りの.
Today is again Sunday and I have been in "解放するd フラン" 正確に／まさに one week. If I thought I was in the Army before, I certainly know it now. We were to move さらに先に up the line today, but the 前進する has been so 早い it is impossible to get to a place in time to catch up with the Army. So we are staying on in the Casino for one more week, and the men are to be brought 支援する to us in トラックで運ぶs and lorries.
This morning we were put into an Army （軍の）野営地，陣営 with the ATS and the NAAFI and R.A.S.C. I am 令状ing this after 外出禁止令, by torchlight, in a room with plaster 塀で囲むs, 明らかにする boards, no bathroom of any sort, and my few 所持品 doing their best to give the place "the woman's touch"! I have put up some nails. It would seem the Army hangs everything up on the 床に打ち倒す. We are "out of bounds for officers and 軍隊／機動隊s," meals are eaten in mess, but we manage to have a lot of sort of school-寄宿舎 fun.
There is another E.N.S.A. 部隊 in this （軍の）野営地，陣営: Forsyth, 船員, and Farrell. They are Americans but have been with E.N.S.A. for three or four years. They do a lot of outdoor shows and played only yesterday to seven thousand men!
It has been a most impressive day. The Doc and Captain John Bradshaw called for me at two-thirty in a jeep, and we 始める，決める off to "do some shopping." We went to Cobourg—where only four days ago the Germans had been 持つ／拘留するing out. It was a dangerous and thrilling ride; we were all 武装した in 事例／患者 we ran into 狙撃者s. The roads are still 地雷d on both 味方するs, so no car could 危険 passing another, and along the way were many 抱擁する 噴火口，クレーターs filled with the 血 of human 存在s and cattle. There was no other car on the road going either way. I saw three French people on bicycles, pedaling 支援する to see if they could find their homes or friends.
The little town was 完全に dead, no 調印する of life, not a shop standing, not a soul about, but everywhere the many German skull-and-crossbones 調印するs 説 "Minen." And fields 十分な of the glider 計画（する）s which had landed our 空気／公表する-borne 軍隊／機動隊s.
We drove on 慎重に to the main street. Here the atmosphere was so eerie that I felt I had to speak in a whisper. The shops still stood there, although very much 損失d. Captain Bradshaw had been in the town the day before and 設立する two shops to which the people had returned, and he had brought chocolate and cigarettes for them. We parked the jeep, kept our 手渡すs on our guns, and stole 静かに along the 砂漠d street, keeping an 注目する，もくろむ open for any 逸脱する 狙撃者s.
At the door of a ワイン shop we stopped, and a dog barked from within. We spoke 静かに in French and in English, and presently an アイロンをかける 取調べ／厳しく尋問する in the door was opened by a young woman. She was alone, her husband a 囚人 in Germany and her child and mother évacuées. We gave her chocolate and cigarettes and told her the news and we bought some ワイン from her.
We went next to the farmacie. Here we 設立する mother, father, daughter, and young son. All had stayed hidden during the 包囲. The shop was a 完全にする 難破させる. However, in the cellar in an old brown leather 捕らえる、獲得する we 設立する perfume, 砕く, lipstick, and 紅, and we bought all they had. Each one of the family got something he 手配中の，お尋ね者: the boy got chocolate; Papa got タバコ; Maman got cigarettes, and daughter got conversation. She spoke good English, having been to Farnborough 近づく Aldershot for her holidays every summer in 平時（の）.
We gave them ワイン and then helped them bring 支援する some of their furniture, which they had hidden in the cellar of a 近づく-by house when the Germans first （機の）カム. We left finally and 約束d to return when we could with white bread and marmalade. These people are still numb and cannot やめる believe that they are 解放する／自由な. On the way 支援する we passed a few more stragglers returning, hoping to find something left. In one 完全に 難破させるd house I saw an old woman standing の中で all the がれき, with a duster in her 手渡す! God only knows what she thought she could do, but her woman's instinct told her she should get started on something. She was, in a way, a symbol, and one I shall never forget.
Five years of war today. Our Army is eleven miles from the German frontier, across the Moselle, and the Gertrude Lawrence 部隊 has arrived in Deauville.
The ride here was 拷問—through Cobourg and its 爆弾 噴火口，クレーターs (by misdirection), 支援する again 経由で Caen, 罠にかける in a four-mile-long R.A.F. 軍用車隊—through miles of utter 荒廃. 団体／死体s of dead Germans, looking like inflated rubber dolls, 嘘（をつく） 直面する 負かす／撃墜する in the waters of the Orne.
Deauville is not 不正に 損失d—it is just a dead seaside 訴える手段／行楽地. The Hotel Normandie is 戦前の in its French atmosphere with good carpets, smart windows, and a wide 厚かましさ／高級将校連 bed and all its trimmings. However, it is all like a movie 始める，決める—nothing 作品. Fancy fittings in the bathroom, but no water. (a)手の込んだ／(v)詳述する lamps and switches, but no electricity. Not even candles. A phantom hotel in a ghost town. As there are no 灯火管制／停電 curtains and we are forbidden to use even a flashlight after dark, we decided to go to bed while it was still light enough to unpack. I went to sleep. Suddenly I was startled by a distant banging and sat bolt upright in the dark. The knowledge that the enemy had been here only four days before made me think "Gestapo"! The banging continued, and I realized that it was no time to disobey. I grabbed my flashlight from under the pillow and つまずくd to the door. Without 開始 it, I said, "Qui est là " A 深い 発言する／表明する replied, "Open up. It's 追跡（する） here."
I didn't know who 追跡（する） was, but the 発言する／表明する was 明白に British, so I opened the door a 割れ目 and said, "What time is it, and what do you want?"
"I'm 中尉／大尉／警部補 追跡（する）. You are to get dressed at once and come with me!"
Definitely of the Gestapo 種類, I thought, but what was the fuss about? Was I about to be 法廷，裁判所-戦争のd?
I turned on my flashlight, and there stood a very tired-looking but 決定するd R.A.S.C. officer who 現在のd me with our orders.
I realized 即時に that this was an 出来事/事件 not to be 解任するd or 扱うd alone, so in the murky 不明瞭 I said, "Follow me, 中尉／大尉／警部補," and I took him along the 回廊（地帯） to Basil and Zoë's room. Zoë was already in bed and Basil was in the bathroom with a tiny bit of candle trying to shave in a teacup of water which he had 密輸するd from the dining room. We all pointed out to 中尉／大尉／警部補 追跡（する） that it was impossible for us to leave. Leslie and Joe were still out somewhere.
It was then 10:45 P.M., and the order was for us to 運動 by トラックで運ぶ to the Seine, get across at 6:00 A.M., 運動 forty-five キロs to Amiens, and do a show on arrival.
The 中尉／大尉／警部補 looked us over, and Basil said, "井戸／弁護士席, I don't know about anybody else's opinion. I have just washed my teeth and myself with half a cup of water. I'm going to finish shaving with the other half and then I'm going to bed."
中尉／大尉／警部補 追跡（する） saw our predicament, said he would return to Major Jamieson and make his 報告（する）／憶測, and we all went 支援する to bed to を待つ 法廷，裁判所-戦争の! Next morning we hung about the hotel, not daring to leave and waiting for the 召喚するs to come.
We packed up and were ready for the worst. At 10:30 A.M. our new orders （機の）カム and we started off with Captain Bayliss for St. Valery to join the column we'd 行方不明になるd the night before.
To reach St. Valery, we had to find a 橋（渡しをする） or a フェリー（で運ぶ） to take us across the Seine. We 動揺させるd along through the Breton Forest, past thousands of dead horses 発射 during the German 退却／保養地. We stopped at Quillebeuf, but the 橋（渡しをする） had been 爆破d away and we were sent on. A Frenchwoman （機の）カム running out, しっかり掴むd my 手渡す, and asked me to find her son in America and tell him she was 安全な and to please 令状 to her. From there we moved on along the winding shore of the Seine which almost 完全にするs a circle at this point. No 橋（渡しをする） remained 損なわれていない and no フェリー（で運ぶ） was running nearer than Rouen, a good ten hours away. We decided to go on to Grey's フェリー（で運ぶ） at Hauteville which our own R.E.s had built.
We paused at one-thirty in Pont-Audemer to eat and, as we were leaving, having given cigarettes to M. le patron and chocolate to the children, we saw a 調印する written on the 塀で囲む of the café which read, "This 設立 catered to the enemy during the war." We had been entertained and been fed by German collaborationists!
We 押すd on again and finally reached Hauteville at about three o'clock. Here again was a sight I shall never forget—all the 調印するs of utter 大混乱 and 失望させるd flight which the enemy had left behind him. The stench was sickening.
We were told the フェリー（で運ぶ） was not working, but "ducks" were crossing both ways with impertinent 緩和する. It was decided that Captain Bayliss and I should thumb a ride over and find our what help we could get from the other 味方する. So over we went, and 設立する the フェリー（で運ぶ） on the opposite bank in 告発（する），告訴（する）／料金 of 中尉／大尉／警部補 Doug Allen and his company of 王室の Canadian Engineers. He said the フェリー（で運ぶ） was out of 活動／戦闘 but there was a pontoon raft which he was sending over for 供給（する）s. If we talked to Corporal Pete he would know if it would take our extra 負わせる.
We 設立する Corporal Pete having his dinner on the grass by the mess wagon. He was an enormous man.
He paused with his mouth 十分な and 星／主役にするd at me.
"Don't I know you? I've seen you before, darned if I ain't."
"I've been in Canada," I said. "Several times."
Corporal Pete's 直面する （疑いを）晴らすd. "Got it. It was at the 開始する 王室の. I can tell you the year. It was I938. You was there lunching with 空気／公表する 保安官 Billy Bishop. You drank tomato juice. I remember that. And you did 同様に on it as lots of them do on scotch. You're Gertrude Lawrence. Shake." He held out a 抱擁する paw.
We shook, and—to show what tomato juice can 遂行する—on the strength of it Corporal Pete agreed to フェリー（で運ぶ） us across the Seine.
We sent word 支援する across the river to the others that we were coming for them and hoped to get them and the 乗り物 across. The raft was floated by six pontoons and driven by four モーターs. She looked all 権利 to us, until we saw the ギャング（団） start to man the pumps! They pumped and pottered for two hours. "They always take in a little water after a while," said one of the R.E.s. Finally the raft was brought と一緒に, a duck was hitched to it by a 牽引する-rope, and we were taken across. The party 元気づけるd as we arrived, and ramps were laid on the beach and we started to 負担 up. Our coach got on first, then a jeep, then a 供給（する） lorry, then another jeep.
It was 7:00 P.M. as we cast off to cross the Seine. The 現在の was running 急速な／放蕩な and strong away from where we 手配中の，お尋ね者 to go. However, it had been 平易な for the ducks, and the （期間が）わたる wasn't very wide at this point. This time, to my silent 狼狽, we had no duck to 援助（する） us, and five minutes after casting off one of our four engines conked out. We started to drift with the 激しい 現在の. Three engines were going like mad, but we were making no 前進 whatever. A duck （機の）カム と一緒に and threw us a line, but the tide was too strong and the towrope broke. We continued to lose ground, and finally Corporal Pete ordered the ギャング（団） to throw out the 錨，総合司会者, 説 we would ride where we were till help （機の）カム.
By this time it was getting dark, a 微風 was coming up, and I knew two things which I had not told the others. Each day the Seine is flooded by a bore which sweeps in from the Channel and 原因（となる）s a 潮の wave twelve feet high. All light （手先の）技術 are （疑いを）晴らすd from the water at this time. The night before sixty-three persons had been 溺死するd. The bore was 予定 to come at midnight, and it was now nine o'clock and we were at 錨，総合司会者 in midstream.
My heart was 続けざまに猛撃するing and my senses 警報 to the danger.
Finally Corporal Pete decided to 解除する 錨，総合司会者 and drift over to any part of the shore we could make and try to 荷を降ろす the raft before it got any later. I knew he meant before it got too late. He hoped to 荷を降ろす us all before the bore （機の）カム 負かす／撃墜する. We made the shore about a mile below where we should have landed, and 木造の 跡をつけるs were laid 負かす／撃墜する. One jeep got off and away. Next （機の）カム the lorry with 供給（する）s, but the bank was too 法外な and it got stuck. Just then, in the blackness, we heard the throb of モーターs, and dimly out of the 不明瞭 there ぼんやり現れるd the 形態／調整s of two ducks. They （機の）カム と一緒に, and it was decided to leave the lorry and get it by road the next morning. We put out into midstream again, the ducks were placed one in 前線 牽引するing and one at 支援する 押し進めるing, and our own engines were running. It was now very, very 冷淡な and 風の強い, but our spirits rose. We made a little 前進, then the pontoons began to splash over. It was too dark to bale and we couldn't spare the men. It was now ten-thirty. All methods were used to get us moving, but the river was a 激怒（する）ing 激流 by this time, and the ducks were going 一連の会議、交渉／完成する in circles, taking us with them.
Allen and Pete ordered, "Abandon ship and take to the ducks." The 乗り物s were 攻撃するd 負かす／撃墜する, we grabbed our 価値のあるs, and all 職員／兵員 took to the ducks and went hell for leather for the 上陸.
It's very strange, under 強調する／ストレス, what one regards as 価値のある. I luckily was in 戦う／戦い dress (trousers, shirt, and short jacket), so I was sure of 存在 able to swim. But my mind concentrated on the fact that, no 事柄 if all was lost, my 職業 was still to look glamorous, so I grabbed my make-up 道具. After all, I can always do a show if I've got my 誤った eyelashes. Clarence had saved his precious violin. Leslie had the music. But all else—含むing Joe Nicholls' five 派手に宣伝するs, our 衣装s and personal 着せる／賦与するing—had to be abandoned. We finally reached the 上陸 まっただ中に the 元気づけるs of the Canadian Engineer 軍団 who had been waiting for us, and we went 岸に fifteen minutes before we heard the whine and 急ぐ of the bore.
We had to stay somewhere for the night and would have been content in the fields, but the bore had brought rain with it, so we were packed into トラックで運ぶs and taken to a 砂漠d château which the enemy had taken over. Here were housed the 難民s from the 戦う／戦い areas, and here we slept that night, 密談する／（身体を）寄せ集めるd together on the 明らかにする boards, in our 着せる／賦与するs; tired, dirty, but lucky to be alive. I wondered where Richard was.
Next morning we were awakened at seven by our Captain Bayliss to be told to "look outside." We did, and there in the 中庭 stood our coach. The raft had ridden the bore and the Canadians had gone up at 夜明け with 海難救助 ducks and brought the whole thing 支援する to shore 損なわれていない. We washed in the stables with the men, went to breakfast at the field kitchen, and then got under way on the road to St. Valery. We were all very tired, and I ached all over from the boards and the 冷淡な and the long hours on the 噴火口，クレーター roads, but now we were really arriving as ordered by H.Q.
We reached St. Valery only to find a 完全に dead and 砂漠d town. Not a 兵士 or a 非軍事の in sight. The water 前線 was バリケードd and 示すd "Minen," so we 問い合わせd of a sort of gendarme. He sent us to the 市長, who told us that the 51st Highland 分割 had left that morning for Le Havre to help with the 包囲. As we were supposed to be joining our E.N.S.A. column, which was entertaining the 52d Highland 分割, we supposed we'd better follow on to Le Havre. Captain Bayliss said he didn't like the idea of taking us two women—Zoë and me—into that area without some 確定／確認 from H.Q., so he and the corporal and two of our 部隊 went off in our wagon to find the Army, while Zoë Basil, Clarence, and I stayed behind at St. Valery. Clarence, who speaks French, went scrounging around and 設立する an old couple who had just come 支援する to their home. They boiled some water for us, and Zoë and I had our first decent wash since leaving Lion-sur-Mer almost a week ago! We left our 捕らえる、獲得するs with the old couple and went for a walk. Everywhere was to be seen 破壊 and the 調印するs of the 猛烈な／残忍な street fighting before the enemy was driven out. We had no food with us, but we were again lucky and 設立する the people at the HÃ&激烈な／緊急の;tel de la Gare willing to 株 a meal with us. We paid them, of course, and they were très content to have the British instead of the enemy. At three o'clock an 老年の gendarme 棒 into the square on a bicycle, dismounted, and rang a bell. Half a dozen bedraggled women, four children, and three old folks, and ourselves gathered 一連の会議、交渉／完成する. With 広大な／多数の／重要な 儀式 he produced a dirty sheet of paper and began to read a 布告／宣言 that 国民s should not go into the fields or touch anything because of 地雷s; and that their （人命などを）奪う，主張するs for 損失 to 所有物／資産／財産 should be in at the 市長's office by Wednesday. He then 棒 slowly away, and the people drifted 支援する out of sight again, 支援する to the 仕事 of trying to make something out of nothing.
We hung about feeling very 目だつ and helpless. At five Captain Bayliss returned. They had been to Fé（軍の）野営地，陣営, but the 52d Highland 分割 was not there. From there they were sent to Etretat and finally caught up with it. But no 調印する of E.N.S.A. However, after he explained our 苦境, the C.O. agreed to send word 負かす／撃墜する the line 説 where we were and 示唆するd that we join them at Etretat and give a show.
Without meaning to be, we are now the most 前進するd E.N.S.A. 部隊. Basil, Zoë and I are billeted over a plumber's shop. The others are at a hotel. Last night we gave two shows, one for the men just out of the line, and one for those going into 戦う／戦い at Le Havre, and then we were given supper at the mess and the pipers played and danced for us.
Today, September the seventh, we were to join our E.N.S.A. column and do an outdoor show, but a 嵐／襲撃する has come. It is dark and raining hard, so we are lying around を待つing orders. The visibility is bad and the men cannot 飛行機で行く.
These men of the 52d Highland 分割 are magnificent 兵士s. They were at El Alamein, Sicily, Dunkirk, and have been in again since D-Day. They are having one swell time taking 支援する the ground they were 軍隊d to lose in the 早期に （選挙などの）運動をする. They swore they would come 支援する again, and they have kept their word.
We 押すd off again at 10:00 A.M. yesterday—got here at Bolbec at twelve-thirty. The enemy held the town only six days ago. I went over to the theater to see what it was like, and as usual 設立する no lights, no water, and everything soaking wet. We had three bulbs connected on a cord which had been given to us at Lion-sur-Mer by the R.E.M.E. So I got them out of the トラックで運ぶ, connected them to one empty socket in the 天井, and oh, wonder of wonders, they worked!
I then swept out the room, 設立する an awful old carpet up on the 行う／開催する／段階 and put it 負かす／撃墜する まっただ中に clouds of dust and fleas. But at least Zoë and I had some sort of a room to dress in. We have no 経営者／支配人 or 行う／開催する／段階 経営者／支配人 with us. Leslie has to tune the piano always and often has to go out and find one. We all do everything for ourselves, and I'm the one who does the scrounging.
I 設立する an old Frenchwoman on the way to the theater who was アイロンをかけるing in her window. So I went in, 申し込む／申し出d her some soap flakes which I had, and she 約束d to do some laundry for us. It is getting colder.
We are giving two shows a day, at three o'clock and at six-thirty, and the place is jammed. They come in direct from the line, some all bound up, dirty, tired, but all in 広大な／多数の／重要な spirits, and they sing as though their 肺s must burst. It's 広大な／多数の／重要な to be with them, and all grouses disappear once the show is on. If they can take it, we most surely can. I have only a little more time over here before returning to London and to the U.S.A. to 実行する my 契約. But hardships all considered, I am beginning to wish I could stay, and hang my panties on the Siegfried Line.
I wish somebody—anybody—could come and see what our little 部隊 can do. Three in the orchestra—piano, violin, and 派手に宣伝するs. And three others—Basil, Zoë and me. No bally-hoo, no fuss, no publicity. In the daytime we 株 our rations of white bread, chocolate, and cigarettes with the village children. They have had no white bread since the German 占領／職業—some have never before tasted chocolate. The eternal cry is "Cigarettes for Papa." The évacuées still are coming in on foot from Le Havre. I got my new ration of chocolate, 甘いs, and 薄焼きパン／素焼陶器s today, and took them 負かす／撃墜する to the street outside our hotel. The children appeared from everywhere like London sparrows, and the ration is now fini!
Last night we had supper at the château now 占領するd by the 王室の 大砲 Anti-戦車／タンク 軍団. It was exciting because several of the officers had just come 支援する from Le Havre where they saw the 降伏する of the German general.
There was a 支持を得ようと努めるd 解雇する／砲火／射撃 炎ing in the 広大な／多数の／重要な fireplace of the château and I 事実上 sat in it. The 冷淡な, 侵入するing dampness is becoming worse each day. I have no warm pajamas or cardigan and can't get any. Today I lined my shoes with newspaper to keep my feet warm. I dare not 危険 catching a 冷淡な or even the sniffles. My 職業 is to sing and look glamorous. Not too 平易な in the 条件s we are living and traveling under.
When I heard they had a real bath with hot water at the château I すぐに 始める，決める about making myself as charming and popular as possible to 軟化する up the 領土 準備の to making a request for a half-hour in the tub.
Later: 式のs, for my hopes of a bath. The 激しい 戦車／タンクs coming from Le Havre have broken the water mains.
This 商売／仕事 of 存在 without water is worse than all other 不快s. We all have l'estomac de Normandie again, and the sanitary 施設s are 事実上 nonexistent.
I discovered a 列／漕ぐ／騒動 of three evil-smelling, ramshackle outhouses, all open at the 最高の，を越す, behind the theater where we are doing our show. These were used by 軍隊／機動隊s and 非軍事のs. The 協定 is decidedly 原始の—no seat, just a 穴を開ける in the ground and two places for your feet. You 簡単に crouch and let nature take its course.
Humiliating as it was to have to 訴える手段／行楽地 to these 対策, I could have borne that had I not suddenly become aware that I was not alone. The cubicle beside 地雷 was also 占領するd. There I stood, 決めかねて whether to make a dash for it or to wait until the man left. If I dashed, I might run into him. I could only pray that when I made my 入り口 on the line: "Here she comes, our own glamorous Gertrude Lawrence," my neighbor would not 認める me from our last informal 会合!
So I stayed. Hours, it seemed. Men （機の）カム and went. Dysentery is no respecter of persons. Finally, with only fifteen minutes to show time, I bolted from my cubicle, like the mechanical hare at a greyhound race, and sprinted over the uneven ground to the 支援する door of the theater. I was 安全な.
Yesterday at Foreshon the 行う／開催する／段階 was twelve feet from the 床に打ち倒す. No one had 直す／買収する，八百長をするd the lights and everything was filthy. Zoë and I 手配中の，お尋ね者 to get our things into the dressing room but could do nothing in the dark. While waiting for an electrician to turn up, we pulled off our coats and 押し進めるd the seats closer to the 行う／開催する／段階. We were only six 芸能人s in that 広大な place. Even if the "マイク" could be made to work, we had to have the men nearer to us.
Still no one showed up to 直す／買収する，八百長をする the lights.
"Let's see what we can do," said Zoë.
武装した with flashlights, she and I went below and poked about in the 破片 until we discovered a small room with a 沈む and one electric-light socket. We 大（公）使館員d to this our three bulbs on their 柔軟な cord. Those 緊急 lights and my make-up 道具 were the most important part of my baggage. We tied the cord to a 麻薬を吸う running 一連の会議、交渉／完成する the room and hoped the bulbs would work if—and when—the juice was turned on.
By this time the men were already lining up for the show. The first comers 解除するd the piano の上に the 行う／開催する／段階 for us. 一方／合間, Basil arrived and put up two posters so the men would know what they were going to see.
At this moment the electrician showed up. He 知らせるd us that the lighting system was controlled from Bolbec, six miles away. He had to go there to get 許可 to turn it on, if it would turn on.
He left, and we sat 負かす／撃墜する to wait, dirty, tired, and frayed at the 神経 ends. No one was in a welcoming mood when the Public Relations officer put in an 外見 and said, reproachfully, he had the カメラマン in 牽引する and they had been chasing us all over フラン. And would we please come out at once and have the pictures done. You don't say "I won't" to a three-pipper, so we 提起する／ポーズをとるd with the boys. I tried to look glamorous, though most of my make-up was gone, and the dust of the cellar had not 改善するd my 外見.
Finally the lights （機の）カム on, and we all 急ぐd below to dress. The men 注ぐd into the theater, and once again the spirit of the trouper rose to its usual 高さs.
Just as we were about to begin, our driver discovered that the "マイク" was not working again. It was too late to do anything about it, the show had to go on. So we started, but one by one we died at our 地位，任命するs. Not a sound could be heard from any of us in that 抱擁する place. The men became restless, and no wonder.
We got it over, and then I struck. "No show tonight unless the マイク is 直す／買収する，八百長をするd." After all, as someone pointed out, there were some six hundred 専門家技術者s within call, who could easily 直す／買収する，八百長をする the マイク for us.
We were drinking welcome cups of real tea—our first since leaving England—when suddenly a 発言する／表明する にわか景気d out above us: "Hello, 実験（する）ing. Hello, 実験（する）ing."
A sergeant had changed a 弁 in the マイク outfit and it worked.
So we put on another show at once for the newly arrived audience.
This time everything started beautifully. The 予備交渉 was O.K. We heard Clarence 発表する: "Joe Nicholls, the 井戸／弁護士席-known London drummer." At this every light in the place went off.
Zoë and I sat in our dressing room in stunned silence, knowing that the switch was controlled from Bolbec, six miles away.
We could hear Joe drumming in the dark. How did he do it? We 設立する out later—he stood の近くに to the マイク and played on his big strong teeth! And he kept it up until the lights （機の）カム on again. We finished the show.
The E.N.S.A. shows are supposed to be only for the 軍隊／機動隊s. Now and then you see a 非軍事の seated の中で the boys. There was one little old lady in the audience at Etretat. She had billeted our 部隊 and had helped us 大いに. During the four years of German 占領／職業 she had 辞退するd to see a show. Now she sat in the 前線 列／漕ぐ／騒動, smiling 概して and trying to join in the singing of "Tipperary," while the 涙／ほころびs rolled 負かす／撃墜する her cheeks.
運動ing north toward Belgium, we made a triumphal 進歩 through towns which had been in German 手渡すs only a few days before.
As we made our way slowly 負かす／撃墜する the main street, 避けるing a few 爆撃する 穴を開けるs, men, women, and children turned out to 迎える／歓迎する us. We all 屈服するd and smiled.
"I know now how the Queen feels at the 開始 of 議会," said Zoë.
Our 目的地 was Brussels. Other than that we knew nothing. But it was enough. Brussels had just been 解放するd, the 前線 was very の近くに, we would be entertaining men straight from the fighting line. At Lille, where we put up for the night, no billets had been arranged for us, as the enemy had 孤立した too short a time before. However, Clarence knew the city and was able to guide us to a hotel where they made room for us. Everywhere people were breathless at the 速度(を上げる） with which the 同盟（する）s were 前進するing.
Just before the 郊外s of Brussels Bayliss said: "There's Major Jamieson." He had just passed us in his jeep and honked for us to stop. Our spirits were in good 形態／調整 but our stomachs were empty. This seemed a happy chance, and Captain Bayliss got out. While he and Jamieson met in 私的な 会議／協議会, we sat like good children in a school bus and waited.
Then Jamieson （機の）カム to the door of our car and said, "Everything all 権利?" I suppose we nodded, and he went on gaily: "Wonderful hotel for you all laid on in Brussels. Glorious new theater. There's hot and 冷淡な water. And light. Mrs. Herbert is there."
We 星／主役にするd at him. It sounded too good to be true—hot and 冷淡な water!
He then dashed off and we 衝突，墜落d into a flood of questions to Bayliss: "Where are we staying? For how long?"
"I don't know. My orders are to 配達する you to 陸軍大佐 Haggarth on arrival, and the show is at seven-thirty tonight."
We had by now come two hundred and sixty miles, had started off that morning without even a warm drink. It was already one-fifteen and we had to 報告（する）／憶測 to the 陸軍大佐 even before going to our hotel. On 最高の，を越す of this, we were 推定する／予想するd to give a 業績／成果 at night in 着せる／賦与するs that had been packed up for two days. Everybody in the coach 公約するd that there could not かもしれない be a show that night.
Brussels was 持つ／拘留するing carnival with 旗s, （人が）群がるs, and the White 旅団 patrolling the streets, 一連の会議、交渉／完成するing up collaborationists.
As our トラックで運ぶ （機の）カム to a 行き詰まり in the Grand' Place, people gathered around, 需要・要求するing to know the meaning of E.N.S.A. on our shoulders. 非，不，無 of us could tell them, so we got out, did a few dance steps, and said "Cabaret."
They understood that all 権利. To make it all （疑いを）晴らす I 追加するd:
"Cabaret 注ぐ le soldat."
A 元気づける went up. Then すぐに a clamor began: "Cigarettes? Chocolat? Savon?" Hundreds of 手渡すs stretched out.
Savon—soap—was what I 手配中の，お尋ね者 too. That and gallons of hot water, and a bed to stretch my aching 団体／死体 on. Captain Bayliss had gone in search of the 陸軍大佐 to 報告（する）／憶測 us and there were no 調印するs of his return. Basil was in a 非常に高い 激怒（する）, Zoë fidgeted—she 手配中の，お尋ね者 to go to the lavatory and nobody could find one. Clarence and Joe and Leslie philosophically went to sleep.
Presently Bayliss （機の）カム 支援する and said the 陸軍大佐 was at lunch, but a corporal had told him we were all billeted at the Hotel Metropole, which turned out to be a 広大な place but 完全に 砂漠d. The proprietor looked uneasy and said a room had been 調書をとる／予約するd for 行方不明になる Lawrence, but 非，不，無 for the 残り／休憩（する） of the party. This was strange and a bit terrifying when I 設立する out—as I soon did—that the hotel was 存在 ボイコット（する）d by the ベルギーs as the proprietors were said to be collaborationists.
I did not at all like the idea of staying there by myself.
However, I was famished, and the Metropole had food—soup, salmon with mayonnaise, and dessert. Price per person, one hundred フランs. We were just beginning on this ruinously expensive meal when in walked 中尉／大尉／警部補 Charles Rogers, whom we'd last seen in the Orkneys. He said the others had been billeted at the 王室の Nord, and I said quickly:
"Then I'll go there. They'll have to find a place for me there. I won't stay anywhere without my 部隊."
He agreed to take me, and then we got out all our money to 支払う／賃金 our lunch 法案. There was a fuss over this, as neither Bayliss nor I nor Charles Rogers had any ベルギー money, and the proprietor at first 辞退するd to 受託する French money.
We were impatient to get going and to unpack because Charles had told us we had to give a show that night. Fourteen thousand 軍隊／機動隊s were in the city. Prince Bernhard of the Netherlands was also there to celebrate the 上陸 of British 空気／公表する-borne 軍隊／機動隊s in Holland.
"I （機の）カム here to entertain the 軍隊／機動隊s, not to entertain 王族," I said snappily. "But if it's an Army order——"
"It is," said Charles.
Finally we got away from the horrible Metropole and I was given a room at the 王室の Nord with the ギャング（団）.
Brussels had a 外出禁止令. We were 警告するd that a lot of 狙撃s took place at night. Our 兵士s went about with ライフル銃／探して盗むs. The city had no tea, no coffee, no butter, no bread. But it had water and lights. And real, clean beds. Breakfast next morning was doubtful. I made a glass of tea in my room and drank it with a German field-ration 薄焼きパン／素焼陶器 which we had 設立する at Lion-sur-Mer and which I had brought along as a souvenir. The tea—one teaspoonful of the real 商品／必需品—was given me by Zoë I made a tea 捕らえる、獲得する of make-up muslin and heated the water in my field mess can on a German stove.
The 業績／成果 that night was in a theater about the size of the 無線で通信する City Music Hall in New York. So long as the Germans 占領するd Brussels, ベルギーs were not 許すd there, so, since we took over, the 陸軍大佐 had decided 非軍事のs should be 認める to shows. A 先頭 with a loudspeaker 発表するing the show had gone through the streets, so the house was filled. But no 軍隊／機動隊s. And no Prince Bernhard. Just a few R.A.F. on the 味方する aisles.
Of course we did the show in English. It didn't 事柄 when we sang. But Basil, who is a patter comedian, was up against it. He solved this by raising his オペラ hat when he （機の）カム on and 説 politely, "Vive la Belgique."
That brought enormous 賞賛, and after that whatever Basil said was received enthusiastically by the audience who could not have understood a 選び出す／独身 word of it.
At seven-thirty last night—in the theater, while I was waiting to go on—非，不，無 other than 陸軍大佐 Haggarth himself （機の）カム to me with an 緊急の 嘆願 that I stay for another three days and go into Antwerp! Three thousand Canadians have just come in from the 前線 line, and even though the enemy was only three miles outside the city they 手配中の，お尋ね者 a show and had asked for the Gertrude Lawrence 部隊.
I quickly wrote out two cables to be sent through the War Office in London: one to Gilbert Miller, who was 推定する／予想するing me daily to start rehearsals on a new play, and the other to Richard, telling of the 陸軍大佐's request.
We drove the forty-five キロメーターs from Brussels to Antwerp and put on our shows at the E.N.S.A. Music Hall. It was my 別れの（言葉，会） 業績／成果 on the Western 前線, and it was played to the accompaniment of 砲火. British 戦車／タンクs of the Guards' 装甲の 分割 had 逮捕（する）d the city proper just twenty days before, but the Germans were still in 命令（する） of the 郊外 of Merxem. This put 出身の Rundstedt だいたい three thousand yards from the theater.
The hall was packed with Canadians and a dash of British and Yanks. I made my 入り口 to the last eight 妨げる／法廷，弁護士業s of "Some Day I'll Find You," and swung すぐに into "A Lovely Way to Spend an Evening."
"Isn't it," I thought, as a 爆撃する burst の近くに by. I asked over the footlights: "Is there a Joe in the house? Anybody here 指名するd Joe?"
Of course there was; there always is. He was sitting in the second 列／漕ぐ／騒動, which made it 平易な to sing 直接／まっすぐに to him: "A Guy 指名するd Joe." He 低迷d 負かす／撃墜する in his seat and I could see his neck and ears get red, but the other fellows enjoyed his discomfiture as much as the song itself and joined in the chorus. Then an E.N.S.A. corporal unrolled a 掲示 with the words of the song on it.
I called on six 兵士s from the 前線 列／漕ぐ／騒動 to help 持つ／拘留する the 掲示. They leaped the footlights, の中で them Joe from the second 列／漕ぐ／騒動. We put on an impromptu 小競り合い, to the delight of the 残り／休憩（する） of the house, and the six went 支援する to their seats with an imprint of my best lipstick on their cheeks.
I used up a lot of lipstick on my 小旅行する of the Western 前線. In （軍の）野営地，陣営s where we played two shows in quick succession I decorated more 兵士s than General Eisenhower had to date.
The program ended with a singsong, 含むing "Irish 注目する，もくろむs," "You Made Me Love You," "少しの Doch-an-Dorris," and "Tipperary." Finally we sang "I'll See You Again," and I thought to myself: it's a 約束 and a 祈り.
I am 令状ing this in the 計画（する） on my way 支援する to America.
My service on the Western 前線 is over. I hope I have repaid some of what I 借りがあるd to those British Tommies of World War I who dug into their breeches pockets and brought 前へ／外へ the half 栄冠を与えるs and shillings that paid my fare to London and my first real chance in Charlot's Revue.
England is my country, but I am married to an American. Now that I have done my bit for E.N.S.A., I hope the U.S.O. will send me out with a show to entertain the American boys. I would like to serve both countries that I love and belong to.
The 大西洋, which seems not nearly so wide now as it once was, is below me at this minute. Our 計画（する） purrs softly through banks of cloud. Its 向こうずねing nose is pointed 西方の.
The 船長／主将 has just paused beside my seat and whispered confidentially: "Lunch in New York tomorrow."
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